Give Antiva My Regards
by lemonjay
Summary: m!Cousland & Leliana from the final battle, through Awakening, and beyond.  Aedan learns that happiness rests upon the edge of a knife when the Antivan Crows come calling.  In the aftermath he recruits Zevran to help him end their threat.  Chapter 21 - Highever Castle welcomes a new resident.
1. Chapter 1

Dragon Age, its characters, locations and all related IP are owned by BioWare.

I want to give some forewarning that this story will bounce around for a while to flesh out the themes and motives of the characters before we hit the heart of it. Also, while I can certainly appreciate the witticisms and one-liners or our elven assassin he was never one of my favourite characters. Between writing this and replaying the game (and taking him everywhere) I am hoping to change that.

Thanks for reading and of course any comments or criticisms are welcome.

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Chapter One

14 Kingsway, 9:31 Dragon

Redcliffe Castle – morning of departure for Denerim and the final battle of the Fifth Blight

The Grey Warden Aedan Cousland knocked on the door again to no avail. He knew that the person he wished to speak to was inside and for spite was ignoring him. He had been at this for some time now and his temper was beginning to flare.

"I would rather not break the door down but I will unless someone opens this damned door!" The Warden looked at one of the guards flanking the door and whispered for his ears alone. "Could you please see if Arl Eamon has a key to this door? I really would prefer not to destroy his home."

Heavy footsteps pounded the stone as the guard set about his charge. Out of the corner of his eye he saw the door open a crack and he thrust his foot forwards, stopping the door from closing. He grabbed the edge of the door and pushed it open further.

"Erlina help me close this door! Guards, you are here to protect me! Attack him!" Anora screamed.

Aedan leaned in and pushed the door open the rest of the way.

"Queen Anora. Mademoiselle Erlina. It is a pleasure to see you both again," Aedan said while giving a small bow. He had thought to use Anora's former title to make her at ease and comfortable so that she would listen to what he had to say. He could see from her expression that it did anything but.

"I am Queen no longer thanks to you," Anora screamed at him. She turned on him and slapped the Warden, who stood there immobile. She slapped him again and finally moved closer and pounded her fists against his armoured chest. Tears flowed from her eyes either from her rage or the pain from the small cuts to her hands from Aedan's armour.

"Please stop your Majesty," the Warden said calmly as he gently grasped her wrists. "Erlina, could you please get a kerchief so I can wrap the Queen's hands?"

"Remove your hands from me!" Anora commanded waspishly. "You have already stripped me of my dignity, you cannot have my virtue." She delighted at seeing the look of pain and disgust on the Warden's face.

"You wound me with your words your Majesty. I am not such a man who would force himself upon a woman," Aedan said, struggling to keep his voice calm. "As I said before I only wish to speak to you and would prefer to do so without the door interfering."

The Warden watched as Anora's handmaiden cleaned and dressed her wounds. He knew this conversation would be difficult but should the Grey Wardens fall in Denerim she must hear what he had to say or else Ferelden was doomed.

"Thank you Erlina, would you please grant us some privacy?" asked Aedan.

"If you wish to speak to me then Erlina will remain," Anora said defiantly.

The Warden shrugged his shoulders and decided to continue. What he had to say would be harder for her to hear than for him to speak.

"As you know the army leaves for Denerim this morning where we expect to confront the archdemon itself. Maker willing this will be the final battle and we will stop the Blight but we do leave for battle and anything is possible. It is about possibilities that I wish to speak to you about." Aedan paused and waited for Anora to acknowledge his words before continuing.

"Firstly, I must have your word that should all of the Grey Wardens fall and the archdemon still lives that with all haste you will send word to the Orlesian Wardens and allow them entry to Ferelden," said Aedan, his tone deathly serious.

"My father did not wish to see the Orlesians and their support troops enter Ferelden. What assurances do we have that they will leave?" Anora responded.

"My father also fought for Ferelden's freedom alongside King Maric. I too was raised with tales of the horrors of the Orlesian occupation. My family has shed blood to protect this land for hundreds of years and I too would gladly give my live to keep Ferelden free," Cousland said passionately.

The Warden took a deep breath to calm himself and then knelt down in front of Anora. He gently took her hands in his and looked up into her eyes hoping she would hear the truth of his words and see it in his eyes.

"Your father was wrong - Grey Wardens are sworn to stop a Blight wherever it is regardless of nationality. I give you my word as a Cousland that should of all Ferelden's Wardens fall the Orlesian Wardens are our country's only hope – only a Grey Warden can kill the archdemon. I swear to you that _every _Warden across all of Thedas knows that the archdemon has taken the field of battle and that you will be Queen of nothing if you refuse their aid.

"If we are lost and you do not ask the Warden's for assistance then no country will come to your aid. They will write Ferelden off as already lost to the darkspawn and see to their own protection. I do not say this as a threat but as fact. At Ostagar your father, Loghain, set Ferelden on a path to its destruction and the battle for Denerim will tell if he succeeded. I pray to Andraste and the Maker that should we fail in the upcoming battle you do not follow your father's path," the Warden said.

"And if I should refuse to give you my word?" Anora asked.

"Then I am truly sorry your Majesty but I will kill you here and now as a traitor to Ferelden. You will be allying yourself with the archdemon and the darkspawn horde against everything that is good in this world. I will then seek out another not blinded by anger and hate and with the sense to hear the truth of my words," the Warden said flatly. Aedan saw the shock on her face as the colour left it. "Do you wish to know why I chose Alistair over you?

Anora nodded for him to continue, unable to speak.

"While my brother Fergus is the heir to Highever I too was also raised to rule. I was taught to lead my people, to administer our lands and finances, to ensure that justice is served and to settle disputes, to build strategy and lead troops into battle. My father would often say that there was a science to ruling and that it was more than making grand plans and issuing commands. The most important element to the science of rule is in your relationship with your people.

"I have attended Landsmeets and other functions with my parents and have seen you interact with both the nobility and commoners. Over the past year I have travelled Ferelden not as a lord of a proud and ancient house, but simply as a Grey Warden and a man. I have met nobles and commoners, dwarves and elves. I have watched firsthand as your father fought against his fellow Fereldans while ignoring the true threat. His actions at Ostagar and afterwards have resulted in the deaths of uncounted soldiers and innocent men, women and children from all races while the darkspawn have gone unchecked.

"No one can deny that as Queen you have been the true power on the throne but you are a weak Queen. I do not mean that you should be a tyrant or should pick up a sword and lead men into battle but your lack of action over the past year is damning. Whether by your actions or ignorance you allowed your father, who you must have known had all but killed your husband and king, to sit on your throne as regent. Loghain named himself regent and pushed you aside as if you were but some child, untrained and unable to sit upon the throne that had already been yours for five years. Your father was already General of Ferelden's armies - could he not have led without being regent?" the Warden asked. He continued without giving Anora a chance to respond.

"Innocent Ferelden's were sold into Tevinter slavery or left defenceless to die at the hands of the darkspawn and evil men. All while traitors like Howe were allowed to collect titles as if they fell from the sky while Ferelden's noble families disappeared in all too convenient ways and innocents suffered. Did you investigate the sacking of Highever? Or the poisoning of Arl Eamon? How about the death of the Arl of Denerim? What became of his rapist son Vaughn? How long did the riots last in Denerim's Alienage? Did you investigate their cause?"

Anora could not bring herself to answer the Warden. His mother, Teryna Eleanor Cousland, had been a dear friend to her and her husband Bryce was an honest and honourable man and yet she had done nothing to investigate their deaths. The same was true for others as well. She had despised Howe and yet idly watched as he grew in power and influence. When she asked her father if he had killed her husband she had accepted his words even though every instinct she possessed screamed they were false.

"The people love you Anora as their Queen because you give them hope. Your father was born a commoner but became one of this nation's greatest heroes. He became a member of the nobility, one of its highest ranking even. His daughter became the Queen of Ferelden – all in one generation. Your story inspires them but you however do not.

"Ferelden needs a ruler who can inspire its people. Not only to defeat the darkspawn that greatly outnumber us, but also in the days after the battle when we must mourn the fallen and build a better Ferelden. You are a beautiful and intelligent woman Anora, and certainly an able administrator of the realm, but you are also cold and calculating. I do believe that in your own way you love the people of this land but you seem to think of them as faceless masses and forget that they are real people, each with their own hopes and dreams.

"Alistair can inspire the people and is truly Maric's son. He acts in the best interests of others and for Ferelden and the people see and are drawn to that. He is kind and compassionate and honestly does not want to be king, but he will do so to the best of his abilities and he will rise to the occasion. I did press for Alistair to take you as his wife not only because I felt it would be the best way to unite Ferelden and make a lasting peace, but also because the two of you would strengthen each other. Where Alistair is weak you are strong and where you are weak he is strong. I pressed your case but I would not force him to choose you as his wife after I forced him onto the throne.

"After the Blight ends and Alistair still lives then you must know that no one will support your claim to the throne. I would urge you to accept that you are now a dowager Queen without any claims. If you are honest in your desire to rebuild Ferelden and have her best interests at heart I do believe that Alistair will restore Gwaren to your family. I have no doubt that it will be difficult for you but I would not like to see you locked away until the end of your days. Ferelden will need your intelligence and skill."

Aedan paused to let his words sink in. He could see from her face that Anora was angry with him. His words were not intended to hurt her but to provide reasoning for his actions and hopefully cause her to reflect upon them. For the most part she had been a good Queen but for today and the days that follow she was not the right ruler for Ferelden.

"I had never killed another man before Howe attacked my family and I have killed many more since then and except for Rendon Howe I have regretted them all," Aedan said quietly. "I took no pleasure in killing your father though for his crimes he deserved it. I also regret my decisions that have led you to this place. Please know that I did not make them lightly or with malice but in the best interests of my country and in service to the oaths I swore and my duty to end the Blight.

"You said earlier that I stripped you of your rule and your dignity and I would challenge that. I would argue that your own father had already stripped you of your rule and that only you can strip yourself of your dignity."

Horns sounded to muster the army for departure.

"I have a final thought for you, your majesty and then I will impose upon you no longer," Aedan said. "Do you love Ferelden and all her people?"

"Of course I do," Anora hissed at him.

"If I had supported your bid for the throne and Alistair had refused to renounce his claims what would you have done?" asked the Warden.

"I would have had him executed," Anora answered sharply.

"And yet when you refused to renounce your claims Alistair did not execute you," Aedan said calmly, getting to the heart of what he had come here to say. "Certainly he imprisoned you, but he also commanded that if he fell in battle that you become Queen once again. Alistair serves his people and puts their needs and Ferelden's needs _first_ and _that_ is why he is King."

Aedan watched as Anora recoiled from his last words as if he had struck her. He waited in silence for her decision.

"I swear to you that if all of Ferelden's Grey Wardens are lost I will send word to the Orlesian Wardens and allow them entry," Anora said at little more than a whisper.

"Thank you your Majesty," the Warden replied.

Aedan stood and forced himself to walk slowly to the door. He could hear Anora begin to cry behind him and as he paused in the hall outside her room he heard the crash of breaking glass.


	2. Chapter 2

_Sorry for the long span between updates. Major PC problems compounded with my own stupidity meant that I lost some data and had to rewrite a few chapters. To anyone who is also reading 'Betrayal of Love and Trust' there will be an update either later today or tomorrow. Thanks for reading._

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_Chapter Two

Final Battle of the Fifth Blight atop Fort Drakon

The smell of burned flesh and blood hung heavy in the air. Just over a year of effort had come down to this hopefully final battle and they were in danger of losing it.

Riordan, the Grey Warden they rescued from Howe's dungeons, had given his life to cripple the archdemon, tearing one its wings and driving it down atop the roof of Fort Drakon where it could be killed.

Any thoughts that the crippled archdemon would prove an easy kill however had been foolishly optimistic. Even wounded the dragon was of such power that it had already slaughtered scores of the soldiers that had followed the Wardens onto the roof. As if the demon's own attacks were not ferocious enough it also called to the darkspawn horde to protect it, and even now Aedan could see them pouring forth from the towers at each corner of the roof.

"Archers. Mages. Thin them out," Aedan screamed as he thrust his sword at the darkspawn reinforcements. "Pikemen and shield bearers form up and protect them."

Aedan watched as the pikemen quickly moved to form a phalanx to the west while the sword and shield fighters moved to form another to the east. The soldiers joining their shields, protecting one another, with weapons held before them. A phalanx was only as strong as its weakest man but today, in this battle, no man would falter – it was victory or death and they all knew it. They would defeat the archdemon and end the Blight or Ferelden would be lost, overrun by darkspawn and all they loved and held dear either dead or destroyed.

"Everyone else with me. Death to the archdemon. Victory for Ferelden!" Aedan cried out and ran up the ramp to the raised section of roof where they had driven the archdemon. He heard warcries joining his own as he stabbed his sword to the left and his dagger to the right, indicating he wanted the men to surround the dragon and pressure it from all sides.

He looked at the archdemon before him. Blood poured from the ballista bolts lodged in its side and the cuts they had made to its body and legs though it still had plenty of fight left.

Aedan looked to his immediate left seeing his fellow Grey Warden and King, Alistair, and smiled. He turned to his right and saw Sten and Zevran.

"Zevran, can you keep it distracted with your bow while the rest of us engage in close?" Aedan asked and saw the elven assassin nod. Given a choice he would have preferred Leliana covering them with her bow but he had made a conscious decision and had left her at the city gates.

They advanced on the archdemon and slipped into familiar tactics with Alistair supporting Sten who engaged head on. Aedan normally would dart in and around the enemy, relieving the pressure from the heavy hitters and giving them space to unleash their attacks. He primarily used his sword and dagger to chisel away at the enemy, constantly in motion, though if the opportunity presented itself he was more than capable of unleashing mayhem. Facing the archdemon he came in to the right of its massive head and at a slight angle. He could see the others advancing around the foul beast.

From the corner of his eye he saw Sten land an overhead slash to the chest of the dragon as he slashed at the joint of its left foreleg, digging deep.

"Watch the tail!" Aedan warned too late. The archdemon swept its massive tail, knocking aside six men too focused on the dragon in front of them to remember that the tail could attack from the side.

Time lost all meaning as they continued their deadly dance with the archdemon. Weapons slashing, shields bashing and arrows piercing, each hit chipping away at the dragon. Everyone engaged against the archdemon and the darkspawn coming to their master's aid had taken a hit and shed some blood.

He would never know what possessed him to do it but after Aedan found himself alongside the beast he ran underneath the archdemon's soft underbelly, between its legs, with his sword Starfang raised above him. The impossibly sharp blade cutting deeply, spilling ichor and entrails as its flame and lightning runes burned flesh. The Warden almost made it safely through the treacherous path but the Archdemon in its fury kicked him with its rear right leg, catching Aedan in the chest and launching him into the air.

Aedan shook his head to regain his bearings, seeing that he landed to the left and behind his companions. He slowly stood, noting from his strained breathing and pained chest that he had probably broken a few ribs.

The archdemon roared and he could feel the pressure in his head building as he almost doubled over from the pain. Aedan could hear the archdemon now frantically calling the horde, demanding their immediate assistance.

He could see Alistair and Sten attacking the dragon's legs and chest but the foul beast only had eyes for him. The archdemon braced itself and then launched forwards, jumping over his companions and landing near Aedan.

The dragon's head came down attempting to bite Aedan with its powerful jaws; its head moving far too quickly for something so large. The Warden barely managed to side-step the beast. He could feel his knees pressed against the archdemon's massive jaw and see its left eye right before him, staring at him.

Aedan thrust Duncan's dagger and stabbed that cold black eye. He felt his legs swept out from underneath him as the dragon shook its great head. Before he could let go of the dagger Aedan was being lifted into the air as the dragon reared in pain.

The Warden was torn from his grip on the dagger and for a moment he was flying up into the air. All too quickly he began to fall back down to earth and certain injury if not death.

The archdemon plucked its tormentor right out of the air and Aedan screamed in pain as he began to feel razor-sharp teeth pierce his flesh as the stench of death and decay washed over him from the dragon's hot breath.

Alistair looked at the dragon in horror. His friend and fellow Warden was trapped in its jaws and was being shaken like a rag doll, already he could see Aedan's blood running from its snout. He ran at the archdemon screaming his rage. He stabbed upwards into its chest before being knocked aside.

Aedan was in so much pain that he didn't know how he was still alive. He could feel his sword in his hand and knew that it was only because the dragon's jaws had trapped his sword-arm in its mouth when it had shaken him.

With all of his remaining strength he twisted and stabbed Starfang upwards, hoping that he would pierce the tender flesh of the archdemon's mouth and, Maker willing, drive into its brain.

The dragon issued a bone rattling roar, covering Aedan in blood and dragon spit. He flew from the archdemon's mouth and he could hear bones break as he crashed onto the roof.

Alistair watched as Aedan flew from the archdemon's mouth landing heavily, he moved to check on his friend and had almost reached him when he heard the sounds of the archdemon falling. He looked at his brother Warden and his heart fell as surely Aedan was dead. His legs were bent at such odd angles that they must be broken. A line of dragon teeth bites ran along his back, from his hip up to shoulder and across, and he was certain a matching set would be found on his chest. The fine drakeskin armour Wade had made for him afforded no more protection than if Aedan had been wearing simple linens.

He held Aedan up to his chest and he could feel the tears begin to flow. The Warden's body spasmed and Alistair saw him cough up blood and from the colour not all of it was his own. Alistair reached to his belt and retrieved a healing poultice, pulling out the cork stopper with his teeth before pouring it down Aedan's throat. He then emptied another one into his friend. Three more he simply poured directly onto the worst of his fellow Warden's wounds, knowing that time was of the essence. There was no point holding anything in reserve, this was the final battle and he had seen the archdemon fall.

"We need a healer," Alistair cried out.

"The archdemon is still alive," Sten calmly said.

A distant part of Alistair had hoped that after the archdemon had fallen and he had found Aedan still alive that Riordan had been mistaken, that ending the Blight would not take one of their lives.

"A Grey Warden must make the final blow or else the archdemon will be reborn. Halt all attacks unless it rises," Alistair ordered the giant Qunari who promptly stepped away to carry out the order.

"Alistair, drag me over there so I can take the final blow," Aedan said weakly.

"Look at you. You'll never be able to swing a blade."

"I'm already dying and we both know what will happen when the blow is struck. There is no need for you to throw you life away, my King. I have strength enough for this if you get me near."

Alistair looked at his friend and even though he knew the depths of strength and willpower in his brother Warden he doubted Aedan was up to this task. The enchantments in the items he wore and his own stubborn refusal to die until his task was done was probably all that was keeping him alive. It would be so easy to let Aedan take the final blow, but Aedan had Leliana, who loved him, and more importantly he knew that time was critical. He too heard the archdemon's incessant call to the darkspawn. It had to die now or they would be overwhelmed, he could almost feel the horde coming to its master's aid. He gently laid Aedan down on his back.

"Rest easy brother, we'll see each other in the Fade and you can kick my ass then," Alistair said with a smirk before turning serious. "This is my duty, both as King and Grey Warden. I want to be a good King for Ferelden. And this right here is the best King I could be, my first and last act being to stop the Blight before it really starts."

"Please Alistair," Aedan begged as he desperately tried to grab onto his King, friend and brother. He could feel tears stinging his eyes. "Please let me."

The last thing Aedan remembered was seeing a brilliant flash of light.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

"Your majesty, you asked to see me?" Fergus asked.

"Yes Teryn Cousland, thank you for coming," Anora replied. "First may I ask how your brother fares? Has there been any improvement?"

"I looked in upon him before coming here and I am sorry to say that there has been no change. The healers told me that they expect their spells to fail soon and if Aedan has not woken before then he will die," Fergus said, the pain of losing the last of his family plain on his face.

"While I have disagreed with some of your brother's decisions I am sorry to hear he is no better and pray that he recovers," Anora said. There was no point in pretending that the Warden's decision to make Maric's bastard Alistair king over her was some trivial matter, long in the past. It was not true and anyone with half a brain would know that. She was uncertain of what to feel regarding the younger Cousland, there was still some anger but it was tempered by respect in his abilities and character and what he had accomplished. He had also forced her to face some brutal truths and had challenged the very identity she had crafted for herself.

She thought back to when Bann Teagan entered her prison in Redcliffe castle. It did not matter that it was a luxurious room and that both her handmaiden Erlina and the castle servants saw to her every whim, it was still a prison with guards at her door.

Teagan had told her that 'King' Alistair had fallen dealing the deathblow to the archdemon and ending the Blight and that Warden Cousland was lying near death. It had been so hard to keep the smile from her face. All the schemes had failed - she had outlived Cailan and the usurper Alistair and was Queen once again, this time as the sole power on the throne. At least Alistair had died killing the archdemon and not living out some foolish childhood quest for glory like poor Cailan did.

Anora and Cailan had grown up together with their marriage arranged by their fathers when they were children. Since her childhood she had grown fond of Cailan, but their marriage was more a relationship built on friendship and duty than of true love and passion. They complemented each other well and for the most part it was a happy enough life. In her own way she did love Cailan, but she was not one to shower the dead with false glory and praise. Cailan had been a popular king, his looks and nature reminding all of his beloved father, King Maric the Savior, but he was not without his flaws.

Whether in an attempt to step out from his father's shadow and carve his own legacy or from his foolish love of childhood stories of heroes Cailan had fought at Ostagar. At the front of his army he would have stood proudly, confident of victory and that life would unfold as his favourite tales did. She had attended a handful of war councils before they had all left for Ostagar and while Duncan and Loghain had disagreed over the seriousness of the threat both had warned Cailan strongly against acting rashly and underestimating the enemy. She had seen Cailan's face then and it had reminded her of when they were children and he would pretend he was a Grey Warden, a hero of legend. The boy Cailan would lead armies in mock battles that would always end with him thrusting his wooden sword into the archdemon and ending a Blight. Duncan with his warnings of a Blight had been a lure that Cailan could never have resisted.

Anora knew that her father had betrayed his king and left her husband to die, but she also knew that Cailan had also played a role in his own death. His stubborn insistence to lead from the front alongside the Grey Wardens and his refusal to listen to his advisors were as much to blame as her father.

Throughout the journey from Redcliffe to Denerim Anora had sat smugly in her carriage. The Blight was defeated and she was now again Queen, ruling alone, no longer the power behind the throne. The greatest threats to her rule now or soon to be dead. It had been common knowledge to the Landsmeet that while Cailan was King she had been the one who administered his lands and had truly ruled Ferelden.

Her smugness started to fail her when the stench of burning flesh and dead bodies carried on the air even though Denerim was nowhere in sight. More was chipped away as they neared the outskirts of Denerim and could see the stretchers and hear the screams of injured and dying men atop the blighted landscape. Whether by plan or cruel twist of fate her carriage passed near one of the great funeral pyres (she had since been told there were twenty large pyres and an uncounted number of smaller ones) that would burn continuously for almost two weeks. She watched the seemingly endless procession of dead bodies being brought for cremation, the number of dead so great that the bodies were simply piled onto the burning pyres and their ashes left to blow away in the wind. The wind had carried some of the ashes into her carriage, leaving their residue on her fine clothes and even her pretty face. In her shock at seeing the aftermath of the battle she had not even noticed.

More of Anora's smugness died when she saw the pain and grief of people who had lost a loved one: a mother, father, child, sibling or a brother in arms. As Queen she had always focused on the larger picture, the grand plan, and often overlooked the people involved. She loved her people but it was in the abstract, they were little more than numbers in a book of account. It had been Cailan who had been a man of the people while she had been removed and above them – the Warden had been right about that.

The carriage had stopped at the grouping of large tents that marked Ferelden's nobility and the leaders of the Dalish and dwarves who had fought in the battle. She attended the War Councils and learned of the terrible toll this final battle had cost Ferelden and their allies. They had taken her to a guarded tent to pay her respects to Alistair, who had been reverently cleaned and laid out in the golden armour of Ferelden Kings and was now only awaiting his final funeral rites. He looked so dignified and kingly in death, something she would never have thought about Alistair before. She had exited the tent and looked at the faces of those nearby and it was clear that they knew Alistair had died for them and they loved him for it. By that one action he was proven a King worthy of his ancestor's accomplishments.

She was led to another tent and from the people loitering around it she knew that Warden Cousland was inside. Glares that held daggers were cast at her as if she had somehow caused the death of Alistair and possible death of his fellow Warden. What was surprising to her though, was that some of those glares were from regular human soldiers with no allegiance to Cousland or the Wardens. Anora had blanched at seeing the Warden lying in his makeshift bed, his injuries displayed like some macabre freak show. It was not surprising that he hovered near death only that he still retained some spark of life.

That first night as she met her subjects and listened to their tales of the final battle the last of her smugness died. In the days that followed one would think that every soul who had fought had been atop Fort Drakon and had seen the archdemon fall at the hands of the two Grey Wardens. The stories quickly grew more outlandish, but she had heard from those she trusted who had been there and she had seen Cousland's wounds and knew that the truth of the final battle was greater and more courageous than even the wildest stories.

Anora focused herself, bringing her thoughts back to the present, and looked at Fergus Cousland across from her. Even had she not already known their relationship it was clear that he and the Warden were brothers. They were similar in looks and yet the Warden had a fire, a drive to him that Fergus seemed to be lacking. To be sure Fergus had been forced to quickly come to terms with the death of his parents, his wife and young son as his younger brother lay near death, but he seemed a broken and defeated man. If his brother died, he would return to an empty castle containing only the ghosts of all he loved and forced to put the past behind him and begin anew, if he was even able.

The Warden's words about serving her people rang in her head. She knew that by providing assistance to the Teryn she could gain a powerful ally in the Landsmeet, but now it seemed wrong to only look at that one side of the coin. She was uncertain though of what she could say that would provide some comfort. She could spew flatteries at Fergus but she wanted something honest and heartfelt.

"Your Grace...Fergus if I may speak plainly," Anora said and seeing the Teryn's nod continued. "Should you require any assistance in rebuilding your Terynir I hope that you know you can call upon me. I know that it will be difficult for you but you are a strong man and I know that you will get through this. A strong Highever under a Cousland is vital to the prosperity and security of Ferelden especially as we struggle to rebuild after the Blight. The Couslands have long been a respected and trusted voice in the Landsmeet and I would expect no less from you, my Lord. I am just as sure that the people of Highever would warmly welcome your return – your family is beloved for good reason."

"Thank you your Majesty," replied Fergus. "I will keep your kind offer in mind but until I travel to Highever I am unable to assess if aid will be required." He had always been wary about speaking with Anora and was on his best manners. Fergus had always preferred speaking with Cailan whom he had known well since they were children and with who he could truly talk plainly with. Anora had always seemed to carry an air of superiority about her even before she married Cailan and became Queen and he had avoided her whenever possible.

"I have spoken to your brother about this and I swear to the Maker that I had no knowledge of Howe's plans and would never condone such a thing. I treasured your mother as a dear friend and the murder of innocent women and children disgusts me."

"Your Majesty, I thank you for your words and accept that you had no knowledge of the attack upon my family," replied Fergus. "I would humbly ask that if you have something else to discuss we move on. The deaths of my family are not a subject I am prepared to discuss at this time. I trust you understand."

"Of course my Lord," Anora said compassionate;y. "I merely wanted it known."

"I have asked you here to let you know that I bear no grudge against the Couslands and that later I will be proclaiming your brother as Teryn of Gwaren," said Anora, pleased at the surprised look upon the Teryn's face.

"Your Majesty?" Fergus asked, unsure if he had heard her correctly.

"Yes Fergus, you heard correctly," Anora said with a slight grin on her face. "Your brother will be installed as Teryn of Gwaren. It seems somehow appropriate that my father was given Gwaren for ridding Ferelden of the Orlesians and his successor will receive it for ridding us of the Blight. I will also be granting Amaranthine to the Grey Wardens and will press for him to rule there on the Order's behalf as the new Warden Commander.

"I will not lie to you Fergus," Anora continued. "There is some politics in this decision. I am seen as a magnanimous Queen by granting such a reward to one who has openly opposed me." She gave nothing away with that admission, Fergus was raised in a powerful noble house and would easily come to the same conclusion, but there was more to her decision. "While I did not think it at the time and am still uncertain of my feelings where your brother is concerned I do not doubt that he acts in what he feels are Ferelden's best interests and that I can respect.

"Your brother is a most infuriating man. He deposed me in favour of Alistair and afterwards apologized to me while saying that he pressed my case to remain Queen married to Alistair and giving me advice on how I may best serve Ferelden in the future. All this was done while he was threatening my life and pointing out my faults as a person and a Queen as he perceived them."

_It is easy to be complementary and magnanimous to a man who I've just told you is all but dead. _Fergus thought to himself. _I wonder if the Queen would be so generous if Aedan was healthy and standing before her in the Landsmeet._

Anora did not know why she was telling Fergus these things. That final conversation with the Warden had played on her thoughts ever since it had happened and she had debated it with Erlina to no end without resolution. Here in front of her though was a man who had known the Warden all of his life and could perhaps offer insights to him.

"My brother has always had a way about him. At times he was ridiculously proper and at other times he was quite a scamp, but always with a strong sense of duty, honour and loyalty as we were raised," Fergus answered, unable to keep a smirk of remembrance from his face. "You can always count on Aedan to keep his word, fulfill his oaths and to always do what he feels is right. From speaking with his companions, I can only guess that his experiences since leaving Highever have given him wisdom beyond his years. Certainly, he has seen more than his fair share of horrors during his travels. Perhaps knowing that he was leaving to face the archdemon and quite possibly his death, Aedan decided that if he was to meet his Maker then he should do with as few regrets as possible. I know that my brother had always held Teryn Loghain in high regard and that his death would not have been easy for him, however much you may believe otherwise."

Silence stretched between them before Anora broke it to discuss the agenda for the Landsmeet. They would talk for several hours about the rebuilding of Ferelden, Highever and their goals for the future.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Leliana looked at the man lying in the bed beside her whose right hand was clasped in both of hers. It had been almost three weeks since the final battle atop Fort Drakon and still Aedan had not awakened. The healers and mages had been using every herb, potion and spell to heal and sustain him and it was a testament to their skill that her Warden had even made it this far.

Since the final battle she had sat at his side, first in a tent outside Denerim and now in a hastily cleared room in the royal palace. Leaving Aedan's side only to attend the funeral rites for Alistair before he left for the Grey Warden Headquarters in Weisshaupt, and when their friends dragged her away to eat. She had not even attended the ceremony where Anora resumed her duties as Queen now that the true King, Alistair, had fallen. If there was any justice Anora would still be locked away or she and her traitorous father would have died to save Ferelden – Alistair would still be alive and her Warden would be well and holding her in his arms.

After the bright light, like a second sun in the sky, the darkspawn had broken and the final battle was won – against all odds they had triumphed, but she had worried for her Warden, sensing that something was wrong. The bard's heart stopped beating when she saw a sombre looking Zevran telling all of their companions to follow him and to hurry. It seemed as if her heart still had not resumed beating and wouldn't again until Aedan opened his eyes.

When they arrived atop Fort Drakon, Leliana had been shocked at the destruction and the sheer number of dead littered about. Zevran told them that Alistair had struck the final blow, killing the archdemon and giving his life in the process. Leliana had been sad to learn of Alistair's death, he was a kind and gentle man and a true friend. In her opinion he would have made a fine king, but she needed to know what had become of her Warden. She was certain that had Aedan been alive Alistair would not lie dead.

"_Leliana my dear," Zevran had said softly. "Aedan is badly injured. It was his actions that felled the dragon and allowed Alistair to strike the death blow. The healers were seeing to Aedan when I left to fetch you. They don't…I am sorry my dear Leliana but they don't think he will live much longer." _

The bard's eyes scanned her Warden's chest taking in the horrific scars from the archdemon's teeth that she was told no magic could ever fully heal. Even with all of the healing that had been performed on him she could still see the mass of faint green and purple bruises across his skin; skin that glistened with sweat from a fever that refused to break. Both of his legs and his dagger-arm and most of his ribs had been broken in the final battle and though healed the mages had insisted on splinting his legs to allow the large bones to fully heal. His internal injuries likewise were also extensive and it was those that were proving the hardest to heal.

When Leliana had first seen Aedan, lying broken and bloody, atop Fort Drakon she had first thought him already dead for no man could still live with his injuries. He had not been expected to survive the night, but she knew that her Warden was a fighter and would not leave her alone. She had to believe that since Aedan had survived that the Maker himself must have some future plans for her love.

She said a silent prayer to the Maker, praying for Aedan to wake before it was too late. Wynne had came to her this morning and told her that if he did not soon wake their magic and potions would no longer be able to sustain him, and that once the magic failed his body would quickly feed on itself and he would die. They expected to cast their spells for a few more days at most before the end.

…

Fergus walked down the hall of the royal palace and all he wanted to do was run to his room, lock the door, and be alone with his thoughts. But he knew that he could not do that, he had a duty to perform and as his father was fond of saying _Couslands always do their duty_.

This had been an odd and upsetting day and he desperately wanted it to end. First the meeting with Queen Anora where she had declared that Aedan would rule Gwaren and then the Landsmeet, his first as Teryn, with the nobles who had fought in the final battle or had arrived safely afterwards to claim a share of the glory and victory, and then finally the messenger from Redcliffe.

He looked at the sealed letters in his hand, recognizing the impression of the laurel wreath that was the symbol of his family pressed into the wax. The messenger had arrived this very day bearing letters written by his brother before they had left for Denerim and the final battle against the darkspawn horde. His brother had written a letter to each of his companions, himself, Arl Eamon, Bann Teagan and a few others. Aedan had even written a letter to Morrigan, the witch who had abandoned their cause on the eve of the final battle.

When Fergus had initially seen the stack of letters he had been shocked as his brother was not one who typically wrote letters, preferring instead to speak face to face whenever possible. Clearly Aedan had much he wanted to say and Fergus knew it to be true when he had read his letter. As if they all had sensed that the letters needed to be read in private they had each wandered off to be alone as they read them.

_**Fergus,**_

_**If you are reading this letter than I am dead and you are the last Cousland and it is upon you that our family's hopes and dreams rest. With any luck I have ended my life by killing the archdemon and ending the Blight and not at the hands of some simple genlock. I am relieved to know that you somehow survived Ostagar, but sorry that I will not be there to share your burdens and help you rebuild.**_

_**By now you doubtless know that Arl Rendon Howe betrayed our father. Shortly after you left with our men for Ostagar and in the dead of night his men attacked. I am truly sorry to tell you that Oriana and Oren are both dead. I saw their bodies myself and killed the bastards who murdered them. Mother and Father are also dead. When last I saw them, father was mortally injured and mother refused to leave his side. She said she would stay by father's side "to death and beyond" and covered my escape and has surely passed. Please believe me when I say that I would have gladly given my life if it meant saving our family.**_

_**Upon the Teryn's insistence I left with Duncan for Ostagar to tell you of Howe's attack and to join the Grey Wardens. Father commanded me to do my duty to Ferelden and as you know 'A Cousland always does his duty.'**_

_**I want you to know that I avenged our family upon Howe, he died by my hand.**_

_**The family sword and shield are locked away at Soldier's Peak. Please ask either the King or Leliana who I am sure will see that you receive them. Inside this letter I have also left an amulet given me by the spirit of our father in the temple of Andraste's Ashes – I know how that sounds but I am not crazy. I can only hope that it provides you with the same comfort it has provided me.**_

_**I wish that I possessed the time and the words to tell you of the adventures I have had and the people I have met. Speak to Leliana as I am certain that she can do a better job than I ever could. I can only pray that those who travelled alongside me have survived and that you have met them. They are all good people and I would ask that you welcome them warmly and provide any assistance each may need as best you are able.**_

_**Please watch out for the King and help him when needed. Alistair is an honourable man with a kind soul and generous heart, but from childhood he has been browbeaten and told that he was unworthy and unable to lead. He is smarter than he lets on and is a quick study and will make a fine king but he will need trustworthy people around him while he learns and builds his confidence. Alistair never wanted to be king and was quite angry with me after the Landsmeet when we defeated Loghain and I named him king. I stand by my decision though, a good man who has never desired power is the best one to wield it. He is a brother in the Grey Warden's and I can only hope that in time you will also come to view Alistair as a brother as well.**_

_**I do not know where to start when the subject turns to Leliana. To say that I love her does not do justice to my feelings towards her. Feelings which I do not think even she knows the full measure of. After Highever fell and the massacre that was Ostagar I was in a dark place consumed by my pain and guilt that I had survived. I would do my duty against the Blight but I was a soulless, empty husk of a man. It was Leliana that saved me. Her love and support that kept me going when it seemed like the fate of all Thedas rested upon my shoulders and I feared I would be crushed underneath it.**_

_**Leliana will be hurting after I am gone and I ask you to care for her as you would if she were my wife. While we took no Chantry vows in my heart I swore an oath to her and I wish only for her happiness.**_

_**There is much I wish to say to you Fergus but the most important things you already know and my time is short.**_

_**Your Loving Brother,**_

_**Aedan**_

_**Let the blade pass through the flesh,**_

_**Let my blood touch the ground,**_

_**Let my cries touch their hearts. Let mine be the last sacrifice.**_

When he held the amulet aloft Fergus could see a reflection in the mirrored back. He nearly dropped it as he looked closer, seeing the smiling face of his wife Oriana in it. He held it up again and saw that his wife's visage had been replaced by his son, Oren's. Tears came unbidden to his eyes and for what seemed like hours he simply watched the mirrored back of the amulet before placing the leather thong over his head, leaving the amulet resting by his heart.

...

Leliana dimly noticed that the door to the room opened and that someone entered. She heard a whine from Aedan's mabari Elric who had also maintained a vigil outside his master's room. The poor hound was miserable ever since the healers had insisted he remain outside. It seemed that Elric had understood the mages were trying to heal Aedan and while he had relented he was not happy about it. Their companions frequently took the hound away to keep him company and he guarded the door whenever she left the room or was asleep.

She felt a hand on her shoulder and looked up to see Fergus Cousland, Aedan's brother. One could easily tell the two were brothers just by looking at them. Both shared many of the same features, a strong jaw, broad shoulders, and even the same nose. They shared similar mannerisms and build though Fergus was a little stockier than Aedan who was all lean muscle. Once you got to know them the similarities were even more pronounced. They both were honourable and dutiful and had a deep love of family and friends.

Fergus was thought lost after Ostagar and had been rescued by the Chasind after being badly wounded. He had emerged from the Korcari Wilds to hear the stories of Arl Howe's betrayal and the deaths of all those he loved. He had joined the men of Waking Sea, whose Bann had long been a friend to his family, to fight the darkspawn. It had only been after the final battle that Bann Alfstanna had recognized Fergus amongst her men and told him that Aedan was the Grey Warden who had led the battle.

"Has there been any change?" Fergus asked.

"No, your Grace but I have faith that he will soon wake," Leliana answered with absolute certainty. "Aedan is a fighter and he won't leave us."

Fergus looked into the bard's eyes and she almost convinced him. She had been crying and looked weary with dark circles under her eyes from maintaining her near constant vigil, but she spoke with such confidence and faith. In truth he was growing more pessimistic each day that his brother would wake. The fatalistic tone of the letter Aedan had written him didn't help either.

"Will you pray with me your Grace?" Leliana asked.

Fergus knelt down beside the bard and together they prayed. After they had finished they each took one of the two chairs in the room with Leliana again taking up Aedan's hand in hers. If Fergus had any initial doubts that the pretty bard shared his brother's feelings the time he had spent with her as she sat by Aedan's side left none. He debated whether to deliver the letters in his hand, wondering whether it would provide comfort or despair. His choice made he continued.

"A messenger arrived today from Redcliffe. It seems my brother had written letters before he left for Denerim." Fergus watched Leliana's eyes go wide with surprise. "There is a letter for you and I have another for Morrigan which since she fled the fight no one is certain what to do with."

Quicker than Fergus could have imagined the witch's letter was snatched from his hand and Leliana was on her feet and by the fireplace. He could see that she was tempted to toss Morrigan's letter into the flames. Just as quickly she was back sitting in the chair beside him. He looked at her questioningly.

"Aedan wrote these words for her and while she doesn't deserve them I will not go against his wishes," she said and then placed the letter on the small bedside table. "Though I do not understand what he could possibly have to say to that witch."

Not knowing what to say Fergus simply agreed. "Here is your letter. I will give you some privacy since if it is like mine I wouldn't want to intrude."

"Thank you your Grace."

"Please Leliana call me Fergus," he said as he rose from his chair and headed to the door.

Leliana watched Fergus close the door behind him before she broke the wax seal and opened her letter.

_**To my bard Leliana,**_

_**As I write this, my last and most difficult letter of this night, I am sitting at the small desk in our room here in Redcliffe castle. I have spent Maker knows how long just watching you sleep and wondering what to write. I am physically tired from our earlier 'constitutional' as you sometimes call it, but my spirit is full of life and my heart near bursting just from being near you. I cannot put into words how deeply I love you, my beautiful bard. You have saved the broken man that left Highever with your love and support and I will be forever grateful. **_

_**If you are reading this letter than I am dead and I must ask for your solemn vow that you will keep what follows in the strictest confidence and that you burn this letter once read.**_

_**If my death was required then I can only pray that it was in killing the archdemon as that is truly why Grey Wardens are needed. The Grey Wardens are joined to the darkspawn and the Warden who strikes the fatal blow gives his very soul to defeat the archdemon and end the Blight. Riordan has said that as senior Warden the responsibility falls to him, but now that I again have something to lose I cannot help but worry that it will fall to me. There are only three Wardens in all of Ferelden and I will not let Alistair be the one to sacrifice himself. If it falls to me I will gladly give my life to ensure your safety my love and also to ensure that the safety of my nation lies in the hands of one who is as much my brother as Fergus.**_

_**I must also thank you my bard for arriving in our room tonight when you did. Morrigan had come to see me before you arrived with an offer and while I had declined my resolve was weakening. Morrigan knew that a Grey Warden would die killing the archdemon and offered me a way out; a ritual from cursed Flemeth. This ritual would require a Warden to lay with the witch, from which a child would be conceived. This child would then accept the soul of the Old God that is freed when the archdemon dies leaving the Warden alive. I did not speak to Alistair of Morrigan's offer and I ask that you keep it in confidence and never tell him. I only tell you so that you know it was necessary for a Warden to die at the end. Even to spend the rest of my days with you my bard I could not allow Morrigan to raise a child with the soul and power of an Old God. More importantly, though we have never formally committed to each other, in my heart I have sworn vows to you and know that there is no other for me. I will not betray my vows to you even if it means my death. **_

_**I ask both you and Alistair to find my brother Fergus and if he still lives return to him the Cousland family sword and shield stored at Soldier's Peak and help him rebuild Highever. I have written him a letter as well that I ask you please deliver. Fergus has lost much and I would take it as a kindness if you would look in on him from time to time and ensure that he does not dwell on his grief and eventually moves on with his life. I make this same request of you too my bard. If I am dead I have faced the Maker knowing that you still live, and that is what I would wish for you – to live a life full of happiness. One day we will see each other again in the Fade but for your sake I hope it is far in the future.**_

_**Once we reach Denerim I will endeavour to arrange things so that you are protected and away from the heart of the fighting and for that I ask you to forgive me. This is not because I doubt your skill or courage, but because I doubt mine. If I am called upon to take the final blow and I see you, I fear that I may waver and that cannot be allowed. Too much is riding upon the battle for Denerim.**_

_**Knowing you my dear bard I ask that you dry your eyes - You are not Alindra and your tears will not take you to me, but one day I promise we will be reunited.**_

_**Until we meet again know that I love you always.**_

_**Forever Your Warden,**_

_**Aedan**_

_**Let the blade pass through the flesh,**_

_**Let my blood touch the ground,**_

_**Let my cries touch their hearts. Let mine be the last sacrifice.**_

Through her tears Leliana read through the letter a second time absorbing every detail of it and squaring it with her memories. At the moment she didn't know if she wanted Aedan to wake so she could kiss him or to wake so that she could beat him back into senselessness. That last night in Redcliffe when she had found him alone in the room they shared he had been crying. She had only seen Aedan cry once before when he had told her of his final night in Highever and the deaths of his family. It had unnerved her, but Aedan convinced her that it was only stress brought on by the upcoming battle and the pressures of command. Never had she dreamed of Morrigan's ritual or that even then he was arranging things for if he was called upon to meet his end.

They had made love that night with such passion and need, both of them embracing life in face of the coming battle and their possible deaths. Now she realized how much more likely death had been for one of them.

She had already determined that the Warden that struck the final blow on the archdemon did so at the cost of his life. Zevran had overheard the final conversation between the two Wardens with Aedan begging Alistair to allow him to take the final blow. While injured, Alistair's wounds alone were not sufficient to cause his death and so it could only have been something to do with slaying the archdemon. She thanked Alistair in her thoughts and in her prayers for saving the man she loved, but a little nagging doubt whispered to her that if Aedan died anyways Alistair had thrown his life away for nothing.

Tears continued to fall from the bard's eyes and she leaned over her Warden and gently kissed his lips.

"Please Aedan my love, you must wake up and come back to me. Fergus is here with me and we both miss you. I need you my Warden, please come back to me."

Leliana couldn't bring herself to burn the letter. Aedan had bared his heart and soul to her in it. She folded the vellum and tucked it into her breeches. She fell asleep draped across her Warden's chest.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

The fog that clouded Aedan's thoughts started to clear. He opened his eyes but quickly shut them again, the light was so bright that it physically pained him. He was already so sore and in such pain that he didn't need to borrow more. He could feel a weight on his chest that hurt him and made it uncomfortable to breathe.

He opened his eyes a sliver and, after becoming accustomed to the light, gradually opened them wide and raised his head from the pillow he could feel behind him. The light that originally was so bright as to hurt him was merely two candles and the burning embers in the fireplace he could just see to his left. He scanned the room, not recognizing where he was or how he got here. It was only when he saw the familiar red hair resting upon his bare chest that he no longer cared where he was. His bard was with him and for now that was enough.

He raised his left hand to stroke her fiery red hair. It took a few moments for his hand to accept its subservience to his will. Aedan meant to gently run his fingers through her hair, but instead he actually poked Leliana in the head and judging by the tingle running up from his digits rather hard.

The bard, startled at being woken by a poke to the head, leapt up from the Warden's chest, her right hand instinctively reaching for the dagger she kept at her waist. She scanned the room and saw that it was her Warden's hand that had poked her and looked to see Aedan's piercing eyes staring back into hers.

Aedan tried to apologize for waking Leliana however the sound that came out his mouth sounded like a frog's croak.

Leliana quickly kissed Aedan and then started talking to him in rapid-fire, not even pausing to take a breath.

"Aedan, how are feeling? I can't tell you how worried I've been, you've been asleep for so long. You are never to do such a thing to me again..."

The Warden croaked at his bard again.

"Give me a moment. I'll be back with Wynne and some water for your throat," Leliana said, and her smile touched her pretty blue eyes. She ran down the hall and found Wynne and told her the good news. She looked for Fergus but he was away from the Palace, she left word with a servant to notify the Chamberlain that Fergus needed to go to his brother's room when he returned.

It was only a few minutes later when the Warden's room was suddenly far too small to accommodate the number of people within it. Aedan petted his hound that must have come in with the others as he had not seen Elric earlier and he smiled at his friends.

Wynne was standing right beside his bed, asking how he was feeling. He croaked at the elder mage too. Aedan could see red hair pushing gently towards him, she moved beside his head and placed a glass to his lips. Leliana gently raised the glass, giving him a small sip, and the water that entered his mouth seemed to be absorbed instantly. No drink he had ever had before had tasted so good. She gave him another small sip and it seemed to reach part way down his throat before it too was absorbed.

"Be careful Leliana and not give him too much. It will only make him sick," said Wynne.

Aedan tried to say 'thank you' and it was almost recognizable as words.

"Please everyone give us some privacy so that Leliana and I may see to his needs. I will call for you in a few minutes," said Wynne. It was an order spoken as a request.

Any thoughts of disagreement were quickly erased by Leliana's fierce glare. The sweet, pious and fun-loving bard looked overtly dangerous and the crowd quickly dispersed.

Aedan took another small sip of water. He was thirsty and hungry but he remembered Wynne's admonishment from moments ago.

"Now young man, how are you feeling," Wynne asked.

"The battle, how did it end?" Aedan asked, his voice scratchy and little more than a whisper.

Leliana took a deep breath as if to brace herself before answering her Warden. "Alistair killed the archdemon." She could see Aedan deflate before her and his face became twisted in pain and regret. "Zevran and Sten both say that you stabbed the archdemon's eye and it threw you up in the air before catching you in its teeth." She gestured for her Warden to look at his chest and the scars across it. "You kept fighting though and stabbed the dragon through its muzzle. I'm told you were a hands-width away for striking its brain and killing it instantly. In its pain the archdemon spat you out and you dropped to the ground breaking both of your legs. They weren't sure when you broke your arm.

"The damage you did was enough to fell the dragon and Alistair ended it, severing its head. With the archdemon dead the darkspawn became disorganized and were routed, though soldiers are still patrolling the city and surrounding countryside killing the stragglers.

"It has been eighteen days since the archdemon was defeated and this is the first time you have opened your eyes. You have been kept alive by magic and potions and the mages told me only yesterday that if you were not awake soon their magic would soon fail and you would die."

"But Alistair, he was the king. He was never to take the final blow. It should have been me," Aedan said regretfully. He closed his eyes from the pain of the loss of his friend and king.

Leliana was incensed and she slapped the Warden hard across his face. Wynne could only stare in amazement, too shocked and unsure of what to do next.

"Don't you dare say that to me! Don't you dare! I have sat at your side ever since Zevran came and got me. For eighteen days I have lived in fear and watched as the man I was love hovered between life and death, no one knowing which side would prevail. You dare tell me that our efforts have been wasted and would dishonour Alistair's sacrifice." Leliana was very nearly screaming at Aedan and her Orlesian accent grew thick as her anger took hold.

"Wynne, leave us," Leliana commanded the elder mage. "Please ward the door to ensure both our privacy and that we will not be interrupted."

Wynne hesitated unsure of whether it was safe to leave the Warden locked in a room with the bard whose temper was burning so hotly.

"Do it please," Leliana again commanded. Her tone so compelling that Wynne had already moved to obey before realizing it.

Aedan could only feel the sting of Leliana's slap as he watched Wynne leave the room. Moments later the door glowed blue and then faded.

"Leliana, please let me explain," said Aedan.

"Explain what? How you wished kill the archdemon and claim all of the glory?" Leliana snapped at him and she could see Aedan's face quickly turn to disgust.

"Or perhaps the one who kills the archdemon dies in doing so?" Leliana said softly as she pulled out the letter he had written her from her breeches and showed it to him. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I am sorry my love. I wanted to tell you but I was bound by my oaths to the Grey Wardens." Aedan reached out for her hand and bade his bard to sit down. "Alistair and I only found out the true reason why Wardens were needed to end the Blight from Riordan just that last night in Redcliffe."

"Morrigan - what you wrote of her?" A little hint of anger and possibly jealousy entered Leliana's voice.

"What I wrote was true. Would her ritual have worked? I don't know." Aedan's voice broke on the last words.

"You should have done it, her ritual. If it meant that no Grey Warden would die, you should have done it." Leliana hated herself for saying the words but she knew Aedan regretted Alistair's loss.

"In war, victory. In peace, vigilance. In death, sacrifice," Aedan said the tenet of the Grey Wardens. "If it was to save your life, I would have done it. I would have hated myself, but I would have done it.

"Riordan had already said that as senior Warden he intended to strike the death blow and so possibly there was no need for her ritual. I just couldn't lay with Morrigan to save my life. I couldn't betray you even if you never knew. I couldn't ask Alistair and even if I did he would never agree. And Morrigan raising a child with the soul and power of an Old God." Aedan shook his head at the thought of it. He motioned for the glass of water and took another sip.

"So the truth of why she travelled with us was finally revealed. Did she leave or did you...?" Leliana asked, her arched eyebrow finishing her sentence.

"She left peacefully when I declined her offer and refused to speak of it to Alistair. While the ritual may have been Flemeth's reason for sending Morrigan with Alistair and me, I don't think it was hers. During our travels you have to admit that there were many times when she proved invaluable and became a trusted companion."

Leliana grudgingly nodded her head.

"I know that travelling with us changed Morrigan," Aedan declared. "She was not the same woman who left the Wilds and journeyed with us to Lothering; even Alistair would agree with me on that. Morrigan saw the world outside the Wilds and away from her mother. She shared our lives as we shared hers and we all became friends, like a family. People looked upon her as a hero, had faith in her, and respected her. She was not some swamp witch to be feared.

"Morrigan journeyed with us for over a year and she changed dramatically, but Flemeth had many more years to put her poison into her. If you could have seen her that night in Redcliffe, I truly don't think the ritual was about the god-child. I honestly think she did not want to see either Alistair or I fall and she thought the ritual was the answer. She couldn't understand why I would refuse it. Morrigan was so furious with me, she reminded me of a small frightened child."

Leliana looked at Aedan sceptically. While it was true that had Morrigan had changed since she first met her, it was hard to form an image of her as a scared little girl.

"And Alistair?" she asked.

"I begged him to let me take the final blow. I knew I was badly injured and dying. If one of us had to die to kill the archdemon then why not the one who was nearly there anyway? Maybe he was just afraid of being king?" As soon as those last words had left his mouth Aedan was ashamed of himself. "I'm sorry, Alistair is better than that and I know it. He would have made a fine king."

"Alistair _was_ a good king and he will be missed by those who knew and loved him," Leliana said as she squeezed Aedan's hand. "I honour his life and his death and I will never forget him. He took the final strike and gave me a second chance with my Warden." Leliana raised Aedan's hand to her cheek and then kissed it.

Alistair had given them both a second chance by slaying the archdemon, and while Aedan would forever be grateful to him his death would take a long time to come to terms with. In his heart he knew that Alistair would never have performed the ritual with Morrigan for himself. He _might_ have done it to ensure Aedan survived and would return to Leliana, but he would have hated himself for it and Aedan would hate himself for trapping his friend and forcing his agreement. Eventually it would have strained their friendship too much and driven them apart, to say nothing of the looming threat of the child hanging over them.

"Believe me when I say that I did not want to die and leave you my beautiful bard. Refusing Morrigan and the safety she offered was one of the hardest things I ever had to do," Aedan said.

They sat for a while, neither saying anything before Leliana rose from her chair.

"I will tell Wynne that she can come back in now," Leliana said.

"She'll come in eventually on her own," Aedan said, refusing to let go of Leliana's hand. "Please will you just lie down beside me until we're disturbed?"

"But...I don't want to hurt you."

"Having you beside me will do more than any healer could."

Leliana carefully got into the bed beside Aedan, lying on her side, facing him. She ran her right hand along his chest, tracing the fresh scars that showed how near she had come to losing him. Tears fell from her eyes.

"Leliana, how did you get my letter?" he asked.

"A messenger arrived from Redcliffe yesterday with them," she answered.

"Did everyone get one? Read it?"

"I believe so, yes," Leliana said.

Those letters were only to be delivered _if_ he died. He still had to face those people. Aedan's profane curses were silenced when the bard kissed him.


	6. Chapter 6

_A/N: I corrected the date on Chapter One it should have been 9:31 Dragon not 9:30_

* * *

Chapter Six

6 Drakonis, 9:32 Dragon

Highever – six months after the end of the Fifth Blight

Aedan thanked his opponent for the match and then stepped towards the fence lining the practice area of Highever castle. Ser Richard had been a newly christened knight when he had left for Ostagar and was one of the few to have survived and had returned to Highever and his family after the massacre there. Richard had returned to Highever to find the late Arl Howe had seized the castle and murdered the Cousland family. When news of Howe's death reached Highever he had been among the leaders who had fought back against their oppressors and had driven them out.

"Thank you for the lesson your Grace...Aedan," Richard said as he rotated his shoulder to relieve some of the stiffness there. The Teryn of Gwaren and future Warden Commander of Ferelden was adamant that in the practice area he was not to be addressed by any title, fearing that if his opponent saw him as a Teryn that he wouldn't put forth his best effort. Aedan had parried the knight's sword, catching it on the cross-guard, and used Richard's own momentum to put him off balance and out of position for when the Teryn spun and connected with a heavy crosswise chop to his shoulder that had driven him to the ground.

"You are welcome Ser Richard," Aedan said. "You are very good but you must remain calm and not allow your anger or embarrassment to take hold – that is how you make little mistakes that leave you off-balance and exposed. On the practice field there is no shame in taking a few bumps and bruises, we all do. But we must learn from our mistakes so that we don't repeat them and better here among friends than on the battlefield." Aedan looked at the young knight, only a few years his senior in age but decades younger in experience, and could see the lesson take hold. He decided to boost Richard's confidence, "I've also yet to meet the bandit or darkspawn who will buy an opponent a pint of Master Tomas' ale as I will for you this evening in honour of your skill."

Aedan knew that it was hard for young men full of confidence to lose even a sparring match. During the Blight when he had first sparred with Sten and then Zevran, Aedan had been furious with himself over how handily he was thrashed. Each of their fighting styles so unusual and different from what he had trained against. It took him some time to realize that those beatings had been a blessing. While not a braggart, he had needed to be humbled, to lose some of his confidence and faith in his abilities, so that he could learn from them and improve. Brick by brick he was torn down only to rebuild himself stronger than he was before - still confident in his abilities, but more open-minded and with a greater respect of his opponent. This is what he was hoping to do with Ser Richard and the soldiers of Highever and eventually with the Grey Wardens.

Aedan had heard from Fergus that the men of Highever were now taking bets as to who might defeat him in a match now that he had recovered from his injuries. It had been a slow, painful process but apart from tiring a little too easily he had physically recovered from his wounds at the hands, or rather teeth to be specific, of the archdemon. He still struggled with the loss of Alistair, his brother Warden and King, but that too was healing with the help of his bard and the knowledge that Alistair had died as he lived, being a Grey Warden and protecting others.

The Warden lingered around the practice area, offering some advice and sharing his insights, before heading towards the castle proper with Elric in tow.

It was a surprisingly warm spring day, coming after a very mild winter with very little snow. It was as if the Maker knew that Ferelden needed desperately to repair and rebuild after the devastation caused by the Blight and had held winter back. The mild weather had allowed for nearly all of the repairs of the town of Highever and the castle to be completed. It had also enabled Aedan to push himself in his recovery and training.

Queen Anora had been true to her word and had summoned the Orlesian Wardens after they had left for the final battle. There were twenty Wardens housed at Vigil's Keep in Amaranthine and they had also been actively recruiting. Though as Aedan understood it there was no shortage of volunteers as the Order had become quite popular since the defeat of the archdemon.

About five months ago the delegation of Grey Wardens had arrived in Highever to speak to Aedan. At the time he had been walking badly and with two canes like an old man. They had been sceptical that he would ever be able to accept his duties as Warden Commander of Ferelden, but Wynne and others from the Circle of Magi had reassured them. The mages seemed to think that he had lingered near death and was so slow in recovering, despite their healing, due to the large quantities of the archdemon's blood and spit that had entered his body through his wounds and mouth. Aedan never told them of the Warden's Joining ritual and that he already had a trace of an archdemon's blood flowing in his veins. It was somewhat ironic that the taint might have saved his life even as it was slowly killing him. The mages warned him that there might be other effects and for a time he had allowed Wynne and a few others she trusted to 'experiment' on him, but that ended once he could safely get out of bed and move under his own power.

He knew that now he was recovered that he would soon have to leave Highever for Amaranthine and take up his duties there as Warden Commander. At some point he would also have to visit Gwaren, the Terynir granted to him by Anora. He still could not understand why she had done so. A cynic might say that Anora granted Gwaren to him to curry favour with the Landsmeet who had deposed her. Ferelden had decided against her rule and she would have to endear herself and prove herself worthy to the Landsmeet despite or in spite of her and her father's past deeds. The Queen was not in a position to carry grudges and an easy way to show that she did not was to grant her father's Terynir to his executioner. Since at the time Aedan was expected to die and was without an heir there was little enough risk. Besides even though he lived he was still a Grey Warden and they were not known for dying in their sleep. He had spoken to Anora a few times prior to leaving Denerim and she had sent him a couple of letters inquiring as to his health and all were surprisingly civil enough that he hoped the cynic was not right.

Aedan entered the castle and made his way to the kitchen for something to eat, the true measure of his recovery had been the return of his appetite.

"Good Morning Rosie, how are you this morning?" Aedan asked Rosalyn, Rosie to her friends, the head cook for the castle.

"Very well, thank you Your Grace. And you?" replied Rosie as she set out a bowl of porridge for the Warden and some scraps for Elric. It was long past the point where she was surprised to see him and his hound come to the kitchen looking for food at all hours of the day.

"I actually feel very good, no soreness from practice just looking for something to do. Do you need some help in the kitchens?"

"Maker no your Grace, we can't have that."

"I will have you know Rosie that during my travels I easily became the fourth worst cook amongst my friends and never poisoned anyone," Aedan said proudly as he puffed out his chest. "That is if you include my mabari and Shale the stone golem who didn't eat," he laughed.

"Where is Lady Leliana, Your Grace?" asked Rosie. The Warden and bard were rarely apart from each other for long and there were rumours around the castle that they would wed despite the outrage it would cause. Leliana was well liked by the men and women of Highever, but others only saw that she spoke with an Orlesian accent and as far as they knew was not noble born.

"She is visiting with Mother Elizabeth and some distinguished Chantry visitors in town."

"Is there some event that the castle should be planning for?" Rosie arched her eyebrows knowingly.

Aedan could feel his face flush. "Perhaps one day but no there is nothing that I am aware of."

The Warden quickly finished his porridge and excused himself. He was embarrassed that he was so obvious where his bard was concerned.

...

Aedan whiled away the rest of the morning and part of the afternoon before Leliana found him in Fergus' study. The bard sat down in the chair across from him.

"And how was your visit with Mother Elizabeth?" Aedan asked.

"It went well I suppose," Leliana said, looking past Aedan as if there was something more to discuss. After a few moments of silence she continued. "Brother Genitivi and some other Chantry scholars were there. They would like me to accompany them to Haven and the Temple of Andraste since I am one of the few who has seen the Urn of Sacred Ashes. The Grand Cleric herself has written me asking for my assistance." She withdrew the letter from a pocket on her dress and passed it over for the Warden to read.

He read the letter and then looked across at the pretty face he knew so well. It was clear that she was torn. Leliana was a pious woman, who would always be grateful to the Chantry for aiding her at a time when she needed it most. She wanted to go back to the temple, in part to settle a form of debt she felt she owed the Chantry, but she did not want to leave him.

"I've been cooped up in the castle all day and I expect you feel the same too," Aedan said as he handed back the letter. "What do you say if you go and change into some travelling clothes and we go for a little adventure? While you're getting dressed I can get the horses ready." Leliana smiled and nodded agreement.

After he spoke to the stable boy to prepare two horses Aedan went back to the castle to inform Seneschal Garret that he and Leliana would be going for a ride and should be expected back that evening. He left instructions to inform Fergus when he returned from Harper's Ford.

"My Lady you are packed rather heavy for a short ride," Aedan commented. Leliana was certainly dressed for travel. She wore a pair of brown buckskin trousers with matching jacket along with a green linen tunic. She carried a pack with a bedroll and wolf fur cloak attached in one hand. In the other was her bow and quiver and her short sword hung from her hip. He knew that there would also be daggers in her boots, sleeves and on her hip opposite her sword at a minimum.

"I have learned when travelling with you my Warden that it is best to be prepared for anything," Leliana said with a grin.

The Warden bowed in an admission of the truth of her words and pointed to his own pack lying beside Elric that was similarly equipped.

They rode for hours without a destination in mind with Elric keeping pace. On their way back to the castle Aedan decided to steer their course towards a spot known as Promontory Point. It was a very scenic place, jutting out into the Waking Sea and high above the rocky coast of Ferelden. From here you could see Highever off to the east and get a good look at the fishing and trading boats travelling to and from the town's sizable docks. The point was also a popular spot for knowledgeable locals when travelling and unable to reach the town before nightfall. These travellers had over time built the spot up and made it a welcoming place to spend the evening. Several fallen trees and large boulders were arranged as seating around a small ring of stones for a fire pit. There was even a small paddock of sorts formed by a combination of bushes with sharp thorns and wooden fence for their horses. Nearby there was a small stream that emptied back into the sea with an impressive waterfall and there were plenty of grasses and bushes to provide some food for both man and animal.

Aedan got down from his horse as Leliana did the same. He led the horses over to nearby paddock and let them roam. He walked over to Leliana who was standing at the cliff's edge admiring the view. He stood behind her and wrapped his arms around her delicate waist and placed his chin on her shoulder.

"The view is spectacular. Thank you for bringing me here," the bard said as her left hand came up and touched the Warden's cheek.

"The view pales in comparison to the woman in my arms."

"Flatterer." The bard gave him a playful slap.

"Not at all my beautiful bard, merely stating the truth," Aedan said as he kissed her cheek.

They stood together in silence, enjoying the view and each other's company for some time before the Warden spoke. "I think we should rest here for a while. I'll go collect some water and enough wood for a small fire."

Aedan returned after fetching the water with his arms full of wood to find that Leliana had setup a small tent and was brushing the horses after removing their saddles.

"I hadn't intended us to spend the night out here my love."

"I know it's just so beautiful here and we have it all to ourselves." Elric barked at the slight and received a pat of apology from Leliana.

"They'll be expecting us back at the castle tonight," Aedan said.

"I told Ser Garret that we might not be returning this evening," the bard smiled.

The Warden got the fire going and then laid his cloak over one of the boulders and retrieved a cloth wrapped bundle from his pack containing some bread, dried meat and apples. He watched Leliana brush her horse, admiring her form. She noticed and began to blush.

"It isn't polite to stare Aedan."

"I wasn't staring. I was appreciating one of the Makers finest creations...that really is a beautiful horse, so powerful and majestic. All lean muscle and grace." Leliana threw the horse brush at him as he began laughing.

They had a simple meal, sharing the meat with Elric and the apples with the horses. After they had finished eating they moved to the cliff's edge to watch the sun set, sitting down on one cloak and wrapping another around them to take the bite out of the chill wind that had arrived.

"Leliana," Aedan said quietly. "I think that you should go to Andraste's temple with Brother Genitivi and the others."

"You want me to leave?" Leliana said.

"Never," he answered. The look of confusion and pain on his bard's face tore at his heart. "These last few months with you have been among the best of my life. I only wish my parents were alive to meet you."

"I don't understand then, why do you want me to leave?" Leliana looked close to tears.

"I saw your eyes and know that you want to go," said the Warden. "They will need your skills and I know that it is important to you. I would never want to hold you so tightly that your own wants and needs are suppressed and you suffocate. That is not the woman I fell in love with.

"I have another reason for wanting you to go," Aedan said hesitantly. "If we are going to continue and build a future together then I owe it to you to tell you the entire truth. A trip to Haven will give you time to think whether you even want to see me again."

"You're scaring me Aedan." Concern showed on the bard's pretty face.

"Perhaps that is for the best," Aedan said ruefully. "I am going to break my oaths to the Grey Wardens by telling you this so please do not speak of it to anyone, not even to Fergus since he doesn't know.

"You've travelled with Alistair and me for long enough to know that Wardens can sense the darkspawn. You also know that a Warden gives their life to kill an archdemon." Aedan watched Leliana nod before looking out at the sea, unable to face her when he told her the truth. "When a Grey Warden recruit is inducted into the Order he goes through a ritual called the Joining. In the Joining the recruit drinks a mixture of darkspawn and archdemon blood." He heard Leliana gasp in shock and disgust. "We take their darkness, their taint into us and master it and that is what gives us our power. It allows us to sense when darkspawn are near just as they can sense us, and the shared taint is why only a Warden can kill an archdemon. We are bound to them.

"Not every recruit survives the Joining, during mine I was the only one to survive." Aedan paused as memories of Daveth and Jory sprang to mind. "I drank the blood and now the darkspawn taint flows in my veins.

"The taint makes me immune to the darkspawn, but it is a poison and is slowly killing me. If I don't die an early death I will live for another thirty years or so before the taint claims its victory. As my time nears I will begin to have terrible nightmares and will leave for my Calling. That is when a Warden goes to the Deep Roads to die fighting darkspawn. If I do not leave for my Calling the taint will corrupt me. I will turn into a ghoul and someone will be forced to kill me because I will truly be a monster and deserving of death.

"There is another thing. We have never talked in detail about our future together. Would you want to marry and do you want children? I must warn you that because of the taint it is unlikely that I could ever father a child." Aedan turned to face Leliana. She was crying and he reached out and touched her face with both hands, wiping away her tears with his thumbs. "Please Leliana don't cry. We both know that Wardens are needed and that the sacrifice, while painful, is necessary." He lowered his forehead to hers.

"That is the life I can offer you," he whispered. "A childless life filled with fighting darkspawn and an early death." He began to stand and Leliana grabbed his hand.

"You can also give me a life filled with love and happiness regardless of however long it lasts," she said pleadingly.

"Please my beautiful bard, do not rush into a hasty decision," Aedan said. "I beg you to go to Haven and take the time to really think upon the life I can offer you. I love you Leliana, but I only want what is best for you. If you decide that I can't give you everything you want and deserve then I will understand."

Aedan gently removed the bard's hand from his and began to walk away from the camp. Tears ran down his face and he could hear Leliana's sobs. He had left a piece of his heart there on the cliff, but it had to be done – Leliana had to know the truth, he loved her too much to lie to her.

He wasn't sure how long he had wandered aimlessly before he paused. Night had truly fallen and without his cloak the wind was now chilling his bones, he decided to walk back to camp.

Aedan entered the tent to see that Leliana appeared to be sleeping. Appeared since the bard was so skilful there was no easy way to tell for sure. He pulled his bedroll away from hers. It just seemed wrong to sleep so close beside her after what he had said earlier. The Warden laid down to sleep not even bothering to undress.

He awoke the next morning to an empty tent. Leliana was already awake and had packed her bedroll. He did the same and then walked out into the morning air and, after seeing the bard again sitting on the cliff's edge looking out as the sun rose over the sea, began to tear down the tent and pack it up. After a quick look to see the horses had been tended to he walked over to his bard and sat down beside her.

"Good morning," he said with forced cheer.

"Morning," Leliana answered flatly. "I have thought about what you told me and I have decided to go to Haven on the Chantry's expedition. It is true that I would like to return and there is some sense in them bringing someone who has already passed through the Gauntlet."

"Thank you..." Aedan said.

"Please let me finish," Leliana interrupted. "As for our future together, I will do as you ask and think upon what you have said. You wrote in your letter to me before we left to face the archdemon that you had sworn vows to me and that for you there was no other." She saw Aedan nod his head. "I release you from your vows. It is only fair if you are granting me time to determine whether there is another for my heart that you are granted the same."

Leliana looked at her Warden. The strong jaw and handsome face that set many heart's swooning, the broad shoulders and muscular arms that seemed as if he could carry the world upon his back, the rough, calloused hands that were so gentle and tender when they made love, and the piercing blue eyes that seemed to look into your very soul and reflected his strength and inner depths of character. She knew that Aedan was hurting himself by asking her to leave and freeing her to find another if that was what she wanted. Could she do any less?

"What will you do?" the bard asked.

"I will go to Vigil's Keep and the Wardens," Aedan said. He left unspoken the rest - _with you gone __there is nothing for me in Highever._


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

30 Solace, 9:32 Dragon

Arling of Amarnathine

Warden Commander Aedan Cousland stood just outside the gates to the City of Amaranthine and over the carcass of the last darkspawn, a giant armoured ogre. One week of brutal fighting against overwhelming odds had finally ended and they were victorious. Or at least of victorious as one could be when the jewel of the Arling lay in ruins with Maker knows how many dead laying strewn across the ground, both inside and outside its walls. It was enough to break his heart. Whatever victory they had achieved here could still all be for not if Vigil's Keep and the remaining Wardens and troops there had fallen. He pulled his swords, Starfang and Vigilance, from the corpse, shook the blood off and set them into their scabbards. He stopped to look around and see who else had survived when he noticed the defenders of Amaranthine were cheering.

"Constable Aiden!" he yelled. The Constable had been nearby before he had separated to face the armoured ogre.

"Right here Warden Commander," the constable said after hurrying over.

"Send a messenger to Vigil's Keep to see how it fares, but order the man to be careful and not throw his life away. Also, send messengers to the Teryn of Highever and to Queen Anora to apprise them of the situation here and to ask for them to send troops to kill any stragglers and help maintain order. Also inform them that Vigil's Keep has also fallen under attack and at present we have received no word. Troops from Denerim would be best situated to render them aid while Highever's men can reach the city quicker. The messengers are to leave immediately and with all possible haste. If they have to commandeer horses I will personally reimburse the owners for twice their market value.

"My fellow Warden's and I will need to see healers before we leave," the Warden Commander said.

"Leave for where Commander?" asked the constable.

"With the forces the Mother threw at us here and if we assume an equal or even greater number at the Vigil there cannot be many left protecting her lair," said the Commander. "We will invade their lair and kill the Mother before she can replenish her numbers.

"That is suicide Commander. You need the forces from Vigil's Keep," Constable Aiden said emphatically.

"Darkspawn do not reproduce as humans do Constable. There will never be a better time to end this and what forces we have are needed here to guard against another attack and see to the survivors. Tell the men to burn every darkspawn they find and warn them against their blood, it is poison – they must wear gloves. Now go and see to the messengers and I will look for some healers. You are in charge here Constable until relieved by either myself or Teryn Cousland." Aedan left the constable and walked over to Sigrun who he could see was tending to a wounded soldier.

He looked at Sigrun, the irrepressibly chipper dwarven Warden and member of the Legion of the Dead who even in the midst of all this death and destruction was like a ray of sunshine. In that way she reminded him of his bard Leliana. Oh how he missed her, but at least she was in Haven, safe and away from this. Likewise his hound Elric was safe in Highever, doing his duty and helping to re-establish the Cousland kennels decimated by the late Arl Howe.

"How is it going Soldier?" the Commander asked as he knelt down beside the wounded man. He took stock of the man's wounds. He was coughing up blood and it seemed that Sigrun was holding back his insides from spilling out. "We need a healer NOW!" he yelled as he reached for a health poultice at his belt. He pulled out the cork and poured some down the soldier's throat and some more onto his injured stomach.

A healer arrived soon after and began ministering to the injured soldier. Aedan stood up to find his other Wardens, Nathaniel Howe, son of his family's betrayer, and Velanna the Dalish mage.

"Sigrun wait here while I find Nathaniel and Velanna. We will be leaving for the Mother's lair shortly so get healed and take whatever rest you can because our fight isn't over yet," the Commander said.

It took several hours before they were all healed and as ready to go as a group of four Wardens could be when going to face an unknown number of enemies after having fought a terrible week long battle.

...

The Warden Commander hacked at the giant tentacle in front of him that protected the Mother as out of the corner of his eye he saw a flaming arrow go by. A loud unholy scream rang out, clearly heard over the sound of battle. Nathaniel must have hit the Mother in a sensitive area Aedan thought to himself, suddenly glad that Oghren wasn't here and they could avoid the obvious nipples as targets joke. The Mother was a crazy abomination of a broodmother with more nipples and breasts than even Oghren would think proper. The sight and smell of her alone was enough to make one vomit, even before the giant tentacles and the cocoons filled with her 'children' were factored in. The mother's 'children' were insect like darkspawn which grew after they fed upon any flesh - alive or dead - fellow darkspawn included. The Mother and her children were some of the most monstrous and disgusting creatures created but the Architect, now dead in the chamber behind them along with his fallen Warden Utha.

"Son of a..." Aedan cursed as he felt a bite at his ankle. He slashed Vigilance downwards and sliced off the face of a childer grub. He scanned the area; they were quickly being outnumbered by childers bursting out of their cocoons, drawn to fresh flesh.

"Velanna, can you thin out their ranks?" the Commander shouted. He saw fire pour forth from the elven mage's outstretched hands that set a line of grubs aflame. "Sigrun protect Velanna and watch our backs, I've got Nathaniel. Howe can you kill this bitch?" he said as he attacked another childer.

"I am trying you know," Nathaniel said through gritted teeth.

"Try harder or we're all dead," Sigrun shouted as she killed another.

"Aarrrggghhh," Velanna screamed as she was overwhelmed by three childers and fell to the ground.

Nathaniel slowed his breathing and calmly focused on his target, blocking out all other sounds. As he exhaled he loosed the arrow and continued to watch it as it streaked towards the Mother. Unfortunately, the Mother saw it and moved at the last second and instead of striking her in the eye and killing her, the arrow went through her cheek and out the side of her neck. Howe turned towards the screams and saw Sigrun fighting her way towards where Velanna lay smothered on the ground. "Velanna I'm coming."

"Damn it Howe," Aedan cursed as Nathaniel withdrew from battling the Mother to aid Velanna. He sliced off the tip of another tentacle and moved forwards to face the Mother directly.

The Mother seemed to have gone insane with pain from the arrow lodged in her hideous hinged mouth. Her smaller tentacled arms snapped around and before her at random. Her huge bulk gyrated in an almost hypnotizing way and he could see childer eggs through the membranous skin being pushed towards her sphincter where she would lay them. Even had he not already known that killing the Architect had been the right thing to do, the sight of this horror, his creation, would have confirmed it.

A tentacle burst forth from the ground in front of him. The Commander leapt up on it and then lunged at the Mother, both of his swords thrust out before him as he released a primal scream of rage. He felt his swords bite into the Mother's chest just as he felt one of her tentacles stab him in the shoulder beneath his pauldron, causing him to lose his grip on Starfang. The Mother hissed at him and they were so close together he could feel her spittle on his face. Aedan punched her in the mouth with his free hand and between his movements and all of his body weight hanging from the one sword he could feel Vigilance pulling downwards through her torso.

The Warden Commander tried to grab back onto Starfang as he batted away the smaller tentacles and the Mother screamed in pain and terror. He saw an arrow strike just to the right of his head.

"Jump down Commander," Sigrun called.

Aedan braced his feet against the Mother's chest and pushed off, flying backwards and landing badly on the ankle that had been bitten earlier. He watched as Sigrun threw her axe as Nathaniel let fly another arrow, both struck true. The Mother released a final scream and then slumped over dead.

The Commander forced himself back to his feet, swaying a little. "How is everyone?"

"Velanna is badly injured Commander," Nathaniel said scornfully. "I have a few wounds but nothing serious."

"I'm fine Commander, nothing too bad," Sigrun added.

"Let's do what we can here for Velanna and then if need be we'll carry her out of here," said the Commander.

"This wouldn't have happened if you had allied with the Architect," Nathaniel said hotly.

"Grey Warden's _**do not**_ make deals with darkspawn – we kill them," The Commander replied just as fiercely. Aedan took a deep breath before speaking calmly, "Do you want to continue this now or help Velanna."

They pooled their health poultices and used all but one on Velanna who was still unconscious. The final one they split between the three of them. Aedan still hurt and walked with a bad limp but the edge of his pain was gone and that was enough for now. He limped over to the Mother's corpse and retrieved his blades and Sigrun's axe. He left Nathaniel's arrows in the Mother's corpse as most were embedded so deeply that it was too hard to retrieve them. Also the thought of climbing up and over the Mother's flesh to retrieve them was not an appealing one.

"Nathaniel, you and I will take turns carrying Velanna. Can you take her first and Sigrun and I will burn this chamber and then set off some of Dworkin's lyrium explosives to seal it." Nathaniel picked up the elf signalling his agreement.

"Nathaniel will come around Commander," Sigrun said once Howe was out of earshot.

"Do you disagree with my decision to kill the Architect?"

"No Commander., you were right. We don't make deals with darkspawn for any reason."

"Maybe we'll get some quiet time and I can look through the Architect's research. As for Nathaniel he isn't thinking it through and not understanding the consequences of allying with the Architect. He's seen the Disciples and the Mother, who knows what the Architect would have created next if allowed to live. Either Nathaniel will come around or he won't. The sad truth is that he doesn't have to like me, provided he follows orders."

Aedan continued almost as an afterthought, "I also suspect his concern for our friends and especially for Velanna may be colouring his remarks too." The Commander was certain that Sigrun could also see that the pair's banter could easily lead to romance. Certainly Nathaniel seemed interested. In some ways it reminded him of Alistair and Morrigan except without the underlying thread of malice. "It speaks well of Nathaniel if I am correct, his demon of a father would have gladly sacrificed everyone and everything to reach his twisted goals."

...

The farmer Scott urged his oxen forwards towards the guards standing watch along the road leading to Vigil's Keep. The Wardens had exited the Mother's lair and had walked for what felt like the better part of a day before they found his farm. Aedan had told Scott who he was and where he was going and asked either to use his horses and cart or else for Scott to take them to Vigil's Keep.

"Halt! Who goes there," the guard asked warily.

"It is Warden Commander Cousland and three of his fellow Warden's returning to see how the Vigil fares," Aedan said. "We have one wounded who requires a healer."

The guards approached, swords at the ready, and then relaxed after recognizing the Commander.

"My Lord, the Vigil held out against the darkspawn, but there are many dead and the Keep itself is almost destroyed. Most of the healers are in the outer courtyard and we have created a perimeter around the keep free of darkspawn," the guard said.

"Have any reinforcements arrived either from Highever or Denerim?" the Commander asked.

"I am sorry My Lord but I do not know," said the guard. "May I ask how the city fares?"

"The city still stands," Aedan said to both guards relief. "We rallied its defenders and after a week of fighting we routed the darkspawn. There are many dead and wounded but the city is secure and when we left the wounded were being attended to and patrols were sweeping the city for darkspawn and survivors. We four have just come from killing the darkspawn leaders. Maker willing, without their leaders the bastards will return to the depths and we will get a moment to breathe.

"I am sorry that we couldn't be here," Aedan said hoping the guards would understand. "We just couldn't leave the city defenceless."

"I understand My Lord, my family lives in the city," the guard said.

"What is your name soldier?"

"It is Stephen Williamson My Lord, Private Stephen Williamson."

"I shall pray to the Maker that your family is safe Private Williamson," said the Commander. "Master Scott please take us to the healers."

They moved down the path and Aedan thought his heart might break again. The Vigil was one of Ferelden's oldest settlements and had survived barbarians, Tevinters and the Orlesians and now it looked to be little more than ruins. Huge craters dotted the landscape from the Vigil's trebuchets and catapults, though some looked like they may have been made with Dworkin's explosives. One of the doors of the massive outer gates lay on the ground while the other barely hung from its hinges and it too was threatening to fall. Large sections of the wall were toppled and everywhere you looked fires burned unfettered and smoke billowed, even high up in the towers.

As they approached closer the screams of the wounded and dying rang out clearly. Their shrieks were like daggers to Aedan's heart. He looked to his right and jumped off the moving cart, almost landing on his face, and began to limp towards Seneschal Varel. Varel looked worn and beaten but not bowed.

"Varel, please give me a report," the Commander asked.

"You're alive," Varel answered before recovering. "Sorry Commander, the darkspawn horde has broken against the Vigil's walls, but it was bloody and cost us dearly. We have men patrolling the area to warn against another attack. If there is another attack I doubt we will survive," he said wearily. "Every able body is searching for survivors and tending the wounded. Of the Wardens, Justice is dead and Oghren is badly wounded and under a healers care. That drunken fool of a dwarf took on two ogres by himself and gave us time to retake the courtyard. Anders is somewhere helping the healers and we could have used a hundred more of him. The man is a hero and saved many lives and killed hundreds of darkspawn – I shall never speak ill of another mage after seeing him in action.

"How does the city fare Commander"

Aedan told Varel, the captains and lieutenants gathered around him that the city was safe and that he had sent messengers to Highever and Denerim for reinforcements. He went on to tell the final fate of the Architect and the Mother.

"Without their leaders I am hopeful that the mass of the darkspawn will return to the deeps leaving us only a few stragglers. After the archdemon fell the darkspawn became confused and disorganized and were relatively easily handed. We'll get every able Warden to lead a team and sweep the Vigil and the surrounding area since we can sense the darkspawn and won't be surprised. I do sense darkspawn, but it is unfocused and not too close. I would rather be safe and kill them all quickly than have them lie in wait."

...

The remainder of the day was long and the night longer still, but as the sun rose the following day it felt like they were secure and making some progress. The few darkspawn that had lingered outside the Vigil and its surrounding lands had been found and killed and after being ordered to rest for a time Anders was back helping the healers. Velanna was faring better now that Anders had used his magic to heal her and hopefully in a day or two will have regained enough strength to also begin healing with her magic. Oghren was still unconscious but was breathing steadily and it appeared the worst was behind him. Nathaniel and Sigrun had both had their wounds tended and were fit.

It was midday when the horns sounded indicating friendly forces were arriving. Aedan was shocked to see Queen Anora herself at the head of a small army wearing dragonscale armour with a sword at her hip. As she got down from her horse Aedan knelt before her.

"Your Majesty thank you for lending your assistance though I am surprised that you would lead your troops yourself."

"I was trained with a blade by my father and am not ignorant of the ways of battle Warden Commander," Anora said. "Your messenger told of us of your urgent need and the attacks on the City of Amaranthine and Vigil's Keep. I felt it prudent to investigate these matters myself. What is the situation here?"

"We have swept the surrounding grounds and continue to progress through the Vigil so that we might ensure no darkspawn remain, find any survivors, and fight the fires within. If you have healers I would appreciate them taking over and allowing ours to get some rest, they have been working constantly since the first attack. I would also appreciate it if we split your men and partner them with my own to patrol the countryside for stragglers while some come with me and my fellow Wardens into the Vigil itself.

"The City of Amaranthine still stands and when last I was there the men were seeing to the survivors. I have sent word to Highever and asked my brother for assistance and I would expect that if the first of his troops haven't arrived yet they should shortly. The Arling was caught between two darkspawn factions fighting for supremacy. Both leaders are now dead and if the darkspawn revert to form they should be returning to the ground however there will still be some roving about and in need of killing.

"The Orlesian Wardens who were here are all dead and including myself there are only five Wardens, two injured. Master Voldrik, a dwarven stonemason, has begun to see to the integrity of the Vigil and to grant access to collapsed areas so that we may continue to search for survivors."

Aedan and his chief advisors conversed with Queen Anora , her generals and commanders, expanding on his explanation of all that had happened both here and in the city. Eventually a plan along what he had suggested was adopted. Before entering the Vigil he pulled aside Varel.

"Seneschal Varel, please keep a guard on the Queen in addition to her own. She is only to be allowed entry into the Vigil under the direst of circumstances – she must be protected at all costs."

"Of course Commander I shall see it done," Varel answered. "And if the Queen insists?"

"Appeal to her sense of self preservation and the safety of her people. If she enters the Vigil she is in as much danger of the building collapsing around her as from darkspawn. We would also have to free more guards for her and those soldiers could either be fighting fires or tending the wounded," said the Commander.

It took the remainder of the day and part of the night until they finally cleared the Vigil of darkspawn and checked to ensure the passage to the Deep Roads discovered earlier was still sealed. They had managed to rescue some survivors trapped in the debris and to extinguish some fires but it was slow work and couldn't be rushed. Voldrik and a team of men were checking the structure's safety while others fought the few fires still raging.

The Warden Commander flopped down onto the grass to rest and leaned against the shattered remains of a tree. His ankle was screaming in pain and his shoulder was stiff from his earlier wounds against the Mother and her children. He closed his eyes for a moment.

Queen Anora was walking around the courtyard overseeing the efforts and providing whatever support she could to the survivors. She had heard from one of her own captains that the inside of Vigil's Keep was now free of darkspawn and that recovery teams were now inside battling the last of the fires and doing another check for survivors. The aftermath of this battle reminded her of when she had arrived in Denerim after the final battle with the archdemon. The smell of burned flesh and the cries of the wounded and dying carried in the air. She was looking for the Warden Commander, surprised and a little annoyed that he had not informed her of their progress personally and had left it for one of her men. Off to her right she saw a man slumped against a tree stump that looked as though it might be Cousland. As she neared she could recognize his face and it looked as though he was sleeping. It was only when the Queen was a few steps away that she noticed the moon's reflection in the pool of blood on the ground and called for a healer.

Anora knelt beside the Commander and began to unbuckle his armour as it seemed that his shoulder was bleeding. Cousland did not stir as she jostled him about while removing his breastplate. Her fears were confirmed when she removed his padded vest and saw the seeping bandages through his tattered shirt. "Where is the healer?" she shouted as she gingerly removed the Commander's bandages and put pressure on his wound.

"Here your Majesty," shouted a woman running towards her with one of her guards. "Please remove your hands and let me look."

Anora removed her hands, stained red and dripping the Warden Commander's blood. She watched the healer draw a dagger to cut away the remains of his shirt. The healer gasped as she saw the scars covering his chest from the archdemon's teeth now clearly visible and still an angry red as though fresh. Several of her own guards were also startled by the sight.

"You," the Queen pointed to one of her guards, "find the Warden Anders. He is a mage and a healer and can be of assistance to his Commander. Be quick about it." Anora did not hear the concern in her voice.

* * *

_A/N: The events of Awakening form the basis of both this and the next chapter and while I am not going into any great detail about it I am hopeful that I am not spoiling anything (just buy it already :D). Also I have been remiss in not thanking the people who have taken the time to review and/or place this story on alert/favorites. It means a lot to me so again I thank you. _


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

The following morning despite the warnings of Anders and the healers, the Warden Commander accompanied Queen Anora and two platoons of soldiers comprised from both the Royal Army and the Vigil heading for the city.

Aedan knew that he was swaying in his saddle and that it meant that he should have remained at the Vigil and gotten some much needed rest, however it was his duty to see to the safety of the city and the Arling and he was determined that he would not fail them again.

"My Lord, are you alright?" Queen Anora asked. She could hear his laboured breathing and see him sway in his saddle. The Queen suspected that it was only willpower that kept the Warden Commander going now, his reserves long ago having left him.

"Thank you for your concern your Majesty, I am fine," said the Commander. He reached in the pouch at his waist and retrieved and downed a small flask of healing poultice and another flask to restore his stamina.

They continued down the road for a time before Aedan felt the burning in his blood that said darkspawn were nearby. He raised his hand to call for a stop and he closed his eyes to concentrate and determine how many and where exactly the creatures were.

"Darkspawn," the Warden Commander said as he slid from his horse. He drew his swords, Starfang and Vigilance, their runes causing fire and ice to dance upon their respective blades. "There are upwards of thirty, including two ogres, an emissary and a disciple over this way. Remain here your Majesty. Second platoon guard the Queen."

Warden Commander Cousland did not even look back to see if the others followed before he stalked off to face the enemy.

Aedan had already slain his first genlock and was tangling with one of the ogres when the other members of the platoon met the enemy. "Archers kill the emissary!"

The Commander dodged the lunging fist of the ogre and thrust Starfang upwards into the ogre's neck killing it instantly. He scanned the area looking for the most dangerous darkspawn. The emissary had died in a hail of arrows and crossbow bolts. The other ogre was being harried by eight soldiers and some archers but he couldn't see the Disciple even though he felt his presence.

He saw that the Queen and the soldiers assigned to protect her had ignored his order and had moved to the battlefield. They were coming under attack and so his decision was made and he moved to assist. It would harm both his and his Order's reputation were she to die under his protection even through no fault of his own. Aedan fought through the darkspawn towards the Queen and as he neared he heard the telltale screeches of shrieks as they appeared before the remaining guards and quickly slew half their number.

"Protect the Queen," yelled the Commander, calling for reinforcements. He slashed Starfang and thrust Vigilance before him and dimly noted that two shrieks now lay dead. His path to Anora now clear he rushed to her side. "Your Majesty I wish you had stayed with the horses." He looked at the Queen, her armour was streaked red and her sword dripped blood. She had not been lying about being trained with a sword but this was no sparring match and there was still the Disciple to worry about.

Aedan's stomach turned and the fire in his blood burned even stronger as the Disciple neared. He pushed Anora behind him and turned to face the oncoming threat.

"You killed the Father. You killed the Mother." The Disciple hissed in its snakelike voice as it advanced upon the Warden Commander with its massive bastard sword. "You will die now."

"Get the Queen away from me," Aedan screamed as he moved towards the almost humanlike darkspawn. "Which one of the Architect's foul creations are you?"

"It is the Seeker who will be killing you and grinding your bones to dust."

The Seeker, that name seemed familiar to him and he thought of the Wending Woods but couldn't spare the time to reflect on it further as their swords met. The Disciples were darkspawn that had drank the blood of his fellow Grey Wardens. It changed them, granting them intelligence and their own will and made them far more dangerous than the others. Also the Disciples each seemed to have their own identity and personality, something that only the Architect and the Mother had also possessed. Fighting a Disciple was like fighting a twisted reflection of a Grey Warden and each was more than a match for most men.

Aedan crossed his blades to catch the overhead slash of the Seeker's massive sword. His injured shoulder complained from the effort and he pushed to his right to move the blade away from him. As the Disciple lunged forwards, following his blade downwards, the Commander drove his knee into the Seeker's stomach before retreating a step. A soldier tried to come to his aid and the Seeker easily dispatched him as he drew himself back to full height.

He parried the Seeker attacks, using both swords when needed to overcome the Disciple's strength advantage. On the attack his own swords were a blur of fire and ice as they spun to keep the Seeker off balance while searching for an opening. Thankfully no other soldiers stepped forwards to engage the Seeker as they would have surely died from the arcs of death both combatants were unleashing with their blades; each using all of his strength and skill to meet the other.

Again the Seeker attempted an overhead slash which was met by both the Commander's swords. This time though instead of trying to drive the bastard sword to the side Aedan pushed back with all his remaining strength as he proceeded to kick the Seeker in the groin with all his might. He didn't know if the tactic would work, never having bothered to investigate the mating habits and sexual equipment of darkspawn before, but there was little to lose.

As the Seeker released his sword and dropped to his knees with a cry of pain, Aedan thought that he had the answer now. A distant part of him wondered at the reproductive process of darkspawn and broodmothers however that was a question best left for another day.

Aedan crossed his swords before the Seeker's neck and with a grunt of effort severed the Disciple's head.

Queen Anora was just about to rebuke the Warden Commander for putting his hands on her and pushing her aside when she saw another attacker coming towards them. This was the first time she had seen live darkspawn before and she had called upon all her strength not to throw up at the sight. Now this darkspawn, 'the Seeker', it called itself was upon them. The creature's hissed voice and cold white eyes with red pupils resembled something from a nightmare and would surely haunt her nights. She was paralyzed with fear.

"My Queen please come with me," a soldier said as he put his arm on her back to guide her, gently pushing her forward.

Anora barely noticed as more soldiers surrounded her, protecting her, as she moved within a ring of steel. The Queen kept Cousland in sight as he battled the monster, the sound of their swords clashing ringing out over the battlefield. She had seen the Warden Commander only a brief time before the battle and he barely had the strength to keep himself in his horse's saddle, and yet now he fought as though possessed to slay his enemies, defend the land and protect his Queen and countrymen.

The Queen watched as the Warden decapitated the Seeker and then moment's later drop to his knees as if he was a marionette whose strings had been cut. "Aedan," Anora cried out as she tried to push through her guards to see if he was injured, but her guards would not yield.

"Someone check on the Warden Commander," the Queen ordered after regaining some of her composure. She watched as he waved the soldier off as he neared and directed him to check on the others. Anora could see the pain and effort in Aedan's eyes as he leaned against his swords and forced himself to his feet before limping over to where she stood.

"Are you injured your Majesty?" Aedan asked.

"I am fine Aedan; and you?" asked the Queen.

"I will be fine once I get some poultices from my saddle bag. We need to see to the injured and burn the darkspawn before they corrupt the land. I do not sense any more darkspawn - we are safe for now," the Warden Commander and Teryn of Gwaren replied wearily. Anora ordered one of her guards to retrieve the Commander's pack as the others broke formation to see to their comrades.

It was several hours before the injured were in travelling condition and the pyres were lit during which time Anora watched as Aedan drank more health and stamina poultices than seemed proper. They rode off with Anora beside the Warden Commander, unknowingly keeping a close, worried eye on him. It was several hours more before they reached the City of Amaranthine.

...

Only because she had just come from Vigil's Keep did Anora think that the destruction, though immense, was not as bad as it could have been. The city's walls had held out better the Vigil's, though if what the Warden Commander said was true the bulk of the darkspawn horde had attacked their instead. It made sense, Vigil's Keep had been better prepared and defended than the city.

Aedan had told her that he had withdrawn some of his men from the city to patrol the surrounding lands both to protect the farmers, who greatly outnumbered the city's denizens, and to protect the trade routes. In this way he hoped to provide warning of and try and hold back the darkspawn from overwhelming the land. The city at least had its walls and fortifications and could defend itself while the farmers were like lambs waiting for slaughter. Anora knew that most of the other nobles of Ferelden would have withdrawn their troops to protect their cities and left the common folk to fend for themselves. Faced with such a choice Anora probably would have done so herself without a second thought.

As they walked through the camps outside the city the people showed their respect for their queen, but when the Aedan approached he was treated as though he was the second coming of the Maker himself. People cried as they thanked him for saving the city and for their lives and the Commander seemed embarrassed and directed the praise at everyone else who fought instead of himself. Anora watched silently as the Commander comforted the dying, his words seemingly doing as much as the healers to ease their pain. In moments when Aedan was alone with her as they walked she could see the pain in his eyes caused by the destruction of the city and more importantly the loss of life. It was clear that he thought he had failed his people and he was hurting as a result. Then as someone approached he would put on his mask, summoning up his strength for his people, putting on the concerned yet strong and resolute face as he gave comfort and spoke of better days ahead. The Queen knew that the mask wasn't false but that Aedan couldn't afford to wallow in his pain and ponder what-ifs. He needed to lead and inspire, to be strong for them and let the people feed off his strength and determination which he seemed to have in abundance. Queen Anora was humbled by his example.

"Commander, your Majesty," Constable Aiden said as he stood at attention before them. "Teryn Cousland arrived with a thousand men from Highever yesterday before nightfall with more expected. Our patrols have almost finished sweeping the city looking for survivors and the fires are all out. My Lord, we were in desperate need of supplies before I remembered the smugglers den you found. It is under guard and we have been rationing those supplies out to the needy but we will need more."

"Excellent work Constable. Have a clerk prepare a listing of what we are in need of and when our supplies are expected to run out," the Commander said. "Has there been any further darkspawn activity in the area?"

"No my Lord, we have setup an outer perimeter that is heavily patrolled to ensure the safety of the camps here and to warn in case of another attack, but Maker be thanked it has proven unnecessary for now." The constable noted the Commander's nod of acknowledgement. "How fares the Vigil Commander?"

"The darkspawn broke upon its walls but the cost was terrible," Aedan said, a bit of the pain he felt entering his voice. "For the foreseeable future we cannot count on aid from the Vigil as its men are needed there.

"Do you know where my brother is?"

"I shall take you to him my Lord," said the Constable as he led them off.

"Aedan," Fergus called as he stomped towards his brother before gathering him up in a bear hug. "Did you leave any darkspawn for anyone else," he said in an attempt to lighten the mood as he slapped his brother's back drawing a grunt of pain. He released his brother and looked at him closely, his armour needed repair and he looked weary. The city folk had already spread tales of the prowess of the Grey Wardens who were being hailed as saviours with his brother foremost among them and not just because he was their Commander. He was proud of his younger brother and knew that Mother and Father would have been as well.

"I brought a thousand of my best and sent the call out for reserves who will be arriving once they've formed up," Highever's Teryn said. "I also sent word to the Circle of Magi calling for healers though I don't know if they will come." The Chantry would have final say over whether the mages would come and even though the need was clear there was no guarantee.

"I made the same request of the Grand Cleric before leaving Denerim," Queen Anora added.

"Forgive me your Majesty," Fergus said after recognizing the queen. Anora waved off the slight. "As many healers as I could spare came with me and I gave notice to our masons and carpenters that their services might be needed," Fergus added. "The situation here is well in hand though we will need food and supplies before too long. The city has been swept several times and is being heavily patrolled to maintain order. Those whose homes and business are safe have been allowed to return. Do you need any men at Vigil's Keep?"

"Queen Anora brought men and healers up from Denerim and has already sent for more," the Commander said. "The Vigil is near ruin though it defeated the darkspawn the loss of life was terrible." He continued describing the state of the Vigil and the men and women there.

...

Several days later Aedan pulled his brother aside.

"Fergus, do you have a messenger you trust who can deliver a letter for me?"

"Of course, where would he be going?"

"To Haven and the Temple of Andraste," the Commander said.

"Leliana?"

"Yes, sooner or later she will hear of this and worry. I would rather she heard the details from me."

"Brother, you were a fool to ever let that woman leave your side," Fergus said, shaking his head.

"It was best for both of us and at least I know she is safe," Aedan gestured to indicate the city.

"True enough."


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

12 Cloudreach, 9:33 Dragon

Village of Haven

Aedan, his mabari Elric and his horse Kodo walked up the muddy path towards the village the Haven. The sun was out and the temperature pleasant and apart from a few large piles the snow had melted. Buds were starting on the wild growth and a few of the mountain flowers had even begun to flower. He picked a bouquet of wild flowers for his bard, lamenting the fact that there wasn't any Andraste's Grace – Leliana's favourite.

Ever since he had broken camp that morning the thought of his impending reunion with Leliana had been making his stomach queasy, he was glad that he hadn't bothered to stop for a midday meal. Now that he had nearly reached the village he was even regretting his morning meal. He thought back to the letter he had sent her so many months ago, and as he had regularly done since then he wished that he had been more open and honest about his feelings. His letter let Leliana know that he was safe and some of the details of the attacks upon Amaranthine and that with her permission he would visit her before Summerday. He had been chaste and polite in case someone other than his bard read his words and her reply had been written in the same manner. Even though Leliana said she would welcome his visit he feared that he had travelled here on a fool's quest.

The Warden Commander reached the first plateau. On his left was the home where they had first seen the bloody evidence that something was very wrong in Haven. He noted that two templars were approaching him and raised his hands to appear non-threatening, the bouquet of wildflowers no doubt helping.

"May I ask who you are Ser and what is your purpose in Haven," one of the templar's said.

"I am Warden Commander Aedan Cousland, Teryn of Gwaren and Arl of Amaranthine and I am here to visit my dear friend, Lady Leliana, who left Highever and came to Haven and the Temple of Andraste with Brother Genitivi among others. Should you doubt it either can attest to my identity."

The templars eyed him, studying him closely. At his neck his cloak was held by clasps bearing the standard of the Warden Commander, two addorsed griffons with elevated wings atop a branch. His dragonwing armour was of exceptional quality and fit indicating it had been made solely for the wearer. He was heavily armed and accompanied by a mabari and horse also indicating a man of wealth. If this man was Warden Commander and a Teryn though it was surprising that he would travel alone.

The templars had heard the tales of the Warden Commander who had led the initial expedition to Andraste's Temple and had found the Urn of Sacred Ashes, even using a pinch of the ashes to heal Arl Eamon of Redcliffe. It was said that he was fearsome with a blade and accompanied everywhere by his loyal mabari. As well very few people outside those in the village and in the highest reaches of the chantry and Templar Order even knew where the Temple of Andraste was located. The templars shared a look and then the one who had spoken earlier spoke again.

"My Lord we are honoured by your presence here. Please allow me to escort you to Sister Leliana."

After visiting the stables they walked through the village drawing a few curious looks and some less than kind, perhaps those people had been among the inhabitants he met on his first visit. The templar told him of their efforts within the temple and overcoming the hostility of Haven's remaining residents who had worshiped a High Dragon as the reincarnated Andraste. Of course Aedan already knew this as he and his companions had slain the dragon and all the dragon worshippers who had attacked them on their quest for the Urn of Sacred Ashes.

The templar, Ser Jarvis, led them into the temple, now brightly lit unlike his first visit. Aedan had to stop and look in wonder. The snow that been in the corners and along the stone was gone, the broken roof having been repaired. In the stone floor there were insets of Andraste's undying flame that shone as though freshly polished. He moved to the wall to look at the incredibly detailed carvings and stained glass windows, the images representing the struggle and victory against the Tevinter Imperium and the life of Andraste. The temple's ceiling had originally been painted in a mural and though faded was easily among the most beautiful things the Commander had ever seen. He forced himself to move on knowing that there would be time later to examine everything in more detail.

"Sister Leliana should be just ahead in the library my Lord," said Ser Jarvis who waited in the hall.

Aedan thanked the templar and just stood in the doorway. Unknowingly he held his breath and even from behind and without her red hair he knew which one was his bard from her stance alone. Her loose fitting chantry robes could not disguise her womanly curves and graceful body that had always seemed to perfectly mold itself to his. Leliana had let her hair grow and it was now past her shoulders and collected in a single braid. He stood there silently, a smile plastered on his face and content just to gaze upon her until she noticed him.

"May I help you with something Ser?" a man in chantry robes asked uneasily as every head turned towards him. The sight of a heavily armed man accompanied by a mabari warhound no doubt making the man wary.

The Commander had just begun to answer when he heard "Aedan" and saw Leliana running towards him. The bard reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck as his arms surrounded her waist and he picked her up off her feet. Mindful of the roomful of chantry initiates he kissed his bard chastely on the cheek, though his thoughts were anything but. He set Leliana back onto the ground and watched as she hugged Elric and received a sloppy lick of greeting.

"Yuck Elric stop," Leliana giggled a reprimand that no one would believe. The hound was almost as excited to see the pretty bard as his master.

He gave her the flowers and after some quick introductions Leliana excused herself and took Aedan on a tour of some of the discoveries they had made. He spoke with Brother Genitivi who introduced him to more people and though he was normally very good with names and faces these were all lost in a blur. The Commander's concentration failing him with knowing that his bard was beside him.

After returning to the village they sat down to a simple dinner of bread and vegetable stew. As poor a cook as Aedan was it was the best meal he had eaten in days.

"What brings you to Haven my Lord?" Genitivi asked.

"Well I had written to Leliana that I would visit her and I had some business near Redcliffe which I was able to advance so that I could do both on one trip. Haven is a long way from Amaranthine and unfortunately there are many demands on my time and sadly not enough Wardens," Aedan answered.

"Yes, we have heard about the attacks on the city and Vigil's Keep from Leliana and some brothers and sisters who arrived after. How is the rebuilding going?"

"Most of the city should be rebuilt before this winter while Master Voldrik, our stonemason, advises that the Vigil will take another four years or so before it is up to his high dwarven standards. Buildings can be rebuilt and farms can be replanted but the loss of life was the true tragedy. Fortunately the darkspawn have all returned to the earth and there have been no further attacks." The last was answered with agreement and prayers to the Maker for all those lost.

Dinner was replaced by conversation that went on for some time and just when Aedan was wondering where he would sleep that night Brother Genetivi offered a small cabin that they had been using for guests and traders that was currently unoccupied.

"Sister Leliana, would you please escort his Lordship to his cabin?" Genetivi asked. "It is after all you who he came to visit."

Together Aedan and Leliana walked to his cabin on the outskirts of the village. The Commander filled his bard in on the news from Highever and Amaranthine and the developments of those she knew. All too quickly they reached the cabin and as Leliana stopped outside the front door Aedan felt a twinge of pain.

"You have had a long day Aedan, perhaps it is best if I leave you to get a full night's rest and we'll speak more in the morning." The bard leaned forwards and kissed his cheek and quickly disappeared.

The Commander slept uneasily, if at all, and as soon as the sun started to rise he was outside practicing. He attacked invisible opponents with his swords, trying to work off his nervous tension from seeing Leliana again and her abrupt departure last night. He finished and walked to the lake with buckets from his cabin to fetch some water to wash himself. Aedan was almost finished when there was a knock on the door.

"Come in."

"Aedan, I have come to collect you for breakfast," Leliana said as she entered the cabin. The Commander was shirtless and was washing himself. She bit her lip at seeing her Warden run a cloth over his muscular chest. His scars still a bright red and a vivid reminder of how near she had come to losing him. He noticed her attention and moved so that he was facing her as he continued to run the cloth over his skin. Leliana felt herself blush, her Warden was the only one who could make her so flustered.

"Would you help me wash my back please?" Aedan turned and held the cloth out behind him.

Leliana took the cloth and dipped it in the small soapy basin before bringing it to his back. She washed his back in silence, repressing a moan that threatened to escape her lips as memories of baths they had shared sprang to mind. She had always found it so intimate and sensual when they had bathed together and she had sat between her Wardens legs, her back to him, as he washed her and kneaded her muscles, his hands freely roaming her body and then she would do the same to him. She finished with the soapy cloth and then began to quickly rinse the soap from his skin. She resisted the urge to run her fingertips along his scars as she had done so often, knowing that it tickled Aedan and always led to other things; things that would require another, more thorough, washing. _Damn this man, he is doing this on purpose_, she thought to herself.

"Finished," she said, no longer prepared to tempt fate and with a readymade excuse that they were both expected for the morning meal. "I have been excused from my duties today and thought that we might take some food with us and go for a walk. When we first came here there was no time to linger and there are some spectacular views nearby. It will give us a chance to talk and catch up."

"I would like that very much," Aedan answered. His heart beat faster thinking that maybe she had left him so quickly last night because she had already planned this.

Leliana led them down a game trail that skirted the lake. The lake's water was so clear and pure that one might think it wasn't there and walk into it expecting to safely walk across the lakebed. As the sun rose in the sky the temperature rose as well and it was beginning to feel like a mid-summer day and not one of early spring. Aedan removed his cloak and was even beginning to regret wearing his armour although experience had told him that it was better to be prepared than not. He took a sip from his waterskin as the path began to climb. They walked uphill until almost midday before finally taking a branching path that led to a small clearing.

The view was more than worth the effort of the journey. It looked down on the lake and you could see Haven in the distance. To the left was a magnificent view of the Frostbacks, looking like Thedas' snow tipped teeth stretched towards the sky. To the right it overlooked the Temple of Andraste and allowed one to see the massive scale of the structure and view its crenelations and the stained glass windows that ran along its length. Even when he had first entered the temple with only the light from a torch to see it had struck him as awe inspiring and majestic. It was clear that the men and women who built it had invested all of their strength, skill, talent and faith in its construction and details. The craftsmanship was unlike anything he had ever seen before or likely would again. The contrast of the view was staggering. On one side the Frostback Mountains displaying a beauty created by the Maker. On the other side the Temple of Andraste, a beautiful creation of the Maker's children to honour his bride and prophet.

"It's beautiful here. Thank you for taking me," Aedan said. He tried not to think back to when he had taken his bard to Promontory Point in Highever and had suggested she leave him and come here with the Chantry. He had broken his heart to allow Leliana the time and space to decide whether they had a future together. The Commander could only hope that the result was better this day.

He turned and saw that Leliana had laid out a blanket atop the grass and had sat down and was rooting through her pack, no doubt for something to eat for themselves and his hound. Aedan decided to unbuckle his dragonwing armour as he was hot from exertion, and it was not terribly comfortable to sit on the ground in if given a choice.

"Please Leliana tell me all that has happened to you since you left Highever," Aedan asked. He listened as she spoke describing a few of the discoveries she had made herself and the new friends she had met. Her initial weeks were spent ensuring no traps remained in the temple and looking for hidden passages and rooms that were undiscovered from their first visit. Later she worked to catalogue the many libraries throughout the temple and had begun to help Brother Genitivi with his research. A few times she had escorted the caravans that travelled to Redcliffe bringing back news, letters and supplies. The Commander listened intently, it had been far too long since he listened to one of her stories or heard her sing and he had missed it. Her sweet voice was like a balm to his soul.

"And you, can you tell me more of your adventures? I know that you would not have told everything last night," Leliana asked.

Aedan spoke at length about travelling to Vigil's Keep to find it overrun by the darkspawn and all of the Orlesian Wardens lost. He spoke of the new Wardens he had recruited and described each in turn; surprising Leliana that Oghren now had a son who was named after him. The horrors of the Architect, childers, Disciples and the Mother was described in frightening detail after the bard had pressed for more information. He told her of the attack on the City of Amaranthine and its aftermath as well as Vigil's Keep and outlined some of his plans for their reconstruction.

"Is there anything else you wish to tell me?" Leliana asked. Seeing the confused look upon the Commander's face she added, "Even in distant Haven we hear the rumours of how close you have grown to the Queen and of your many visits to Denerim." The pain of betrayal shaded her voice.

"Queen Anora was invaluable in those initial days after the attacks. She helped me to get much needed food, supplies, and healers, as did Fergus. We split the Bannorn amongst us and each pleaded for aid for Amaranthine. Without both Anora's and Fergus' efforts many people would have died starving in the lean days that followed or died of their injuries because initially the Chantry would not consent to the mages leaving the tower. Since that time I have travelled to Denerim many times to see her and even travelled with Anora to Gwaren so that we could arrange timber for Amaranthine and so she could introduce me to some of the noble families and the Seneschal, Terrence. While I get reports from the Terynir regarding everything from the Seneschal's decisions when he holds court on my behalf to the land's finances I had never been to Gwaren before and am unsure of when I will be able to return. I visit Anora as Warden Commander, Teryn and Arl and perhaps even a trusted advisor. Even though lately I seem to go to Denerim and the Landsmeet as a beggar I am still a powerful voice within it and my opinion valued."

Aedan looked into his bard's eyes and saw a slight raise of her eyebrow, a final doubt to be assuaged.

"I have said before that my heart already belongs to another and despite you releasing me from my vow that has never changed," Aedan said seriously. "No one has shared my bed since the last time I was with you."

"Forgive me for doubting," Leliana said quietly.

"There is nothing to forgive," said the Commander. "Did you hear no tales of the many daughters set on becoming a Teryn's wife that I politely refused?" He turned serious and looked away from her eyes, fearful of the answer to his next words. "Do you not think that I dreaded coming here and seeing you again only to find that you had found someone who can give you everything you deserve and that I cannot? I must confess that after last night when you disappeared on me so quickly I fear the worst."

"My heart too has been claimed. Perhaps one day I will introduce you to him," Leliana laughed as she put her arms around his neck and leaned in for a kiss. Aedan's hands circled her waist and pulled the bard on top of him as he lay back on the blanket.

Leliana felt herself being pulled forwards onto her Warden as he lay down. She moved her right hand so that she caressed his cheek as she felt Aedan's tongue splitting her lips and quickly met it with her own. It felt so good to be held in his strong arms again. They kissed with a hunger and need, and their feverish kisses and dancing tongues served only to further ignite their passion and longing for each another.

Aedan's left hand ran along her spine and Leliana could feel her skin tingling even through her robes. His right hand moved to her chin and gently pushed her head to the side so that he could kiss and lick the tender spot just below her ear. The bard let out a small moan as her Warden laid a trail of wet kisses down from her ear, across her slender neck and up the other side before returning to her mouth.

He broke their kiss and ran his thumb along her bottom lip. "I love you Leliana, my beautiful bard."

"I love you too Aedan, my gentle Warden," Leliana said as she playfully nipped his lip before kissing him hard. She felt his hands tugging at her robes and so she rose to make it easier to remove them. She shrugged the robes off her shoulders and tossed them aside and then began pulling at Aedan's shirt.

Aedan cursed to himself that his shirt did not button up the front and had to be removed over his head. He curled his torso up off the blanket as he raised his arms over his head allowing Leliana to remove his shirt. He then put one arm around his bard's waist and the other behind him and he pushed himself upright. Leliana now was on his lap and straddling his hips and their faces and more importantly mouths were level. He kissed her with renewed urgency for a time before his hands moved to untie her breast band. Once free his thumbs gently circled Leliana's hardened nipples drawing a gasp of pleasure.

In one swift movement her Warden pressed her even closer to him as he twisted and laid her down underneath him. He began to move lower. He kissed along her collarbone which always excited her. He caressed her breasts before finally taking one into his mouth, suckling it and then flicking the nipple with his tongue. He gently nibbled it as Leliana moaned a mixture of pleasure and pain. She grabbed the back of his head as she writhed beneath him. He moved to her other breast and continued without missing a beat. The bard pressed against his shoulders and Aedan moved lower, his tongue leaving a wet trail down her stomach. She giggled as he stopped to kiss and lick her belly button before continuing downwards.

Suddenly Aedan sat up, pulling Leliana's remaining small clothes and legs up with him. The bard cried out for her Warden to continue and not to tease her as he massaged her calves. She ground her hips invitingly, but Aedan refused to quicken his pace as he slowly caressed and kissed up her legs. He could be so frustratingly disciplined at times and she knew that Aedan wanted her as badly as she wanted him. It had been so long for both of them that she almost wished to force his hand. As he neared her sex Leliana held her breath, a throaty groan escaping when she felt her Warden's tongue begin to lick around her entrance.

Time seemed to stretch into one long moment of delicious, sweet torture as her Warden pleasured her first with his tongue and later adding his finger. She grabbed Aedan's free hand and brought it up to her breast where he toyed with her, rolling her sensitive nipple between his thumb and forefinger. Leliana's moans grew as her chest heaved and she alternately grabbed at the blanket and at Aedan's hair. Her pleasure built upon itself and at the crescendo she clamped her thighs around her Warden's head as she cried out in delight. He continued his ministrations as he slowly brought her back down to earth.

Leliana reached down and gently pulled Aedan's hair, signalling for him to rise. As her Warden moved up her body Leliana reached down between her legs to undo the laces on his trousers. She grasped his hard manhood with one hand as her other hand pushed his trousers over his bottom. She smiled as Aedan closed his eyes and moaned softly as she slowly stroked him. He braced himself on one hand as he tried to push his pants down with the other. With a curse he withdrew from her touch so that he could slip his trousers past his knees and finally completely off.

Again her Warden moved on top of her, his manhood at the entrance to her sex. They were both eager but he paused and looked into her eyes and smiled. Aedan said 'I love you' as he slowly entered her. She gasped with pleasure as she grabbed his back and urged her Warden on; he was taking far too long. He entered her completely and then slowly withdrew. Leliana raised her hips as Aedan thrust into her again. Gradually their pace quickened, slowed and quickened again, the bard meeting her lover's thrusts with her own. He would bring her to the precipice but no farther despite her pleas. She looked up at her Warden, seeing the sheen of perspiration on his skin and a look of joy upon his face that mirrored her own. The bard could feel her orgasm building as she locked her ankles around her Warden's hips. Her moans were silenced as Aedan leaned down and kissed her passionately as she felt him release inside her as she was overcome with her own pleasure.

After calming down from their lovemaking the pair fell asleep in each other's arms, both feeling content that fate had returned the other to their life.

Aedan woke before Leliana did and moved to his side so that he could look at her in all her naked splendour. Apart from her face which had a touch of sun, her skin was still the porcelain white he remembered. Her body was that of a dancer, all smooth curves and graceful lines with an underlying base of muscle that only enhanced her femininity. He watched his bard's chest rise and fall with each breath and watched as her full pouty lips inhaled and exhaled. He longed to kiss her but did not want to wake his bard up and break the spell. Wild thoughts came to mind as he looked at her and thought of their future together. He thought of abandoning his titles and duties and building a small house here in the Frostbacks where they could be happy and alone together, spending their days as they were now.

Leliana started to wake and her trained senses knew another was nearby. She braced herself and prepared to fight. The bard opened her eyes to see her Warden laying on his side and looking at her with a silly grin on his face and relaxed. She quickly ran her eyes across his body. Aedan was a lean and muscular man who seemed to radiate a sense of power and strength beyond what was implied by his frame. His blue eyes saw through you and shone with life and determination. She knew each one of his scars and wondered at the stories behind the new ones she noted. As a bard she loved the heroic and conflicted nature of her Warden: he was a warrior who longed to live a peaceful life; he was a hero many times over and yet always claimed it was others; he fought to serve and protect those around him and never for glory as a lesser man might; and he was a terror on the battlefield and yet so gentle and caring. She could not easily describe the many ways she loved him. Even as Aedan had told her the sacrifices a Grey Warden made and insisted she leave to think upon a possible future together she had known that there was no other for her. The agonizing months apart and her joy at seeing him yesterday had only confirmed it. Leliana again ran her eyes across his body, she could see the visible evidence that Aedan had been awake and watching her for some time before she woke. She quickly hatched a plan to take some revenge on her Warden for teasing her earlier.

"Did you have a pleasant rest my beautiful bard?" Aedan asked.

"Yes, one of the most peaceful I have had in some time," Leliana answered as she turned onto her side and leaned forward to kiss him. The fingertips of her right hand began to gently trace a pattern across his chest before continuing downwards. She heard her Warden moan as her hand reached its destination and began to stroke his already hard manhood. Leliana pushed Aedan onto his back and this time she trailed wet kisses down his body before finally taking his member into her mouth. She licked, stroked and sucked her Warden, using every skill and trick to bring Aedan to the brink but refusing to allow him release. She wanted him to suffer in his pleasure as he had done to her earlier. His moans and hoarse breathing were a sweet song to her ears and only encouraged her.

"Please Leliana no more. I can only think of darkspawn for so long," her Warden begged in a husky voice as he grasped her shoulders.

The bard laughed as she moved up and straddled her Warden, impaling herself upon him. She ran her hands across his broad chest and tweaked his nipples. Aedan moved his hand to her bottom as the other hand pulled her down to meet his mouth. They lost themselves to their passion and lust as Leliana ground her hips as Aedan thrust up into her. The bard felt the rolling waves of pleasure building inside her and arched her back. Her Warden curled himself up and suckled on her breasts as she surrendered to the throes of passion, her toes clenching the blanket and her fingers raking Aedan's back. She collapsed on top of her lover and after a moment to steady herself began again.

Aedan watched his bard's face which seemed to glow; her face and skin flush with excitement. She looked so beautiful and he could never imagine wanting or needing anyone but her. He surrendered to his bard completely – mind, body and soul - as she again bounced and ground her hips against him. His hands grabbed her hips and felt like they were burning from the heat of her naked flesh. He watched the sway of her breasts as she slammed into him with increased fervour. When Leliana panted that she was close he was relieved as he too was nearly there. With a throaty grunt he released his seed inside his bard as seconds later she cried out with her own sweet release. He pulled his bard down against his chest and kissed her in thanks.

As if to prevent another round they heard a mabari whine. They both laughed as they turned as saw a bored, neglected looking Elric.

"I am sorry boy. We'll leave shortly and get you some dinner," Aedan said. The hound barked his agreement and sat down staring at them as if to ensure that promise was kept.

"It seems our chaperone has disapproved of our constitutional," Leliana said with mock seriousness.

While it was clear that neither one wanted to leave just yet they both cleaned up as best they could and dressed. After a brief snack, shared with their chaperone of course, they began the trek back to Haven in considerably better spirits than when they had left.

Aedan remained in Haven for a week and while he left without his bard, knowing that she would be returning to him eased his thoughts. Leliana was leaving for the Grand Cathedral in Val Royeaux in a few months time with Brother Genitivi and some others by personal invitation from the Divine herself. While he would like nothing more than to go with his bard and have her show him the sights and where she grew up, his duties would not allow it.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten

27 Kingsway, 9:33 Dragon

Denerim

Aedan walked the streets of Denerim with his brother Fergus towards the palace. The Cousland brothers and only two Teryns of Ferelden were paced by their guards, a few of them obvious but most disguised as commoners moving in and out of their path. Even this late in the evening, after the parades and public ceremonies, there were still people out to wish them well and to see the nobility in their finest dress as they made their way to tonight's ball. It was the second anniversary of the day that King Alistair killed the archdemon and ended the Blight and all across Ferelden people were celebrating and none more so than those in Denerim.

Aedan felt embarrassed and exposed walking the streets as the people pressed in on him to offer their thanks, love and prayers. Alistair had been the one to slay the archdemon - not him - and he deserved all their thanks and prayers. While Alistair was held in reverence alongside his father King Maric and even Calenhad as a great king, Aedan was similarly held up as Ferelden's greatest hero. He knew that he had accomplished much in his young life, but as he reminded anyone who would listen he was not alone during any of his exploits. He had fought by and continued to fight alongside some of the finest people he had ever known.

The love of the country was not universal though, which was why the necessary precaution of the guards. Both he and Fergus had been trained as warriors and preferred a straight up fight, but experience and some trusted friends had shown Aedan the value of stealth and deception. There were some that were not pleased that Couslands held the only two terynirs in Ferelden and that Aedan, as Commander of the Grey Wardens, also ruled the Arling of Amaranthine. It was a lot of power, wealth and prestige held by these two unmarried, and presently unarmed (or so it appeared), brothers who were both without heirs, power that could be gained with two simple thrusts of a blade. Aedan had already foiled one plot where some Amaranthine nobles who had been loyal to the late Redon Howe had hired the Antivan Crows in an attempt to assassinate him. Bann Esmerelle of the City of Amaranthine had even been so kind as to hang herself, leaving behind a signed confession of her role in the failed conspiracy even though her co-conspirators had not betrayed her.

Tonight's ball at the royal palace was ostensibly to celebrate the end of the Blight and honour the sacrifices of those who died. Unofficially it served as a means for young, marriageable noble daughters to catch the eye, or manhood, of unmarried nobles. As Commander of the Grey and General of the Armies that had defeated the Blight it was expected of Aedan to attend. The Commander though would rather be back at Vigil's Keep among a small circle of friends who understood the sacrifices required of those brave souls who perished and the loss of his friend and King that he still felt keenly.

Aedan was weary from the long and bitter Landsmeet that had ended yesterday. Some of the other nobles had challenged Aedan over the expenditures to rebuild Vigil's Keep and some of his other policies especially regarding the elves. The loudest challenges had come from Bann Ceorlic of the Southern Bannorn. The man was an idiot just like his father who had betrayed the Rebel Queen Moira to the Orlesians during the occupation and who had produced a foppish son who was sure to carry on the family tradition. Ceorlic had been a steadfast supporter of Loghain during the Blight and was the disgraced Teryn's loudest supporter and one of the few dissenters to Alistair becoming King.

Aedan replayed yesterday's session in his mind as he walked.

"_I have heard many reports of the extravagant luxuries that the Grey Wardens are indulging in the rebuilding of their headquarters," Bann Ceorlic began. "While we all thank the Grey Wardens for their sacrifices and heroism in ending the Blight and saving the City of Amaranthine I must ask is this the best use of the funds and supplies that many here so generously provided during a time of need?" Cheers of agreement were shouted by others who sought to make gains at the Warden's expense and were opposed by others who supported both he and the Order._

_Once silence had again fallen Aedan began. "Vigil's Keep is one of Ferelden's oldest structures having been built by the Avaar during the height of the Tevinter Imperium and predates Denerim and Gwaren both. It has stood against the Tevinters, barbarian hordes, Orlesians and even the darkspawn broke against its walls. It is not just the headquarters of the Grey Wardens in this land, it is a symbol of the strength and durability of Ferelden. It is a piece of the soul of our nation and deserves to be restored to its former glory. Master Dworkin, a dwarven stonemason who oversaw the initial repairs to the Vigil that enabled the Keep to hold against the horde, is leading the repair and construction efforts. His skill and ability is without peer and he has my utmost confidence and support. By Master Dworkin's own words and deeds the Vigil will be rebuilt to the highest of dwarven standards and will again stand proudly just as our nation does. Unfortunately as we all know skilled craftsmen require time to work and do not come cheaply. It will be years before the reconstruction of Vigil's Keep is finished._

"_Grey Wardens risk their lives and sacrifice themselves on behalf of us all, but what of the innocent men, women and children who live and work at Vigil's Keep. Do they not deserve to be protected if, Maker forbid, there is another attack upon their home? Many good people died in the attacks on the City of Amaranthine and Vigil's Keep and it haunts me to this day. What kind of a leader would I be if I did not strive to ensure that their sacrifice was not in vain? If I did not make every effort to ensure that those looking to support the Warden's noble cause and provide for their families were safe? I want everyone here to know that I would spend my last sovereign and alone I would assault the Black City itself to ensure the safety of my country, the lands and people the Maker and our good Queen have entrusted me to steward, and most especially those that I love."_

_The Commander could see a few faces nod in agreement with his words. It was time to cut the legs out from under this fool._

"_I can assure you that any luxuries at the Vigil are modest and appropriate and should any of you doubt it I would welcome you to come visit and see for yourself. I do not recall ever seeing you there Bann Ceorlic, but perhaps you visited when I and some of my fellow Wardens were in the Southern Bannorn fighting bandits alongside your men while you were elsewhere." A few snickers and laughs disguised as coughs were heard as Ceorlic's son stopped his preening, looking embarrassed._

_The Grey Wardens had months earlier responded to calls for aid from the Southern Bannorn who claimed that they were being raided by darkspawn. The army of the bannorn was led by Ceorlic's son who bore the same name. Ceorlic the Fifth, or Ceorlic the even lesser as Anders had named him, was an incompetent fool who lead solely because of birth and not ability. Junior appeared to spend most of his time picking his clothes along with matching sword and he smelt of perfume so strongly that an enemy would smell him coming long before he ever saw him. Ceorlic the lesser fancied himself a strategist and refused to listen to the advice of either the Wardens or the experienced men he lead. Junior had almost got himself and many others killed by ignoring the plan and giving away their position to the bandits who were truly responsible for the raids. Oghren and Velanna had threatened to kill the fool as a result and once the bandits were defeated the Wardens had made a hasty exit._

"_I would also like the record to reflect that those who so generously came to the aid of Amaranthine in our time of need will always have our thanks and as others have needed aid Amaranthine has and will continue to render whatever assistance we are able." The City of Amaranthine and surrounding farmlands were bouncing back strongly and with hard work and the Maker's favour were quickly becoming more prosperous and abundant than they ever were under Howe. Had that foul wretch of a man been less covetous and more concerned with proper administration and eliminating the rampant corruption that ran throughout much of the Arling he could have bathed in gold and been beloved by the people. Perhaps then he never would have turned his eyes on Highever, though Aedan knew he would have found another reason. People like the late Arl were always quick to blame others for their problems and drew like-minded people to themselves like flies to shit. Luckily he, Fergus and Varel had foreseen this tactic and were prepared for it. "Any aid rendered in our time of need went firstly to rebuilding the City of Amaranthine and only food and medical supplies went to Vigil's Keep. The reconstruction of the Vigil has been financed solely through just and fair taxes as is my right as Arl, donations for Wardens in other lands, my own monies and lastly from some borrowings which are in good standing and being repaid as agreed. Records of receipts and dispersals of aid received have been filed with Queen Anora and are also at Vigil's Keep should anyone wish to challenge. To the best of my knowledge her Majesty has seen no fraud or irregularities with the information we have provided." The Queen herself acknowledged the truth of his words. "Should any wish the return the return of their generous aid I ask them to speak up now and I will see to it that he or she is compensated." The Commander's gaze scanned the Landsmeet._

"_And what of the elves? We hear that you allow the elves to carry weapons and join your army. That is madness," Ceorlic continued, refusing to give up though on this point there was wider support._

"_During the siege of Denerim the late King Alistair, my companions and I fought through the Alienage and we saw ordinary elves, men and women both, defending their homes and loved ones with wooden rakes and sharpened sticks because the law forbid them from owning weapons. I saw the same thing in the City of Amaranthine and know that it also happened at Vigil's Keep. Those brave souls fought to protect and defend themselves, their loved ones and Ferelden, while others, even some armoured and heavily armed humans, fled the field of battle like cowards." Aedan let his emotions show, "Their courage shamed me and it should shame you. _

"_Dalish elves honoured their ancient treaties with the Grey Wardens and their aid was invaluable in defeating the archdemon and ending the Blight. The Dalish came to our aid even though we run them off our lands and call them savages and knife-ears. Many think them criminals and unworthy - I however do not and count dwarves and elves among those I am fortunate enough to call friends. I believe that each person should be judged by his actions and the content of his heart and not by the shape of his ears or how tall he stands._

"_In the City of Amaranthine we have established a council of elves lead by their Hahren, or elder, to help oversee the alienage and work with the city's mayor and town council. A paid guard comprised of elves and under the command of Chief Constable Aiden, is also responsible for patrolling and keeping order in the alienage. Since the Elven Council and Alienage guard has been established crime has fallen and there is hope in the alienage where before there was only despair._

"_Grey Wardens have always accepted recruits without regard to race and status. There are dwarves and elves in the Order today and there will be more. It is fitting and appropriate that the Vigil's guards who fight alongside the Wardens be the same._

"_I cannot stand here and tell you that everything has been smooth sailing and that there have not been bumps along the road, it will take time but it is working."_

_Aedan stood proudly in front of the Landsmeet, scanning the crowd and by his look almost daring Ceorlic to continue. Any further response was cut off as Bann Thomas of White River, a bann with many elves and a proportionately large alienage, requested to visit the City of Amaranthine to see the progress for himself and obtain further details in consideration of doing the same thing in his lands._

"Aedan, are you even listening to me?" Fergus asked, bringing his brother out of his quiet contemplation. "I asked if you were as nervous about this damned ball as I am."

"Sorry brother, I was thinking about Bann Ceorlic and the Landsmeet. What do you have to be nervous about? You are still young and I have no doubt that many honourable, and hopefully some not so honourable, ladies will be practically throwing themselves at you." The younger Cousland knew that while his brother still grieved for Oriana and Oren it was no longer as all-consuming as it once was. For his brother's sake he hoped that Fergus would soon find someone that made him happy, he deserved it and he knew that Oriana would not have begrudged Fergus. "Just try to enjoy yourself and the rest will follow as it will."

The evening did unfold as it will with both Cousland brothers making conversation with their fellow Lords and Ladies and dancing with a few of the eligible daughters and even some wives. Aedan chuckled at seeing Fergus dancing with Habren Bryland, daughter of the Arl of South Reach, as he remembered during the Blight when they had first come to Denerim poor and starving and Leliana pick-pocketed the vain and troubled girl, swiping a tiara and some silver that had provided them with rooms and a few decent meals. He would have to remember to warn Fergus off of that girl.

"Is it true that you have a sword made from metal that fell from the stars?" asked Sophia, daughter of Bann Hamish Thompson of Black Rock, a small holding southwest of Lake Calenhad in the Frostbacks that drew its wealth from quarrying the rock that gave the land its name.

Aedan turned to face the young woman he was dancing the remigold with. She was certainly a beautiful woman with pretty green eyes and long curling black hair that reached almost to her waist and shone in the light of the braziers and lanterns. The touch of her under his hands only reaffirmed what was already clear when she had approached to ask him to dance - that her body had few equals. Her voluptuous body was on full display in a red silk dress that flattered her curves and emphasized her ample cleavage. The pleasure of conceiving an heir with Sophia would be such that many men would blindly agree to whatever terms her father requested after cutting off their sword arm just for the chance at gaining her favour. A few years ago when he was not as wise Aedan might have been wrestling to lead the pack of would be suitors.

"Yes it is true - my sword's name is Starfang."

"I would very much like to see your sword my Lord. Perhaps one evening you might show it me?" Sophia said coquettishly as she pressed herself against Gwaren's Teryn.

It was hard not to laugh at the girl and her clumsy and heavy handed attempts at seduction. His bard could stir his passion with a simple glance or with the fluidity and grace of her movements not to mention her clever wordplay. Leliana would never need to resort to such obvious and frankly embarrassing means. He chuckled silently to himself wondering what she could teach Sophia and how much more effective and impossible to resist this young woman would be under his bard's tutelage. Thinking of Leliana though only stirred his feelings of loneliness as he wondered how his bard was doing in Val Royeaux and when she was coming home to him, he missed her so much.

When the dance ended he begged leave of Sophia offering up some excuse and moved to speak to Bann Teagan of Rainesfere.

"I hear congratulations are in order Teagan."

"Not quite yet Aedan but hopefully soon, I have petitioned the Queen to grant my request to marry Kaitlyn and expect to hear shortly."

Teagan had by chance met and fell in love with Kaitlyn. A young woman Aedan had met when he visited Redcliffe during the Blight when it was under attack from walking corpses. Aedan and his companions had found her missing brother Bevin and after the village had been saved he had given the now orphaned siblings some gold to travel to Denerim. Kaitlyn was a smart young woman though and had invested the gold in a foundry which quickly made them wealthy and had brought her to court where she met her future husband.

"I am sure there will be no issue. You are a lucky man to find someone with such a good head for business, not to mention she is quite beautiful."

"I love her and we make each other happy, for me that is enough," Teagan replied, and both men knew it to be true.

There were rumours, which Aedan did not doubt, that Teagan's choice of bride did not sit well with his older brother, Arl Eamon of Redcliffe, as despite the wealth and property Kaitlyn brought with her she was not noble born and secured no alliances. He felt bad for Teagan who was a good man and deserved his happiness. Aedan's own relationship with Eamon, despite all that he, Alistair and their companions had done for his family and Arling during the Blight, was so poor that Eamon did not even speak to him, let alone acknowledge his existence. Eamon blamed Aedan for Alistair's death and would probably carry his anger with him until the end of his days. Whether Eamon had truly loved Alistair as he claimed was open to debate though all evidence proved to the contrary. Alistair would never have been mistreated, slept in stables or shipped off to the Chantry as an inconvenience had there been any true love. A more likely train of thought was that Eamon mourned the loss of power and prestige he would have had as advisor to and power behind Alistair's throne. Teagan though bore neither the Grey Wardens nor their Commander any ill will over the King's death and was a true friend.

He spoke to Teagan for a time and inquired how things were in Rainesfere and how Teagan's nephew Connor was doing at the Circle of Magi before being pulled away by Erlina, the Queen's handmaiden.

"My Queen wishes to know how you are enjoying this evening's festivities your Grace."

"It has been..."

"If I may be so bold my Lord," Erlina interrupted, "it would be best for you to tell my Lady these things yourself. Perhaps after you have asked our Queen for the pleasure of her company in a dance?"

Since it was never wise to refuse a Queen or keep her waiting Aedan excused himself from Erlina and went to ask her mistress for the honour of a dance, her first one of the night if he was correct. As he led her from the dais and onto the dance floor there were stares from many of the nobles.

He placed a hand at Anora's waist as his other closed around her dainty hand, he could feel her other hand come to rest on his shoulder as the musicians began to play. They danced alone on the dance floor and while Anora was the picture of grace and elegance Aedan felt oddly self conscious as it felt as though every eye were upon them and as he looked around that was indeed the case.

"How are you enjoying the evening my Lord?" Anora asked.

"It is lovely my Queen, though I pray you will not be disappointed if I admit that my mind wanders to Vigil's Keep occasionally."

"Is your mind wandering now?"

"No your Majesty, my full attention is here with you ensuring that my own clumsy attempts at dance do not embarrass the grace of my Queen."

"You malign yourself my Lord. I have seen you dancing with the eligible ladies at court and your training and skill is evident."

"As I was raised your Majesty, and upon Teryna Eleanor's insistence."

"Your mother was a great Lady and I think of her often. I am certain that both she and Bryce would be proud of all that you have accomplished and of the man you have become."

"Thank you for saying so your Majesty, you are too kind."

"And what does my Lord think of the ladies at court?"

"My Queen, some of the 'ladies' could no doubt give the women of the Pearl competition in their brazenness, though their manner lacks the honesty and professionalism of those working ladies."

Anora laughed at his comment and it was a true genuine laugh, the first he had ever seen from her. It suited her far more than the stiff formality she normally held herself to. Her laugh brought a sparkle to her eye that was really quite charming – it was a shame she did not let her unguarded side show more often as she truly was a lovely woman and this served only to emphasize the fact.

While Anora had never visited the Pearl before she had lived in Denerim long enough and had heard enough rumours of compromised nobles of both sexes to be familiar with the city's most famous and notorious brothel. She looked at her dance partner; this was how she liked him. He could speak with a silver tongue when required but when he felt strongly about something he was honest and not one to mince his words – a rare occurrence in the palace. She did find herself disappointed though that Aedan would be so familiar with a brothel.

"Does my Lord have much experience at the Pearl?" She saw a faint blush at her question and carefully watched him answer.

"During the Blight we helped the proprietor clear out some mercenaries who were abusing the women and creating a menace for some much needed coin, though at the time our funds were so low we probably would have done it for a free meal. Later I again visited to fetch a drunken dwarf and a lascivious elf that had each spent the night there sating their preferred indulgences, drink and women respectively. I do not begrudge the men and women their occupation and the proprietor Sanga seems to care and protect those she employs, but their services are not for me."

Faith restored Anora continued the dance, surprising herself with how relieved she was that Aedan was not the sort to frequent whores. As she moved about the room in choreographed steps and turns Anora lost herself to the moment. It _did_ feel good to be held by this man and she let her smile show.

The song finished and Aedan bowed deeply and kissed his Queen's hand. "Your Majesty thank you for honouring me with a dance," Aedan continued after noting Anora's smile. "If I may be so bold my Queen your smile suits you, perhaps you should dance more often? I daresay that I can speak on behalf of all Fereldans when I say that we are happiest when our Queen is happy."

...

"Fergus wake up," Aedan said as he knocked on the door to his brother's room.

"Leave me alone Aedan"

"It is not my fault you enjoyed yourself a little too much last night," he said as he entered his older brother's room at the Warden Compound just outside the main grounds of the Royal Palace. They had left late from the Remembrance Ball and while Fergus had a room at the Gnawed Noble it had been easier for all involved to sleep here where there was more than enough room.

"What time is it?"

"Near midday and well past time you should be up." Aedan had been cursed with the inability to sleep in and even after the late night he was awake an hour or so after dawn.

"I must still be in the Fade. My brother has turned into our mother and is nagging me to get out of bed."

"I wanted to tell you that I have been summoned by Anora."

"Have I been?"

"No the message was for me. I am just leaving now."

His curiosity piqued Fergus rose from bed and speculated as to the nature of the summons. His brother walked off wondering if he had stepped in the proverbial dung pit.

...

Aedan was escorted through the palace to a small office where he was announced to the Queen.

"You asked for me your Majesty?"

"Yes my Lord, thank you for coming," Anora answered formally. "Have you dined recently?"

"I am fine your Majesty."

"I was just about to take my midday meal, it will be no bother."

"Thank you my Queen, you are too kind."

Anora nodded to one of the guards who had followed Aedan into the room. The guard walked to the door and presumably notified a waiting servant. They spoke idly about last night's ball until notified that lunch was ready.

The Queen took Aedan's arm and guided him as they walked a few unfamiliar corridors to a parlour with a small, intimate dining table that had been setup for their meal. He was on guard as he held Anora's chair for her as she sat, this was unusual. He had taken many meals at the palace and never before had he dined in anything other than the royal dining hall with its long table. As the servants entered carrying their trays Aedan also noted that the guards were outside, leaving he and the Queen alone.

They spoke about the recently concluded Landsmeet and the progress of the Vigil's repair and it only served to put Aedan ill at ease. Surely Anora would not have summoned him here for that? It was only after the finish of their meal and with the table empty and little chance of intrusion that conversation changed.

"You must be questioning why I have summoned you here." Anora asked.

"I would not presume to dictate terms of my attendance to my Queen."

"Enough Aedan, I demand you speak freely," she said with exasperation.

"As her Majesty commands so shall I obey," he couldn't resist needling her. He grinned at her and saw her smile. While he no longer felt Anora to be as cold and calculated as he had back when they had rescued her from Howe's clutches she was still something of an enigma to him – at times showing he and his Order great favour and at other times treating him coldly and either dismissing or ignoring his counsel. Aedan was confident enough in his own standing and position that he felt his good natured barb would do no harm and might even cause Anora to slip in an extra detail or two.

"As you are doubtless aware there have been increasing calls for me to remarry."

Aedan knew the truth of that. It had been raised in the last two Landsmeet and he had also been commanded to attend a few dinners and participate in a few tournaments held for visiting Princes from Rivain and Antiva and a few Lords from Orlais and Nevarra all seeking Anora's hand in marriage. Aedan had known his role was to be the 'Hero of Ferelden' and serve as both a demonstration and reminder of Ferelden's martial might. Other Blights had ravaged across Thedas for hundreds of years whereas the Fifth Blight was contained in this 'uncultured and barbarous' country and defeated in just over a year from the battle at Ostagar. Anora had once boasted that his reputation and prowess alone was worth five legions of chevalier and so when called upon he demonstrated it, even though it rankled him.

"While you are still young my Queen, as past events in many nations have proven, Ferelden does profit by having a clear line of succession," Aedan answered. He hoped that they would not dig up the events of Cailan's death and Loghain's civil war. "It also helps prevent jostling amongst the nobility as potential suitors and would be successors scheme and battle to press their case and gain favour."

"And what would you advise?"

"I would not dare to so presume to offer my Queen advice but will merely state that far too often those of noble birth are not allowed the luxury to follow their heart and marry their chosen, too often politics and other considerations come into play. In some cases, like my parents, an arranged marriage does lead to a deep and abiding love, however we both know that is more the exception than the rule. As Queen any decision you make would be further compounded by needing to consider the welfare and security of an entire nation and all those who dwell within its borders. It is an important decision and not one to be made lightly or under the influence of self-serving nobles seeking to gain wealth and power for themselves and their house."

"That is sound advice from someone refraining to offer it," Anora said thoughtfully. "Did you know that there have been suggestions that we become betrothed Aedan? There are many who feel that the joining of the bloodlines of the Hero of Ferelden and the Hero of River Dane would result in many strong sons and daughters."

Aedan realized now that he had indeed stepped in the dung pit – how deep he wasn't certain yet.

"With all due respect, and not meaning any offense as truly you are a beautiful woman and even were you not a Queen any man would be blessed to gain your favour, that would be a mistake. As a Grey Warden I do strive to remain aloof from the politics of the nation as much as I am able as per the dictates of my Order."

He had in the past allowed his Seneschal for Gwaren to vote differently to his own vote on behalf of Amaranthine simply because in the matter under debate the best interests of the two territories differed. From the beginning his Seneschal Terrence had been commanded to act in the best interests of Gwaren. While they discussed and debated each matter prior to the Landsmeet if Terrence could prove the value of his decision Aedan would not countermand him. In most cases he either refrained from voting altogether or allowed Terrence for Gwaren and Varel for Amaranthine as his representatives to vote as each saw fit.

"Additionally and without giving any Warden secrets it is unlikely that I shall ever sire a child which would put the country no further ahead in the quest for an heir." He left out that while he had cause and Loghain had forced the issue by dictating that their duel was to the death, Aedan had slain her father. There was also the matter of Leliana and his love and commitment to her – Anora though beautiful would to his eyes never compare to his bard.

"Please do not misunderstand me Aedan," Anora said, again in her proper and cool formal voice. "I was not suggesting that you and I should announce plans for our wedding merely informing you of one of the many pieces of unsolicited advice I have received."

"I ask that you forgive my confusion your Majesty," Aedan responded. He felt certain though that this intimate meal and maybe even the dance they shared last night were not without intention – he was hip deep in the shite now.

Their conservation continued for a brief time before Anora remembered a pressing affair of state. Relieved to be away from the Queen and the suddenly too small parlour Aedan meandered through the palace, lost in thought.

He came across Erlina and as always greeted her respectfully.

"Bonjour mademoiselle Erlina, comment êtes-vous?

"I am well my Lord, thank you. I trust you enjoyed yourself at last night's ball?"

"Yes I did, thank you."

"My Lady spoke of how much she enjoyed the dance you shared." Erlina smiled as if she had shared a secret with Aedan.

"I too enjoyed our dance and suggested our Queen take more time to enjoy herself. Please forgive me Erlina but I have an urgent matter to attend to and must be off," Aedan said to excuse himself from further conservation. Erlina just told him that he was in fact drowning in shite. His deduction confirmed by Fergus after they had spoken privately.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

8 Bloomingtide, 9:34 Dragon

Denerim

"Good Morning my Lady," Aedan said before kissing the forehead of the woman lying next to him.

"Good morning my Warden," his pretty bard answered.

Aedan moved to his bard's full lips and kissed her again as he felt her arms move to encircle his neck. He deepened the kiss and parted her lips with his tongue.

Ever since Leliana had arrived at the Vigil before Satinalia last year the pair had been insatiable, spending as much time as possible together in bed. It was as if both were anxious to make up for all the time spent apart. It was a good thing that after the attacks on Vigil's Keep and Amaranthine Aedan and the precious few Wardens that survived had put near all of their efforts towards recruiting for both the Order and the Arling.

Aedan remembered well his father's words: _lay out a bountiful table to attract the finest men and women, train and provide for those under your banner as if each were family, and empower and trust them to succeed so that your lands run only with your oversight and not your direct involvement. _ Aedan wasn't quite there yet, he probably wouldn't be until after the repairs to the Vigil were complete, but he was farther along towards his goal than he ever dared dream in those first days after the defeat of the Architect and the Mother. The Vigil, and its temporary structures while repairs were underway, now housed a full complement of soldiers and household staff along with a growing number of knights and there were now twenty-five Fereldan Wardens. Without his bard to keep him company Aedan had thrown himself into his duties as Warden Commander and Arl and since Leliana's return to him he had begun to delegate some tasks to others, though he would never neglect his responsibilities. It was to those fine men and women, among many others, that he relied on and gave his thanks to and who were enabling Amaranthine to bounce back quicker than most were expecting.

Thankful for the unseasonably warm temperatures that had necessitated their sleeping _au naturel _Aedan began to let his hands wander along Leliana's lithe body. He gently ran his fingers along the familiar curves and watched as Leliana's body responded. She shifted her position, opening herself up for his hand to slowly drift lower. Their breathing became more ragged as the intensity and pressure of his finger increased. Aedan leaned in and kissed his bard before her cries carried beyond their room. The Gnawed Noble was a fine establishment, but it did not have nearly the privacy of their rooms at the Vigil.

After Leliana had caught her breath Aedan knelt between her legs. He hooked her legs with his arms and lifted her, aligning her sex with his already hard member. He entered his bard slowly and gradually quickened his pace, Leliana meeting his thrusts with her own. Their pace built and her legs wrapped themselves around Aedan's waist as he leaned forwards onto his elbows. The pair kissed hungrily even after they had each came and it was only a knock on the door that stopped them from continuing.

Aedan quickly threw on a pair of pants and simple linen shirt to answer the door.

"Good morning my Lord, I have come to prepare your bath," the elven maid said.

He had forgotten that he had left instructions last night for an early bath knowing that it was best to be done with it before the other guests in the inn were awake. _Oh well, at least now we both are in __need of a good washing_, Aedan thought to himself. He could hear Leliana moving in the background and knew it was safe to open the door to allow them access. In moments a train of servants were bringing buckets of hot water in to fill the tub. A once familiar routine that now looked odd to him.

The darkspawn attacks on Vigil's Keep aside from doing so much damage as to almost erase the memory of Rendon Howe in the building had allowed the reconstruction to take advantage of improvements in plumbing and dwarven ingenuity. Vigil residents and guests now no longer needed to carry buckets of water great distances as pipes and stone canals carrying fresh water now snaked throughout the stronghold from huge cisterns located in various places on building roofs throughout the grounds. Now one merely pressed different rune stones for hot and cold water to run from the taps and pulled the tub or basin plug for it to drain away down other pipes to different cisterns and eventually into the nearby river. Master Dworkin and his assistants had truly surpassed themselves and it was a wonder to behold and the envy of all who visited. The first time Fergus had visited after the system was up and running he had jokingly asked to join the Wardens.

Aedan pulled out some silver and passed over coins to the five servants who prepared their bath. Once they were again alone he and Leliana slipped into the tub together. It was a tight fit but neither one was going to complain and it wasn't until the water had gone cold and they had washed a second time that they exited the tub. Once clean and dressed they went downstairs to await Fergus and the other persons they would be dining with.

He knew what his intentions were regarding his bard and Aedan wanted to marry her. Knowing that any marriage of his would have to be approved by Anora, he and Leliana decided that he would bring her to the Landsmeet and introduce Leliana to the nobility and allow them to get to know her and for Leliana to charm them, and that is what she had been doing for the past two weeks. Leliana was like the sun burning brightly and eyes were drawn to her when she entered a room. While his bard might not be of noble birth she carried herself with all the class, dignity and grace of an empress born and it was apparent that she fit in well and would make a fine teryna. The rationale was to let Anora and the nobility see Leliana in this element and later to ask the Queen to approve their marriage.

Before coming to Denerim Aedan had not seen the Queen since their lunch and the awkward conversation regarding Anora's marriage plans last year. While he did not believe her claim that Anora was not suggesting they marry he had been earnest and honest as to why it was not a good match and hoped that seeing him with Leliana would give further proof to his words.

This morning they would be having their breakfast with Bann William Mackay of White River, his wife Theresa and daughter Diana who would be leaving later today. Bann William was an eloquent and cultured man who traditionally hosted one of the finest parties prior to each Landsmeet where much of the politicking and negotiating took place and it lent the man a certain influence and connection to a great deal of the nobility beyond what his station would normally have. His wife had a lovely singing voice, although not as good as Leliana's to his admittedly biased ears, and their daughter was a woman whose great beauty was matched by her intellect. While Bann William would be a strong voice in Aedan's plan to wed his bard, and he had little doubt that Theresa and Leliana would get along well, that was not the only reason while they were breaking bread together.

Fergus had spent a great deal of time with Diana at last year's Victory and Remembrance Ball and again during their time in Denerim for this Landsmeet. Aedan knew that his brother had also corresponded with Diana regularly and was surprised that the pair had not announced a betrothal yet. Certainly Fergus had a gleam in his eye when he spoke of Diana and the Commander knew his brother well enough to know that Fergus was smitten, and from what he had seen it was true for her as well.

...

Aedan held Leliana's hand as they walked through the marketplace towards where the tournament was being held. Beside them walked the newly betrothed couple of Fergus and Diana, with the formal announcement to follow in two months time in Highever. While the Commander was not competing there were three members of the Silver Order, so named from the silverite armour the Vigil's soldiers wore, and two junior Wardens who were. In addition to supporting his comrades, tournaments were a good place to scout for potential Wardens. This was the annual tournament in Denerim and Lord Fredrick Walken of Hercinia in the Free Marches was the honoured guest. This Lord was yet another in the line of potential suitors who had come to Denerim seeking Anora's hand.

Fergus and Aedan watched the archery competition with only mild interest while Diana and Leliana chatted with each other. Diana's excitement over her betrothal was readily apparent and seemed to be infectious as already the two women were discussing dresses, flowers and how best to decorate Highever castle for the wedding. Aedan hoped the day would quickly come when he see Leliana beam from ear to ear as they made plans for their own wedding.

With the archery competitions over the duels began and the conversation between the two Couslands waited until breaks in the matches. The matches would be a best of five with points for 'fatal' strikes or when an opponent yields and all using dulled blades. After the first round Aedan already had his picks for who would be in the final match, Ser Alec a knight from Vigil's Keep and a Rivaini man name Garrett who had come to Denerim with Lord Walken. The Commander knew Ser Alec's skill and ability firsthand as he had watched the knight train and spar regularly and had bested the knight in a few matches. Alec wielded a sword and shield while Garrett was a dual blade wielder. Since dual blades was Aedan's own preferred choice of armament it was not something that any knight or soldier at the Vigil was unaccustomed to facing, but Garrett used two hook swords, a weapon choice that even Aedan had only heard about.

Aedan mentioned his picks to Fergus who disagreed with both, favouring one of his own knights and a powerfully built knight from the royal guards. Fergus knew Alec was skilled but thought his own knight, Ser Richard, was superior and that Garrett was all showmanship with little substance. Certainly there was an acrobatic and crowd pleasing nature to the way the Rivaini used his swords, dancing about and spinning the blades round. However, if one looked closer the skill, agility and training required to use the hooked blades capably was apparent – they were similar to the Morningstar or flail in that a poorly trained wielder was just as likely to injure himself as his opponent.

Using the hook swords the outside of each blade acted just as any sword would; the hook could be used to slash, trap blades or trip opponents; the ends of the hilts were sharpened into daggers; the crescent guards could be used for blocking and slashing; and the two swords could be linked at their hooks effectively doubling the reach of the wielder to over six feet with the dagger hilt slashing opponents.

The tournament progressed and the men representing Amaranthine and the Warden performed ably with all reaching to at least the second round. Ser Richard of Highever made it to the semi-finals where he was defeated by Garrett from Rivain and the final match was set for Garrett to face Ser Alec of Vigil's Keep.

"Well brother, you guessed the final two correctly enough," Fergus said a little bitterly. He had hoped Ser Richard would win the whole thing. "Care to place a wager on the winner?"

"It will be Garrett," Aedan answered, surprising his brother with his pick that his own man would lose. "He is too fast and his attacks too unusual for Ser Alec to overcome. I would favour Alec against any other in the tournament _except_ Garrett."

As predicted Garrett made short work of Ser Alec, who congratulated the victor as a gentleman and knight should. The Rivaini stood in the centre of the match area and held up a hand to silence the cheers from the crowd.

"Thank you good people of Denerim," Garrett said. "While I have defeated many skilled and honourable warriors here today I am unable to feel deserving of being named tournament champion as I have not faced the best Ferelden has to offer." He turned to face the Warden Commander and Hero of Ferelden. "My Lord Cousland would you do me the honour?"

The crowd erupted in chants of 'Cousland, Cousland.'

Aedan glanced over to see Anora speaking with Lord Walken while using her hand to shield her mouth, he held up a hand for silence. "I regret that I must decline good ser. I had not planned on participating in the tourney nor would it be fair to you who has fought many matches this day while I am fresh. Congratulations Ser Garrett, you have won the day."

"I still wish to proceed my Lord."

"Then come visit Vigil's Keep as my guest and we can face each other when we are both at our best." Aedan did not fear this man or losing a match in front of the Denerim crowd and in truth wanted to learn to wield the hook swords, but Garrett had fought in five matches today and despite his bravado would be tired.

Aedan did have a competitive streak to him when he was younger. He had pushed himself hard and tested his skill against the best Ferelden had to offer in order to prove his worth to his father. That all changed though when Highever fell and he became a Warden. He still pushed himself as hard as ever although now he trained to protect those under his banner and to teach others. No longer did Aedan compete to prove his worth to others; he was confident and secure in his abilities and that was enough.

"Come, come Warden Commander," Lord Walken said over the jeers of those disappointed that Aedan was not prepared to fight, "the people wish to see you face this brave and noble man and as the guest of honour you risk offending me."

The Commander looked at Leliana. She knew he had nothing to prove and had been content to watch, but now that Walken had seen fit to interject himself he had little choice. That was one problem with being a legend in your own time, others sought to make a name for themselves at your expense. With a look to see the glare on Anora's face at the thought that he might offend her guest, Aedan stood to rousing cheers. He lifted the baldrics for Starfang and Vigilance over his head and passed his swords to Leliana; the use of enchanted blades was forbidden in this tournament. He pushed his way through to the match ring after testing several blades from the racks and selecting two longswords.

The two combatants faced each other and after a quick bow engaged. They both were a blur of motion with each man's twin swords slashing away at the other on attack and parrying quickly on defence. So far Aedan had been able to avoid having either of his blades trapped in the hooks. He had carefully watched Garrett's matches and even though prior opponents knew his strategy none had managed to avoid becoming entangled by the hooks.

Aedan was up two points to nil with one point coming after a skilful riposte that caught Garrett in the ribs and the other coming after his opponent linked his hook swords. Rather than moving backwards away from the suddenly longer reach of the linked blades Aedan held his blades up and tight to his body and stepped forwards, catching the hooked blades on his swords as they curled around him. He then proceeded to strike the wrist of his opponent's sword arm causing him to drop the linked swords. After a quick knee to the gut followed by a head strike with the hilt of his sword Aedan had Garrett flat on his back and yielding. While the score flattered him Aedan felt that the bout would be more competitive were they both rested, though he expected the result would be the same.

The two men resumed their opening positions and were about to engage when a voice rose over the noise of the crowd.

"HOLD, good sers," Lord Walken yelled over the crowd. "You were correct Warden Commander that perhaps Ser Garrett should have waited until he was properly rested before facing a master swordsman such as yourself. The odds do seem to be stacked against him and I had a thought that it would be appropriate to lessen your advantage." He gestured and two armed men walked into the ring and took up positions on either side of Garrett.

Aedan ignored Walken and stared at Anora. She was Queen and host of this tournament and with a word she could end this foolishness. He had not wished to compete in the first place and now was supposed to face three armed men to satisfy this fool of a suitor. Anora met his gaze and they stared hard at each other before she looked away, towards where Leliana was seated with Fergus and Diana. Aedan was not surprised when the Queen indicated the match should continue.

Were he not so angry Aedan would have thrown his swords down in disgust at the pettiness on display. Instead he shifted his position to avoid being flanked by the new entrants and nodded his head. All of the combatants knew that the tournament rules no longer applied. The two stooges of Walken's looked to be mercenaries and both wielded a sword and shield. They were of a similar size and look and on first glance the primary difference between the two was in the colour of their hair, one was blonde and the other a redhead. They also looked very confident that their superior numbers would prevail and the Commander had to disabuse them of that notion quickly.

Aedan stepped forwards to face Garrett directly, knowing that at least one of the two goons would try to move behind him. The blonde one on his left moved to flank him and Aedan quickly turned to face him while dragging his leg in an attempt to trip his foe. Blondie avoided the trip but was caught flat footed and left an opening for Aedan to attack. The Warden swept Blondie's leg at the knees as he quickly reversed his grip on the sword in his left hand and punched forwards with the hilt of his sword. A shower of crimson exploded from his face as Blondie took a hard shot right to the nose and dropped to the ground.

Aedan jumped over the fallen Blondie, putting him in front of his remaining foes; for good measure he stomped down on Blondie's midsection, driving the air from his lungs. Red charged forwards apparently upset over the Warden's harsh treatment of his comrade. Aedan moved to parry his thrust however it was a feint and Red came up with a high slash to his eyes that he barely managed to parry. Clearly Red was a swordsman and not an idiot like his friend.

The Commander was entirely defensive as he parried the attacks from Garrett and Red and worked to keep them together before him – a task easier said than accomplished however in this he was beginning to believe he had an ally. Garrett's attacks and parries while still skilful were not as quick as they were before their match was interrupted. The Rivaini was also leaving small gaps in his defence to be exploited that initially Aedan had assumed was bait to draw him in. Taken together they were subtle signs, easily missed by all but a master swordsman that Garrett was asking the Warden to beat him in such a way that he might salvage some honour from this match and avoid the displeasure of his patron.

Garrett overextended on a lunging thrust, partially blocking Red and leaving him open for a strike to the back. Aedan happily obliged and struck him reasonably hard on the back of the head with the flat of his blade, just in case he was wrong about the Rivaini. He backed off to see if Garrett would continue and was pleased to see that Garrett was remaining on the ground. It was now just Red and him.

Now that he was no longer outnumbered Aedan relaxed a bit and continued to force Red to come to him. The Commander deftly parried Red's attacks and savagely returned them. He was taught never to play with an opponent, but this one time he was going to ignore his training. He was going to make Red suffer and with it Lord Walken and Anora by proxy. Aedan wondered if Zevran was hidden among the crowd watching and what he would say – the elf always took great delight in talking to his opponents, taunting them with his superior skill and teasing them like a worm on the hook. Most became so upset at Zevran's antics that they flew into a rage and practically threw themselves onto his blades. Aedan wasn't prepared to taunt his opponent with words although he did ably demonstrate to Red that he was hopelessly outmatched and the fact that he had twice now waited for Red to recover was a form of taunting.

Aedan caught Red at the wrist forcing his opponent to drop his sword. The Commander circled away, avoiding the shield bash, and motioned for Red to pick up his sword. He could see by Red's face that the desire to continue fighting had long since gone; he had a few small nicks and his shield arm hung heavy from the pummelling Aedan had given to both it and his shoulder. The smart thing to do was concede unless Lord Walken expected him to fight to the death and that was something Aedan was not prepared to do.

Against all logic Red picked his sword up and squared himself to the Warden. It was hard not to have some admiration for this stubborn man who refused to submit. He knew that Red was desperate and a desperate man could be counted on to make a fatal mistake. The Commander circled Red letting the weight of the crowd and the anger of his patron fester in his opponent until it became too much and he would strike.

"EEEYAA!" Red screamed as he lunged forward and thrust his shield out point first at the Wardens head.

Aedan ducked to avoid the shield while knocking aside Red's sword with one of his own. The other came up to rest against his opponent's neck.

"Do you yield?" Aedan said loudly. Red gave a slight nod as he dropped his sword.

The crowd exploded in cheers for their victorious hero. Aedan wanted none of it. The Commander walked over and stood directly in front of Walken and Anora. He gave them each a look that clearly showed his anger and disgust over what had occurred here and then stabbed his swords into the ground and walked away. Leliana was waiting for him and together they returned to their room at the Gnawed Noble.

Several hours later there was a knock on their door from an unexpected guest. Garrett game to apologize for his challenge and confessed that he had been in Walken's employ as a sword for hire and had been put up to it. Though Garrett did not wish to call out Aedan he did as he was commanded, although the addition of the other combatants was a shock to him. To Garrett while the circumstances were not ideal he had viewed it as an honour to test himself against Aedan whatever the outcome. Aedan invited Garrett Vigil's Keep to teach both him and any others who wished how to wield the hook swords. Garrett had not accepted but Aedan was a good enough judge of character that he would not be surprised if the Rivaini ended up at the Vigil in the near future. The Commander would let Garrett get a sense of the brotherhood between Wardens and belonging to something greater than a purse of gold before offering a position in the Order.

Fergus, alone now that Diana had left with her parents, accompanied Leliana to dinner with Teagan and Kaitlyn after Aedan said that he would make poor company and insisted they go without him. In truth he had other plans and once Leliana and Fergus were away Aedan again put on his armour and swords and left for the palace.

With each step towards the palace Aedan's anger over the day's idiocy grew. Four men had been placed in danger and for what - the petty machinations of a foreign noble and the whims of a selfish queen? Had he been watching himself from afar Aedan would have seen people either knowingly or subconsciously moving to avoid his path, recognizing danger when he neared.

He stormed through the palace into the throne room and finding only the Chancellor he demanded an audience with Anora.

"My Lord Cousland it is late in the day, perhaps you could come back tomorrow during court?"

"I will not be put off ser. This is a personal matter and cannot wait until tomorrow," Aedan said sharply. "Either her Majesty will see me tonight or I will search the palace until I find her. _Now go and get her_."

The chancellor was at a loss. He was a decent man although holding to custom and formality with a zeal that bordered on obsessive. Due to his position he was also a man who was used to getting his way. It wasn't appropriate for anyone to come to the palace and demand an immediate audience with the Queen except in an emergency which clearly this was not – such things were just not done. And no one further threatens to rampage through the palace until they found her. The chancellor looked at the Teryn and Warden Commander; studying his stance, manner and face before deciding that it was best to speak to the Queen.

"Please wait here my Lord and I will go speak to her Majesty and inform her of your urgent need."

Aedan wasn't sure how long Anora made him wait. Certainly long enough that the guards in the throne room were nervous. Finally Erlina, the Queen's handmaiden, entered the throne room and said she was there to escort him to Anora.

Erlina led him on a circuitous route through the palace while she talked idly to him. Erlina was a smart woman and no doubt decided that a winding path might bleed off some of his anger and unlike some nobles Aedan had never been anything but polite and courteous to her. By the time they had finished his anger while still present was controlled. He thanked Erlina for her company before passing over his swords to the guards outside the door. Erlina announced him and Aedan entered a small, for the palace, sitting room with a roaring fire and Anora facing the fire with her back to him.

"You wished to see me Lord Cousland," Anora said in a tone that implied she was annoyed at the interuption.

"Yes your Majesty, I wish to speak to you about today's events," he waited until the Queen turned to face him. "Never again."

The words hung in the air between them.

"Never again for what?" Anora said, some of her composure slipping.

"Never again will I be subject to the foolish plans of an asshole seeking to embarrass me and gain your favour. Never again will I dance to your petty tune like some puppet on a string."

"I am you Queen," Anora screamed at him as she moved to stand directly in front of the Warden.

"Then act like one," Aedan screamed back. "Walken told Garrett to challenge me and no doubt planned that if his man was nearing defeat he would spring the others on me. You could have put him in his place and stopped it and yet you did not. Do you wish to see me humiliated or brought to heel? What do you want from me?"

Anora quickly leaned in and kissed him, wrapping her arms around his neck. Aedan's body responded before his mind could catch up. He raised his hands to grasp Anora by the arms. Anora mistaking his intent deepened their kiss until he pulled her away, her mouth tugging on his bottom lip as if refusing to let go.

"I am sorry Anora but that is something that I cannot give to you," Aedan said quietly. "My heart already belongs to another." He took a small step backwards.

"And yet you once told me that nobility rarely gets to follow their hearts and must do what is best for their people," Anora said bitterly. "Why should you be so fortunate?"

"I am doing what is best for Ferelden because as a Grey Warden it would be a miracle for me to produce a child from my loins. Also as a Grey Warden I am doomed to die an early death either in battle or alone in the Deep Roads underneath Orzammar. Yes, I am indeed fortunate to be so blessed."

Aedan left Anora and walked first to the stables to have the horses prepared and then back to the Gnawed Noble to pack their things. They would be leaving Denerim tonight and he had Leliana had much to discuss.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Erlina led Lord Cousland on a twisting path through the palace towards her mistress all while regretting the Queen's stupid actions this day. She could practically feel the heat of his anger radiating off his body and though she knew Lord Cousland would never harm her lady she knew that if her mistress was to salvage any hope of gaining her desires that she could not bring him before her like this.

The Queen had dismissed the vainglorious Lord Walken after their dinner, feigning a headache, and had only just arrived in her private chambers when the chancellor had come stating that Teryn Cousland was quite insistent that he see her Majesty this evening. Erlina had seen the man's face blanch when the Queen had informed Chancellor Tadg that she would see no one this evening '_unless the bloody archdemon itself was sighted in the city._' Tadg had shown his resolve though by stating that if the archdemon were to look upon Lord Coulsand this evening it would surely retreat back to the abyss and insisting that the Teryn would not be put off. The Queen had relented but not before making Lord Coulsand wait while Erlina fixed her hair and makeup and she perfumed and changed into a new gown – to minimize the residual stench of Walken before meeting a true gentleman the handmaiden thought.

Erlina had liked Lord Cousland from when she had first met him to plead for her lady's rescue from Arl Howe. Even though he had not trusted her, assuming her Lady was in league with her father and the Arl, he had been polite and respectful towards her. Those qualities were always on display whenever she had cause to speak with the Teryn. While many men and women, even in positions not nearly as lofty as those he held, treated her as nothing more than a servant at best, he was only ever kind to her and treated her as an equal. And it was not just her but every elf that was fortunate enough to make his acquaintance. The elves who worked at Vigil's Keep were paid according to their skills and always in the same amount as humans. All the families of the soldiers and workers were provided for and their children taught to read and write (along with many of their parents).

The same was being done in Gwaren although there the Teryn did not employ anywhere near the army of workers required to rebuild Vigil's Keep and the City of Amaranthine. A few minor lords and merchants from Gwaren had come to visit the Queen, whose father had previously held the terynir, to seek her assistance in speaking with their new teyrn and 'bringing him some sense' as their increased labour costs were eating into their profits. The Teryn had not mandated any Gwaren nobles to follow his lead but was clever enough to know that once word of his largesse spread the nobles would either have to follow suit or find their supply of elven workers dry up. Erlina had overheard when her lady had brought the subject up with the Teryn who had simply replied that 'an honest day's work deserved an honest day's pay regardless of race.' And that in the absence of a royal decree ordering him to pay the elves less, something that the Queen could never do what with her father having sold elves into Tevinter slavery, he was not prepared to change his practices.

This man walking beside her had done more for her people in a few short years than had previously done in her lifetime. For her people's sake she wanted her mistress' plans to succeed and for this decent, honourable man to become king, knowing that from the throne there could be no greater ally for the elves. And yet the Queen's petty nature may have ruined any chance of that happening.

As Erlina continued to lead them through the halls she thought over how they had come to this place.

The Queen had originally been furious with Warden Cousland after the Landsmeet where she was deposed and Alistair was made king. In truth Erlina wondered whether it was due more to the loss of title or the death of her father. Certainly Teryn Loghain had named the terms of their duel, knowing that death was the likely result anyway for the vanquished. She had watched, safely hidden in the royal entrance, as the Warden and Loghain battled before Cousland had gained the upper hand. He had disarmed and beaten the Teryn and yet held his blade and asked Loghain to yield. That was when Alistair and the older Warden began to argue over inducting Loghain into the Wardens, with the King strenuously objecting.

While the other two Wardens were arguing Warden Cousland looked to the beaten Loghain and with his expression asked whether he could serve in the Wardens. She saw Loghain shake his head no and then ask in a clear voice for all in the hall to hear, "_Warden, for the man I once was I ask that you give me a clean, honourable death as a warrior rather than leave me to be hanged in the city square as a traitor._"

Warden Cousland had then kicked Loghain's sword back to him and allowed him to rise. The Teryn had lunged forwards in a clumsy attack like some untrained novice and Cousland slipped behind Loghain and slit his throat with his dagger, killing the Teryn quickly and relatively painlessly. The Queen had later thanked Lord Cousland for granting her father that small mercy.

In hindsight, that act and his subsequent appeal to the Queen to seek reinforcements from Orlais should Ferelden's Wardens fall in the final battle had planted the seeds of desire in her mistress. Certainly he was an attractive man and the time spent training and fighting had given Lord Cousland a physique that men envied and woman longed for, but it was more than that. Lord Cousland challenged and stimulated her Lady in a way that no one had ever done before – he was her equal in many ways and her superior in others.

Part of that challenging though had been in resisting her Lady's attempts to entice Lord Cousland to court her. The Queen, a beautiful and powerful woman, suffered the curse that many women in her position fell prey to – she was accustomed to getting her way with little effort and that included having many men seeking her favour. When presented with a man who resisted her charms, like Lord Cousland, the Queen was at a loss at how to proceed. To gain her desire the Queen would have to become the hound and chase after her fox – quite different from her normal role, forever teasing and tempting the hounds chasing her and remaining just out of their reach. Her Lady had many times summoned the Warden Commander and teryn to Denerim to display the suitors who sought her hand in an attempt to arouse his jealousy and spur him into action. When that failed she alternated between showing Lord Cousland her favour and her displeasure with little rhyme or reason.

It was Erlina who suggested that perhaps her mistress might allow Lord Cousland to see another side of her. The handmaiden knew that Gwaren's teryn was at his core a man of action and she remembered the red-haired woman who had been his companion (discrete inquiries had confirmed that she was no longer in Lord Cousland's company and that no one had replaced her in his bed) had been a woman of great martial skill. It was in this vein that the Queen outfitted herself in her finest armour and sword and travelled to Vigil's Keep to respond to the darkspawn attacks. There her Lady saw Lord Cousland in action, dangerously wounded and yet risking all to defend his Queen and those under his protection. The Queen had returned to the palace disturbed by encountering the darkspawn in person and by the devastation wrought by their attacks and yet confident that Lord Cousland was the right man to rebuild the Arling and join her in building Ferelden's future. In the months that followed the Queen and the Teryn grew close as they worked together to solicit aid and see to the rebuilding of the City of Amaranthine and Vigil's Keep. Her Lady had wisely avoided any romantic overtures and allowed their relationship to be built on friendship. Erlina had rarely seen her mistress Anora as happy as she was on those evenings after her meetings with the Teryn when she would prepare her Lady's bath and brush her hair, all while listening as the Queen discussed their plans.

Erlina had taken a chance at last year's Victory and Remembrance Ball and arranged for Lord Cousland to ask her Lady to dance, deciding that they both needed the spurs put to them. She had been overjoyed at seeing the happiness upon Queen Anora's face as she danced with her heart's desire. That happiness had soured the next day though when the Teryn had provided reasons why a relationship with the Queen would be a poor idea. If what Lord Cousland said was true, and Erlina had little reason to doubt him, he was correct that the last thing her Lady needed was a husband who could not sire a child. There were many rumours before King Cailan's death that his Queen was barren and that she should be set aside for another, more capable. Erlina, as perhaps Queen Anora's closest confidant, knew that her Lady was aware of her late husband's many dalliances outside their marriage and the embarrassment, pain and shame they had brought. It was unfair that the lack of an heir was placed solely upon Anora's shoulders. Cailan had rarely warmed her bed nor had any of his numerous mistresses produced a child either.

Now, in the post-Blight climate, there were again many in the nobility who whispered that the most important role their Queen had was in producing an heir and in this task she was failing Ferelden just as she had failed King Cailan. There were whispers that Queen Anora knew she was barren and was drawing out the search for a husband in an effort to secure the reins of power. And now there were calls for the Queen to marry and they were quickly becoming shouts as each day passed without news of a royal marriage.

The pressure was on her Lady to find a mate, any acceptable mate, and yet the Queen resisted the calls because _the heart wants what the heart wants_. Queen Anora in her still young life had already been in one marriage that was based more on politics and friendship than on love and was determined that history not repeat itself. Erlina knew that while her Lady enjoyed administering the kingdom as it suited her natural talents she had also been desperately lonely. And even though Cailan had repeatedly broken their marriage vows, Anora had refused to cuckold him despite the many handsome and willing men who had sought her affections.

After their intimate lunch Queen Anora had been upset by Lord Cousland's 'spurning' her affections and steadfastly refused to believe that perhaps he acted in her best interests as well. Erlina had politely suggested that she have someone contact the Orlesian Wardens, the Ferelden Wardens were too loyal to their Commander not to discuss the matter first with him, to determine if Lord Cousland's words regarding his virility were true. It had taken many months for Erlina to wear her Lady down but eventually in the middle of this past winter a messenger had been sent, although no answer had been received as yet.

Erlina had listened to her Queen lament the absence of Lord Cousland as he found ways to avoid Denerim and his Queen. Her Lady spoke increasingly of uniting the two bloodlines of Ferelden's greatest heroes and that surely such a union would produce fine sons and daughters that would rival even Calenhad as Ferelden's greatest rulers. The handmaiden had to admit there were certain romanticisms to the Queen's thoughts and it would also remove much of the taint regarding her rule – that her father had died in disgrace as a traitor and a regicide and that she had been passed over for a Theirin bastard who had never been acknowledged much less trained to rule.

Queen Anora had vowed to speak plainly with Lord Cousland about her affections and intentions at this Landsmeet, just concluded, and had been determined that he not leave Denerim without an announcement of their betrothal.

Of course that was before the Teryn arrived with a companion.

While the Queen might not have recognized the Teryn's companion as the woman who had fought at his side against the Blight and had stood vigil over him as all wondered whether he would live, Erlina had remembered her. Erlina had recognized the woman instantly after being dispatched under the pretext of delivering a message to Bann Mackay's estate on the eve of his ball after the Queen had heard rumours that Lord Cousland had brought a mistress with him. The Lady Leliana had stood out among the nobles as surely as if she had been surrounded by pigs. Even from a distance the handmaiden could see that Leliana was a beautiful woman who carried herself with a confidence and grace that few could equal. The jealous eyes of men and women followed her as she moved around the room; the women recognizing their better and the men wishing they were her man.

In the time she lingered at the ball Erlina could see that Leliana was attempting to charm the nobles and she appeared to be succeeding. Had he not been the object of her Lady's desire Erlina would have lauded the couple for taking this tack. Certainly with her Orlesian accent and apparent lack of noble birth, to say nothing of his titles, any future plans together would not only need the approval of the Queen but at least a tacit approval of the Landsmeet. Clearly they sought to defuse that potential blockade before approaching the Queen.

In her heart of hearts Erlina knew after seeing Lord Cousland together with Leliana that her Lady's plans would be for naught. While she may be a Queen and could offer a kingdom in return for his love it would never be enough for this man. Nor could the Queen compete with the history those two shared. Yet she was sworn to serve Queen Anora and Lord Cousland was who she had chosen and was also a man worthy not only of being her husband but of being King, and so Erlina would do as her mistress bid her. Presently that meant calming the Teryn so that her Lady might be able to salvage some hope for her plan's success.

"How goes the rebuilding of Vigil's Keep your Grace?" the handmaiden asked.

"It proceeds well. The main buildings have been rebuilt although still require much work within although those who make the Vigil their home are now housed inside. The temporary labourers and craftsmen are still housed in the great halls and small homes that dot the landscape although some have moved to Soldier's Peak to make repairs there. Our focus now is on finishing the battlements, walls and outlying structures as well as the insides," the Teryn answered.

"Word in the Alienage is that you pay the elves the same wages as humans and provide for their children to be taught to read and write?" Erlina asked, already knowing the answer but seeking to drive the Teryn's thoughts towards helping people and away from what had brought him to the palace.

"Yes," Aedan answered softly. "Sadly, when news of this spread many came seeking work without any available for most, but we took on those we could. Were it not so novel to expect those of different races to paid equally for the same labour many could have saved themselves the hardship of travel."

Erlina heard the frustrated and sad tone of his voice and knew the Teryn spoke truthfully and not just because he was speaking to an elf. "If I may be so bold my Lord, I thank you on behalf of all elves for your efforts on our behalf." She watched him wave off her thanks as if they were not necessary to do the decent and proper thing.

"And is it true that Vigil's Keep has water delivered straight to tubs and baths without anyone needing to carry buckets from the well or warm by the fire?" Erlina asked sheepishly.

"That is indeed true," Aedan answered as he let out a great laugh. "It is a subject that gets brought up often and visitors stare in wonder as water runs from the taps." They both shared a laugh at the image. "Surely the Maker has blessed me to know such fine architects and craftsmen whose skill and ingenuity know no limits. While the effort and cost bordered on obscene the end result was more than worth it and everyone seems to enjoy it."

"Perhaps you might speak to our Queen and suggest that the same improvements might be made to the palace?" the handmaiden asked hopefully, risking speaking of the Queen.

"Unfortunately, I was told that it was only due to having so much of the Vigil destroyed that allowed the pipes and troughs to be laid throughout the Keep. I am afraid the craftsmen might say that it cannot easily be done short of tearing the palace down. Should the Queen wish I will of course have Masters Dworkin, Traven and Paolo come to Denerim to offer their opinions."

"I would very much like to see this wonder."

"You are more than welcome mademoiselle to visit the Vigil as my guest," Aedan answered.

Erlina knew the Teryn would welcome her warmly should she decide to visit; how her Lady was welcomed however was still to be decided. They continued on through the palace discussing mundane matters before arriving at the sitting room where the Queen waited. Erlina had done her best; the Teryn no longer seemed to radiate heat from his anger, the rest was up to her Lady to try and clean up this mess she created. The handmaiden was not truly surprised when Lord Cousland gave her a knowing smile before handing over his weapons to the guards – he had known what she was doing all along. She smiled back and opened the door to announce the Teryn.

Erlina waited outside the sitting room and said a silent prayer to the Maker for her Lady's success. She halted the guards from disturbing the Queen as her voice rose in a shout. She remembered seeing Lord Cousland accept the Queen's slaps and blows without response and knew that he would do so again.

Far too quickly the door opened and Lord Cousland exited. Erlina looked upon his face, his eyes refused to meet hers, and she knew all that she needed to know. The handmaiden wiped away a tear before composing herself and entering the sitting room. The Queen was slumped over in a chair holding her head in her hands. Erlina quickly poured a glass of Antivan brandy for her mistress and carried it over.

"Here my Lady, drink this," Erlina said as she put one hand on the Queen's back and the other pressed the glass towards her. She groaned silently as the Queen tossed it back in one pull.

"He refused me again Erlina," Anora said, and the pain of rejection was clear in her voice.

"Did he provide a reason my Queen?"

"He says that his heart belongs to another and spouts the same drivel about Warden's being unable to sire a child." Anora threw the empty glass into the fireplace where it shattered against the burning logs.

"What can that red-headed whore offer him that I cannot?" The Queen asked sharply as she stood up, causing her maid to fall back onto her haunches as if cowering in fear. She knew that she had been petty at the tournament and should not have indulged Lord Walken, but the sight of Aedan happy and laughing with that woman when she had been planning to confess her feelings to him had been too much to bear.

"I do not know my Lady."

"I offer him a kingdom to rule at my side and still he spurns me."

"Were he the kind of man tempted by power and riches he would not be the man he is my Lady." Erlina could see the tears welling up in the Queen's eyes.

"Please leave me Erlina."

Erlina began to leave to give the Queen her privacy but paused before opening the door. "Do you require anything first my Lady?"

"What I need you cannot give me," Anora said softly although with her keen elven ears Erlina heard.

Erlina excused herself and retrieved a chair from a neighbouring room and brought it out into the hall, placing it outside the room where the Queen wept. The handmaiden sat down as she prepared to stand vigil for her Lady and she began to cry for the Queen and for the Teryn. _Wherever you are Leliana I hope you know how much Lord Cousland loves you and pray that you are worthy of him._

...

"Aedan stop!" Leliana shouted as she slowed her horse. They had fled Denerim like thieves in the night, offering vague excuses to Fergus to explain their sudden departure, and Aedan had set a brisk pace towards the Vigil. Even without being able to read her lover's face like an open book she knew something was upsetting Aedan terribly. They had sworn to keep no secrets from each other and whatever the problem in Denerim was they were far enough away now that he could talk to her. The bard got off her horse gracefully and began to walk him off the road knowing that Aedan would follow.

"Please Leliana let us keep going," Aedan said.

"The horses are tired and I refuse to go one step further before you talk to me Aedan. What happened while I was at dinner with Fergus?"

Aedan sighed knowing he had put off this conversation as long as possible and at the very least they were alone. "I went to see the Queen."

"Oh you didn't," Leliana said. She feared what Aedan might have said to the Queen or worse yet done to Lord Walken in the mood she had left him.

"I had to tell Anora that I have had enough of her silly little games."

"And what was her response?"

"She kissed me."

Leliana was shocked at that answer. Certainly she had heard the rumours after the darkspawn attacks on Amaranthine that Aedan and the Queen were lovers, but she had asked her love about them and he had said they were false. She knew this man and knew the value of his word and yet she could not help the spark of jealousy his admission stirred in her breast. "And did you kiss her back?" She watched as Aedan averted his eyes and knew the answer even before he spoke.

"We had been yelling at one another and it was so sudden and unexpected." Aedan reached out and clasped her hands in his and Leliana tore them away and turned her back to him. "I am sorry my love but my body responded before my mind could catch up. Yes, I kissed her."

"Do you love her?"

"No," Aedan said firmly. He gently clasped the bard's shoulders and leaned in to whisper words in her ear that he hoped would explain the depths of his feelings for his beautiful bard. Leliana turned and her tears were like wounds to Aedan's heart but his bard kissed him with a passion that rivalled their first kiss.


	13. Chapter 13

_A/N: For those of you who are also reading my other ongoing story Betrayal of Love and Trust there will be an update no later than Sunday even if I have to chain myself to the PC._

_I would also like to give my special thanks to a talented and generous lady - Liso66 - and would voice my encouragement to give her stories a read._

* * *

Chapter 13

27 Drakonis, 9:35 Dragon

Outside Highever

Aedan woke, dressed himself and opened the flap to the tent he shared with his bard and took a deep breath, inhaling the mixture of smells that to him meant home – from the salty smell of the Waking Sea to the smell of wet dog. Although in this case the smell of dog was due to the approaching form of his mabari Elric who he had earlier let out into the rain.

He watched the powerful muscles of his hound as Elric bounded through the puddles and wondered why all foreigners claimed they smelt wet dog when in Ferelden even on a sunny day. It was only in the last few days and after many weeks of hard travel during the last vestiges of winter and the first rains of spring that he had noticed the smell. And if he was being honest the hound was not the only one in their party who needed a good bath. The rivers and streams were still too cold for bathing and only so much could be accomplished with a warm pot of water and cloths.

_If the rains don't get much worse we'll reach the castle by midday and we'll be home_, he thought and he was glad that warmth touched his heart. Certainly when he and Leliana had left for Weishaupt Fortress last fall there was a part of him that was glad for a reason to leave Ferelden behind. Back then his life had quickly soured after the fiasco with the Queen and his admission to his bard of the kissed he had shared with Anora. First there were reports of riots in the Alienages of Denerim and some of the Bannorn that he could not help but feel responsible for as they were for better wages and improved rights like what he and a few like-minded others already provided. Then not one month later word came from the Circle Tower that Wynne had fallen ill and wasn't expected to live much longer. By the strange twists of fate that always seemed to surround him, Zevran had again flittered into their lives as he was wont to do and quickly four friends, Leliana, Zevran, Oghren and himself, along with Elric departed to spend whatever time was left with their old companion.

They had stood silent at Wynne's bedside, all initially too shocked to do much else after seeing her pale and withered form until the elder mage finally shouted them out of their depths and insisting "_I have led a long and good life and have been fortunate to have made so many dear friends. This is not a time a sadness, but rather it should be a time of celebration of a life well lived and of the best of friends." _And so properly chastised they made it so for her. Aedan had wrapped Wynne up in warm blankets and had carried her outside so that they could sit under the sun and the blue sky. A lunch was ordered from the kitchens and along with Irving, some of the other Senior Enchanters and her favourite students they had sat and shared stories from the Tower and their travels during the Blight. They had all laughed at the memories of Alistair "accidentally" leaving his clothes and socks that needed mending someplace where Wynne was sure to find them. They had laughed harder still at Irving's stories of prim and proper Wynne who as an apprentice had been such a joker that among other things she had often practiced her fine control of elemental magic on the templars. Apprentice Wynne would try and raise or lower the temperature of a nearby templar's armour - not enough to do them injury but just enough to make them uncomfortable in their heavy plate. Of course if it was subtle and gradual enough the templars would not think twice about it and were too proud to ever let their discomfort show and so would stoically stand there suffering in silence.

They had promised Wynne there would be no tears and there weren't; not until night had fallen and she had taken her last breath and again when she was placed on the pyre.

Looking back now it was strange that Alistair's death had brought them all closer and yet Wynne's had seemed to drive them apart as they had quickly separated on their own paths.

For Oghren he had given him leave to return to Felsi and his daughter Aedina for an extended visit. Aedan knew that in times of death we often sought solace in the arms of our loved ones and while all Wardens were brothers and sisters they would never compare to a wife or a daughter and he had told the dwarf not to hurry back. To this day he still cursed himself and Oghren both for the dwarf's Joining. Had the need not been so great and had he questioned more vigorously or the dwarf been more honest he never would have let Oghren undergo the ritual. "_Ah, she threw me out Warden; said she'd had enough of me."_ Of course he had failed to mention his daughter and Aedan happy to be reunited with a friend and knowing the hot and cold nature of Oghren and Felsi's relationship had not thought to ask. At least Aedan had managed to convince the dwarf to be a part of his daughter's life and he hoped one day Oghren would relent and finally move his family to the Vigil.

Zevran stayed with them until Highever where they scattered Wynne's ashes, feeling that although Wynne loved the Circle it was more appropriate that her mortal remains were free of the tower as she now was. Aedan could swear that he had seen tears in Zevran's eyes though of course the elf claimed it was the wind and then drew in on himself and had eventually left in the middle of the night leaving only a note. The former Antivan Crow, who had been trained to kill since childhood, was not someone who dealt with the death of those closest to him well. And for all his one-sided flirtations and silly banter with Wynne over her "magical bosoms" the two had been close and her death had hit Zevran hard. Both he and Leliana had provided whatever comfort they could for him and again he had offered Zevran a place at the Vigil as a Weapons Master and teacher and again the elf had declined. Though Aedan considered Zevran family and thought the reverse held true, the elf enjoyed his freedom too much and Aedan secretly felt the elf feared putting down roots. Instead Zevran would continue to drift in and out of their lives, spending months at the Vigil training Wardens before leaving for a time when the wanderlust struck him. During those times Zevran would send the occasional letter and Aedan had contacts that could get in touch with Zevran if there was a need, and neither doubted the other would always answer.

When Aedan had confessed his kiss with Anora to his bard he had again professed his love for Leliana and she had responded with a passionate kiss and yet as the days passed there seemed to grow a wall between them. They had begun to drift apart and the passion they shared waned. And then came word of Wynne's illness and they were thrown together again for a time.

Wynne's death affected both Leliana and Aedan strongly as each viewed her in a motherly way. For Leliana, Wynne reminded her of Lady Cecile who had cared for her as a daughter after her mother had passed. For Aedan, who met the elder mage so soon after his family was murdered, she had become a grandmother (although he would never say that to her face) or a favourite aunt who could be counted on to provide support and wise council or speak the hard truths that he had needed to hear to drive him forwards on their quest to end the Blight. They had each been strong for their friends but once alone Aedan and Leliana had quickly retreated into their own grief and the wall separating them had grown taller. For his part, Aedan had been pained by the growing distance between them and had wanted nothing more than for things to go back to how they used to be. At times he had caught looks from his bard that led him to believe she felt the same way and yet they both were too uncertain and too afraid to take the initial step. When he had received the summons from Weisshaupt Aedan had been afraid to speak of it with his bard. He had feared that his departure would be the last time he ever saw her and he had been surprised when Leliana told him that she wished to join him on his journey. And so together along with Elric they had travelled first to Highever to speak with Fergus and later board a ship crossing the Waking Sea. They had departed Ferelden that day as little more than travelling companions.

Yet that ship, the _Radiant Dawn_, was where his luck began to change and his life moved towards balance as his love was about to be reborn stronger.

Aedan was born with a love of the sea as all proper sons and daughters of Highever were and had looked forward to this part of the journey, thinking it would remind him of his summers of adolescence. Both he and Fergus had grown up in the sea and had spent the summer of their sixteenth year working at the Highever docks and had crewed on a fishing boat owned by a family whose loyalty was without question. The Teryn had wanted his sons to have some understanding of the workings of the terynir beyond the castle walls and along with farming (their fourteenth and fifteenth summers were spent working on a farm) fishing and trade were a substantial part of Highever's wealth. While those summers working in the fields and at the docks had ensured that the Cousland sons had a strong work ethic, that summer had also affirmed Aedan's love of the sea.

If he could he would have ventured out into the Amaranthine Ocean, north past Rivain before heading west past Par Vollen and Seheron to Minrathous and then overland south to the headquarters of the Grey Wardens, but relations between the Qunari and the Tevinters were always tense and the risk of such a long journey over water was great. Instead they had planned to travel to Cumberland and then follow the Imperial Highway north through the rest of Nevarra into Tevinter before cutting west to Weisshaupt.

Unfortunately, Leliana had never spent more than a pleasant day upon the water and the deepest parts of the Waking Sea were anything but calm. The first day after leaving Highever the storms had found the _Radiant Dawn_, perhaps echoing the hearts of the ship's passengers. The rolling waves and the rising and falling of the bow of the ship had been so great that even the crew had been sick – poor Leliana who had already begun to feel seasick before the storms had never stood a chance. With Leliana sick, this time Aedan stood vigil and cared for her as she had done for him after the final battle with the archdemon. He brought his bard her meals; he washed her and combed her hair; and he even cleaned up on those few occasions when Leliana could not make it to the chamber pots quick enough. At the time Aedan had feared overwhelming Leliana with his near constant presence and yet as the days passed he began to see his bard smile again and he knew that his efforts were appreciated. The day before they made port the storms had finally passed and that night Leliana came to him and they made love; the first time since before Wynne had passed.

They had left Cumberland with an understanding that neither wanted what they shared to end and that they were both willing to work hard to save it. Aedan and Leliana had once sworn to never to keep secrets from each other and they had not, but they left Cumberland after making a new oath to one another and that was to speak truths – an infinitely harder thing to do.

And so they spoke honestly to each other about their pasts, their fears and their hopes.

Once he had told Leliana that her past before Lothering did not matter to him and in truth it didn't, but those nights along the Imperial Highway he had listened as his bard shared her sad tales of the men and women she had bedded, killed or robbed. He listened as her relationship with Marjolaine was described in more detail than she had spoken of before. With clenched fists he again heard of Marjolaine's betrayal of Leliana and her companions, Tug and Sketch, and the suffering and degradations she had suffered at the hands of cruel men before fleeing to Ferelden and the Chantry. Even now months later, if he thought on her suffering Aedan wanted to turn towards Val Royeaux and kill everyone who had ever hurt or laid a hand on her.

Aedan had already told Leliana of the night Howe attacked his home and killed his family, but on that road so far from home he shared his greatest shame over that night. Even as a child he had never liked Arl Howe, there had always been some shifty about the man, and that day at seeing his surprise that a Grey Warden was in castle and hearing that the Arl's troops were delayed he had thought something was wrong. While he had suggested that their own troops wait for the Arl's before leaving for Ostagar he had not pressed it with his father, and felt he had inadvertently provided the perfect opportunity for the attack that no one had expected. Instead, upset that he was being left behind he had sulked over his misfortune and flirted with an elven handmaiden, eventually bedding her that evening. Aedan would never force himself on a woman and Iona had freely given herself to him, but he still battled the guilt that were she not in his room that night that Iona might have found a way to survive and were she not in his bed that he might have been more alert and somehow raised the alarm or else prevented the deaths of his family and friends.

He had confessed to Leliana that because of his guilt he had later sought out Iona's daughter Amethyne in the Denerim Alienage. Had he not been a Warden he would have taken Amethyne into his household although he had still been tempted. Instead after speaking to hahren Valendrian he had found that Shianni had taken the girl into her home and was raising her. Since then he had helped to provide for a girl that he had never even met before that day. That night when his home was attacked he had seen the dead faces of people he had known for most of his life as they moved through the castle towards the larder, and yet along with the faces of his parents, Oriana and little Oren, a younger version of Iona, as he had imagined Amethyne to be, had haunted his sleep during the Blight as often as the archdemon. He knew that he had failed that little girl as surely as he had his own family.

Aedan spoke of the hard choices he made during the attacks on the Vigil and Amaranthine, the feelings of failure and regret he still felt that so many under his protection had died. The sorrow that gripped him as each Warden recruit took a sip of the poison that would grant him or her either a quick death or a slow one that still came far too soon.

They shared their fears with one another.

For Leliana it was a fear that her 'common' birth and life as a bard made her unclean and somehow unworthy of his love. She feared that if Aedan ever knew the full truth of all she had done in service to Marjolaine that he would cast her aside in disgust. Aedan had always suspected this, which was why he assured her that her past before they met didn't matter. It had hurt them both when Leliana had spoken of her bardic life; Leliana felt the pain of remembrance and Aedan felt the pain that his love was forced to relive the worst times of a life best left forgotten, as he knew that that life no longer belonged to _his bard_. She had also voiced her fears that she could not compete with the attentions of a queen and that Aedan would leave her regardless of what he had promised her – "_Who never dreamed of being a king?"_

Aedan shared his fears that his life revolved around killing, lamenting the blood on his hands. That everything he touched from Highever and Amaranthine to trying to improve the lot of the elves seemed to lead to death and destruction despite his best intentions. His fear that duty to the Wardens and to Ferelden would always take precedence and eventually drive him away from everyone he loved. And Aedan spoke of his greatest fear - that Leliana was wasting her life on a man who could never provide her with a child of her own and would die an early death either in the Deep Roads or more likely far sooner by some darkspawn's blade and that one day she would realize this and leave him alone.

Each night on their journey they had talked, sharing themselves fully and day by day they removed each stone in the wall between them and started to rebuild their love for one another. Now back in Ferelden and so near to his home, Aedan knew that their journey had been a crucible for he and Leliana and that both they and their love had emerged stronger for it. Their companionship that had seemed so oppressive when they had first departed was now something to be treasured and soon to be missed as they traded a life on the road for one at the Vigil and the duties and responsibilities it held. While Aedan had no doubt that he and his bard would travel together again it would never be as carefree and joyous nor would they ever be as alone as they had been on the latter part of this journey.

Aedan turned to look back at his bard still under their furs and blankets. "Have I ever told you how thankful I am that you get seasick my love?"

"Aedan," Leliana said exasperatedly.

"It's true, otherwise we would have boarded a ship in Val Royeaux and never had these last few weeks free from all our responsibilities." Leliana gave him the smile that was his alone and he knew that despite his teasing she felt the same way.

"Are you in a rush to set out?" Leliana asked as she shifted and let the blankets fall, exposing her tender flesh.

"It is very tempting to delay here with you, but we are so close to home. How about a deal my beautiful bard? If we press on to Highever we can be there by midday and then we can have a proper bath together and afterwards fall into bed and ravish each other until we are sweaty enough that we'll need another." Aedan knew he had her when Leliana reached for her shirt and so he set out to see to their horses.

...

They rode through the town towards the castle and even though it was not until a month's time on Summerday he could already see that preparations were beginning for the upcoming wedding of Highever's Teryn and Lady Diana of White River. Fergus and Diana had pushed back the date of their wedding until they were certain he would return from Weisshaupt and Aedan was glad that both he and Leliana could be here early enough to provide whatever support was needed for the bride and groom.

A few townsfolk offered their greetings while many others waved in acknowledgement and Aedan politely returned them all. Though he would never wear the mantle of 'Hero of Ferelden' well, here in Highever it did not seem to chafe as much, as he was born one of them and regardless of where he laid his head at night he would always be one of them.

They made their way past the castle gates and into the inner courtyard and saw that Fergus stood under cover waiting for them, doubtless notified of their arrival by the guards who manned the city gates. Highever had learned a harsh lesson from Howe and never again would the city or its teryn be caught unaware.

Aedan got off his horse and passed the reins to the waiting stable boy and no sooner had he helped Leliana down than he was swept from his feet and crushed in a mighty embrace.

"Brother, it's good to see you."

"It's good to see you as well Fergus." Aedan answered as he clapped his brother on the back.

"Leliana," Fergus said as he practically pushed Aedan aside to gather her in an embrace.

"Hey brother, are you not to be married soon? You had best let my woman go now before I speak to Diana about this."

"She's not here yet for you tell. My bride and her family should arrive next week but some guests think that they are family and arrive over a month in advance of the blessed day." Easy laughter passed between the trio. "Come let us get inside and out of the rain," Fergus said, ushering them inside. "No doubt you'll both want a bath and some dry clothes. I've already asked for one to be prepared in your room. Or if a bath can wait, you've missed the midday meal but I'm sure that Rosie can fix something up."

Aedan shared a look with Leliana and tried to stifle a laugh before answering, they both wanted a bath and were hungry, but what they desired was not to be found in the castle's kitchens. "A long bath sounds great and if it's alright with you I think we would like an afternoon of rest to put the road behind us."

"I'll tell Rosie that we'll be having a late dinner then," Fergus replied. His unvoiced suspicions confirmed as the pair walked away hand in hand and leaving him with a hound that seemed to like the idea of a trip to the kitchen. "Come on then Elric, I doubt that you've forgotten the way."


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen

Aedan awoke before dawn to a mass of flame red hair splayed across his bare chest. He took a moment to savour his feelings: the excitement of being home again after a long journey; the warmth of the tender flesh of his bard pressed against him; the strangely energetic feeling of tiredness from an afternoon and night of passion; and most importantly the happy feelings and secure knowledge that he and Leliana were once again on solid foundations that nothing could ever break.

He inhaled deeply, smelling the flower scented oils and soaps that clung to his love even over the smell of perspiration and sex that seemed to hang throughout the room. In truth those same flowery smells often clung to him, what with how often he and his bard shared baths. He chuckled silently as he remembered Oghren's teasing that real men smelled of sweat, ale and steel, and his half-joking response: "_I smell like flowers because I bathe with a beautiful woman who has refined tastes while you bathe alone and stink of ale and piss. Of the two of us I think I am far luckier, and any who doubt my manliness can feel Starfang's bite."_

Certainly he and his bard had taken advantage of her oils, the hot bath and even hotter bed yesterday. All were a welcome change after those many nights of travel and neither had been anxious to leave their room. Fortunately in that they were aided by a discreet knock last night upon his door. Aedan had quickly put on some clothes and answered the door, expecting to leave word that that he and Leliana would be down shortly for dinner with his brother. Instead he had found an empty hall and a tray with their dinner.

He should probably feel embarrassed, both that they were so easy to read and also over their rudeness in not joining Fergus, but instead he felt a profound sense of gratitude towards his brother or whoever planted the idea in his head that they be given one last night before the world intruded.

Both he and his bard were early risers and had often made a game of who woke first as they both enjoyed watching the other sleep. The slow riser would wake to find eyes upon them and shortly thereafter a kiss upon their lips; a perfect way to start a new day. Now their game had changed as their relationship had changed. They still joked over who woke first and still met the other with a kiss, but then they would rise and watch the dawn in each other's arms. Some mornings the young lovers were so remote from any settlements that they had simply wrapped themselves in furs and walked outside without dressing, but such behaviour would be scandalous now.

Aedan gently ran his fingers down his bard's spine and he felt Leliana stir. "Good Morning," Aedan said, as he leaned down to kiss her upturned face. "It's almost dawn."

The pair quickly dressed in simple clothes – leather pants, linen shirts and heavy cloaks – and after equipping their weapons went up to the battlements of the castle.

They faced east and Aedan clasped Leliana's hands in his before wrapping his arms around her as she leaned back into his chest. The first rays of light were just beginning to break over the horizon and they continued to watch as the sun rose, lighting up the sky in a myriad of reds, yellows, oranges and pinks.

"So much has changed since we were last here," Leliana said softly, echoing the thoughts of her Warden.

"Only for the better."

"Yes, for the better," the pretty bard agreed, and then looked up to kiss her man.

After a few minutes of cuddling the pair left the battlements to return to their room to retrieve last night's dirty dishes and return them to the kitchen. Once that was done they went out to the practice yard for some exercise after which breakfast and another bath, and sadly only a bath, awaited them.

...

The younger Cousland followed his older brother into Fergus' study, although for both it would always be their father's. The brothers sat down facing one another and began to discuss the news and events that had transpired when the Warden Commander had been away.

"So how was Weisshaupt brother?" Fergus asked eager to change subjects now that Ferelden had been discussed in detail.

Aedan had to pause to gather his thoughts as there was no easy answer to that question. He along with the other the Warden Commanders had been summoned to Weisshaupt by the First Warden. As the sole Warden to have survived the Blight and as the Commander of the forces who defeated the Architect and the Mother he was ordered to give a detailed report of the Ferelden Wardens actions since Ostagar and of the new breeds of darkspawn they had encountered.

To that end he had prepared to the greatest extent he could, soliciting accounts from both his fellow Wardens and others who had fought on the roof of Fort Drakon and in Amaranthine alongside them. To an extent it had irked him as he had already sent volumes of reports and notes to Weisshaupt and had corresponded with several of the other Warden Commanders across Thedas, with a couple even travelling to the Vigil. Wherever possible he had reused the initial accounts, leaving in their original dates, as if to comment that he had already answered these questions and was not negligent in his responsibilities. He gave his reports and told them of his travels during the Blight and here Leliana's gift of a bard's eye for detail and knack for telling tales helped as she also spoke to the leaders of his Order. He spoke of the new breeds of darkspawn the Architect had created: the Mother, Disciples, childers and the like, and he provided detailed descriptions of their strengths, weaknesses and likenesses. The last provided by copies of the drawings Sigrun had made.

He had been further irked to find his every decision second guessed by men and women who had the benefit of hindsight and time and were further sheltered by their distance from Ferelden. Other than Riordan, the Orlesians and a handful of others who had come after the archdemon and the Architect were defeated, no one had offered any support to a junior Warden and raw recruit who had survived Ostagar, and then went on to defeat a Blight nor in the months that followed as he struggled to rebuild the Order.

By more than half he was the youngest Warden Commander in all of Thedas. Although from discussions Aedan would guess that he likely had as much, if not more, experience against darkspawn than the others, even excluding battling the archdemon. Had the First Warden or any of his fellow Commanders assumed that his relative youth would mean he was easily intimidated or browbeaten though he had quickly proven the strength and tenacity of his Cousland blood and the native stubbornness that was common to all Fereldans.

Aedan had argued over his decisions not to conscript any of the companions he and Alistair had travelled with during the Blight and whether they had learned any Grey Warden secrets. He argued that it was a moot point anyways since at the time neither he nor Alistair had known how to prepare the mixture that all Wardens drank during their Joining. After the final battle he had offered a place in the Wardens to those he had thought most likely to accept: Oghren, Sten and Zevran, but he had not pressed them to accept. In truth he had grown to care for each of them in the way that can only come from adventuring together and relying upon each other for their lives, and while he would have taken them gladly he had not been disappointed at their refusal. Aedan knew the sacrifices that each Warden made and coming so soon after the final battle and Alistair's death, he had been loathe for anyone to join but those expressly desiring to.

He lost his temper on the Second Warden, a woman of Anders descent, who had been his greatest detractor (and was quite insulting, even going so far as to intimate that Aedan lacked the courage to make the final blow on the archdemon) after she had declared that he should have torched the City of Amaranthine to defend Vigil's Keep.

"_Torch one of the county's largest cities? Are you mad? This was not some small hamlet already lost to the taint, but a city of tens of thousands that was fighting for their lives." Aedan yelled at Second Warden Irmhild. "A city that as Arl of Amaranthine is under my protection and for which I am oath and honour bound to defend. Could you really give the order to put thousands to the flames and then walk away hearing their screams? _

"_People wonder why the Grey Wardens were exiled from Ferelden for over two hundred years. Were they to hear your calm words that I should have sacrificed so many innocents they would only wonder why our Order was allowed in __**any**__ nation. While I regret the loss of life suffered in the attack on Vigil's Keep that fortress was at least defended by strong walls and even stronger arms._

"_We are sworn to fight the darkspawn and protect the people of Thedas from their foul taint at all times, not just when it is easy. You can never convince me that I erred in taking the hard path to defend a city under my protection and slaying the darkspawn that threatened it."_

To say that Irmhild was a forgiving person would be a gross falsehood and they had proceeded to shout at each other until the First Warden had finally told them to settle it in the sparring arena. It was there that Aedan proved to all watching that he was Warden Commander of Ferelden by skill and ability, not just because he was the sole survivor of the Blight as he defeated the Second Warden rather handily.

After that while his decisions such as killing the Warden blood mage Avernus and destroying both his and the Architect's research were questioned the tone and phrasing of their questions was much improved. He had not liked the direction of the questions from some of his fellow Wardens which had only reaffirmed that he was correct in destroying most of the research lest someone else carry on with it. While Aedan was not averse to researching the taint, he felt any such research should be restricted to only specific areas: improving the odds of a successful Joining; increasing a Warden's virility so that he or she might still be able to become a parent; and/or lengthening the time granted before a Warden has their Calling or even avoiding it entirely.

In fact the lack of research into the nature of the darkspawn and the taint within each Warden's blood had profoundly shocked him when he had asked the First Warden. Perhaps as a conscripted Warden who was not even twenty at the time of his Joining Aedan had a different perspective than the others who had all been tainted much later in life. Certainly it was possible that had he another decade of life before his Joining he might not feel the weight of his sacrifices, the shortened lifespan and the impossibility of children, so keenly.

Perhaps it was due to his noble upbringing or from finding out so many Warden duties and secrets after he had already grown somewhat accustomed to the role, but there were a number of things he discovered that had disturbed Aedan. For one he had been surprised about the political interference that Weisshaupt exerted over the Anderfels. For an Order that allegedly strived to remain outside politics the First Warden and his seconds seemed to take great efforts to hamstring the local rulers, ensuring that the power and influence of the Grey Wardens would dominate Anders society.

He knew from Mistress Woolsey and others that the First Warden was hoping that the granting of Amaranthine to the Order would encourage other nations to follow suit. In many lands the Wardens were often forgotten until darkspawn surfaced or a Blight threatened the land. One way to combat that indifference and ensure that the Warden's duty and sacrifices were not forgotten was for Wardens to be granted lands and titles. Of course this would also lead to greater prestige, power and influence for the Order as well. A further benefit would be that outfitting and maintaining its ranks could be done without levies upon the crown or local lords.

And yet it was hard to reconcile that desire with the attitudes and manners of the Weisshaupt Wardens. Their heavy handed dealings with the Anders nobility, talk of sacrificing entire cities and conscription without regard for politics was at odds with the duty and responsibility of a title and stewardship of lands. He had often felt conflicted in trying to maintain the impartiality of his Order and yet doing what was best for both Amaranthine and Gwaren. There had even been times when Aedan had doubted whether granting Amaranthine to the Wardens had been beneficial to both Ferelden's Wardens and the people of Amaranthine, and Weisshaupt had only raised more doubts.

Another significant lingering doubt over the Order was in the makeup and nature of the literally hundreds of Wardens he had been introduced to and in some cases befriended. While Aedan had met some who he would continue to correspond with and who he had invited to Amaranthine, there were some like Irmhild and several others who if he never saw them again in this life or the next it would be too soon.

Wardens were recruited from all walks of life and for each their past was their own once they had successfully undergone the Joining. Grey lore said the taint united and bound each Warden together and yet Aedan could not help but feel somewhat disappointed in many of the Wardens he had met. There were some who still carried the look and mannerisms of street thugs and murderers and others who looked upon Leliana with such lecherous eyes that he had almost feared for her safety even knowing that she could more than handle herself. Elric had picked up on his thoughts and had practically never left the pretty bard's side.

Aedan recognized that not every recruit could be a knight and that in order to succeed the Wardens needed a broad mix of skills and abilities. Yet he always put a great deal of thought into and sought out the advice of others regarding each recruit's abilities, temperament, mannerisms, skills and whether the potential recruit would fit in among those already in the Order before offering anyone a place in the Wardens. He firmly believed that there had to be more to a potential recruit than asking whether he was skilled and strong enough to survive the Joining, and it was quickly apparent that not all Warden Commanders shared his views. While Duncan had certainly recruited thieves, such as Daveth who had died during Aedan's own Joining, he believed that his predecessor put sober thought into his decisions. Certainly Daveth had not only fought well but had seemed to possess the mindset Aedan was looking for.

By the time he and Leliana had left Aedan was glad that at least in Ferelden the Grey Wardens would be comprised of strong men and women who though coming from different backgrounds and experiences would all view becoming a Warden as both an honour and a sacred trust and duty. The only person he had conscripted, Nathaniel Howe, had certainly come to feel that way although perhaps he would not be so lucky with his second conscript.

"Cold...surprising...disturbing...inhospitable and yet there were many who I would gladly have at my back and call friends," Aedan answered his brother. He went on to describe many of his dealings with his fellow Wardens and both his and Leliana's experiences. Some like making love to his bard high up in the abandoned griffin aeries, while definitely a highlight, were omitted.

"Was it even worthwhile?" Fergus asked knowing that Aedan would not have told him everything. Occasionally he and his brother argued over the Wardens and their damned secrets, but he knew the value of Aedan's word. He also knew that if the matter was serious enough his brother would find a way to satisfy his oaths and yet still provide information to him.

"It was although not for the reasons I was summoned. I managed to get approval for my idea of the Grey Wardens accepting deposits and acting as intermediaries for traders travelling between nations. It will only be done in the major capitals and at the Vigil for Ferelden." This was good news for Highever as owing to its closeness to the Vigil it would likely see an increase in its exports.

In the aftermath of the darkspawn attacks on Amaranthine several traders had been ambushed by bandits and robbed of their goods and gold. As Arl and recognizing that at the time both supplies and gold had been in short supply, Aedan had loaned to and personally guaranteed the trading of goods to some traders. He had later come up with the idea that since there was a Warden compound in every major capital that perhaps the Order could act as a trade intermediary. For a reasonable fee (at both ends) the local Grey headquarters would accept a deposit of gold from a trader and in exchange would provide a letter of credit that could be redeemed at their destination. In this way a merchant could avoid much of the risks of travelling with chests of gold: bandits, pirates, shipwrecks, etc. He had corresponded with many Warden Commanders seeking their opinions and agreement. At the same time he had spoken or written to Anora, Fergus and several of the nobility and merchant guilds who relied upon trade for their thoughts and approval. It had taken many months of travel and hard negotiation for an agreement to be reached (pending approval from Weisshaupt) and the Vigil, which was quickly developing into a trading hub, had to agree not to trade specific goods and to provide this service only for those traders travelling outside Ferelden. As his intent was never to compete directly with the other trading hubs of Ferelden or with its merchant guilds the price had not been too great. There were also technical matters resolved at Weisshaupt that he knew Fergus would find fascinating, but as they dealt with Warden secrets Aedan didn't elaborate.

While the final agreements had not been everything he had hoped, it had been more than he had expected, as all saw the potential for greater profits and trade. For the Wardens they provided a service for some coin that was always needed and gained some influence.

"That is good news, I will send word to the local guilds," Fergus answered. "And did you visit Alistair's tomb?" He knew his brother still missed his fellow Warden and had spoken of one day making the journey to pay his respects to his fallen friend.

"Yes, Alistair has taken his place alongside the others who ended a Blight and is accorded every honour the Grey Wardens can bestow. There is a statue of white marble that perfectly captures his likeness and is taller than three men above his tomb. And yet for all its grandeur I can't help but feel that it lacks his heart and the innate goodness that was so much a part of him.

"Certainly the statue at the Vigil or even the simple cairn here in Highever seems to capture his essence better."

Aedan had commissioned a statue of Alistair that resided in the Audience Hall of the Vigil and had personally built stone cairns on one the cliffs overlooking Highever and the Waking Sea. He built cairns for Alistair, Duncan, Riordan and later Wynne, although he had gone to a stone mason for the white marble covering stone and inscriptions.

He took a moment to remember the inscriptions:

_Alistair Theirin; King of Ferelden and Grey Warden; Slayer of the Archdemon Urthemiel and Ender of the Fifth Blight; 9:10 – 9:31 Dragon._

_Duncan Sinclair; Commander of the Grey; Son of Highever; Died at Ostagar during the first battle of the Fifth Blight 9:30 Dragon._

_Riordan Frontenac; Senior Grey Warden of Jader; Son of Highever; Died at Denerim in the final battle of the Fifth Blight wounding the Archdemon 9:31 Dragon._

_Wynne Jameson; Senior Enchanter of the Circle of Magi; Companion to the Grey Wardens during the Fifth Blight; Died peacefully 9:34 Dragon._

For each Warden the symbol of a griffon and motto of the order was also inscribed: _In war, victory. In peace, vigilance. In death, sacrifice,_and on all the covering stones was inscribed _**Hero of Thedas**_. Each cairn was set facing east so that it would catch the rising sun. Aedan had thought it appropriate and Leliana had agreed as each had fought to ensure that there would be another sunrise free of the Archdemon and the darkspawn.

Fergus recognized the faraway look on his brother's face and knew that Aedan was thinking not only of Alistair, but also of the three other people represented by the cairns. Of the four he had only met Wynne, but each of them had left their mark on Ferelden, Thedas and most importantly on those who knew and loved them. Aedan had taken him to the spot he had picked out for the cairns and had shared stories of the three Wardens and had spoke of Alistair's wish to return to Highever and place a marker for Duncan who he had viewed as a father. Fergus understood honouring the wishes of a deceased comrade and thought it a fitting memorial. He was not the only one who thought so either, as the mason who engraved and set the covering stones for Aedan had shared the tale one night in the tavern. And ever since that evening the men and women of Highever had respectfully watched over the cairns, planting flowers around them and seeing to their upkeep. As Highever's teryn it made Fergus proud not only of the kind and generous nature of his people but of the important role Highever's sons played in ending the Blight. It if thought on it, it was surprising how much of Ferelden's history was tied to this terynir.

"Is there any truth to the rumours of your adventures in Orlais?" Fergus asked. There were wild rumours of renegade nobles, intricate assassination plots and Aedan and Leliana caught in the middle of it all, fighting for their lives.

Aedan thought over the failed assassination of the Empress and the plot to frame him for Celene's murder, the chaos of trying to prove his innocence and of running into Morrigan again. He suppressed a smile at thoughts of the time he and Leliana spent as honoured guests of the Empress. "One evening Fergus I shall let you get me drunk and I will tell you all about it. But for now I will simply say that should you ever have the opportunity to be a guest at the Imperial Palace in Val Royeaux I would encourage you to take it."

"Or I can just ask Leliana instead," Fergus said knowing the bard would probably tell him and she would make a better tale of it as well. "Speaking of my favourite bard, things between you two seem to be much improved from when you left." Fergus had noticed the distance between the pair then and at the time had hoped the time away would do them both good.

Aedan smiled before he answered. "When we left I thought I was going to lose her and now we are closer than we've ever been. I want to marry her Fergus. Do I have your permission?"

"You don't need my permission brother, though for what it's worth you have it," Fergus answered as he stood and gestured for Aedan to do the same before gathering him up in a brotherly hug. "I have never doubted how much you both care for each other. I know that Mother and Father would have liked her and approved of your choice. Leliana makes you happy and that was all our parents ever wished for us."

As he smacked Aedan's back Fergus prayed that the woman whose permission his brother did need would not be spiteful – _Please Anora, whatever your feelings for Aedan do not begrudge them this._

_

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_A/N: These past two chapters were not what I had originally intended to write. I wanted Aedan and Leliana in a dark place, doubting each other and questioning whether they really did have a future together before I brought them together again, stronger and united. I went off merrily fleshing out my plot lines and writing chapters. I wrote maybe five chapters and had the makings for at least that much remaining before I asked myself the tough question - "How does this further the story I originally intended to write - the story of a failed assassination and its aftermath." As I thought on this I decided that it didn't; that I could (hopefully) get by with the two chapters I've just completed. I leave it in your hands to determine whether I made the right choice._

_I will still continue to work on what I've written as a side-project that will either be posted as a standalone story when its done (I'm having enough trouble trying to regularly update two ongoing stories without risking my sanity on a third) or I'll recycle elements of it either in this story or in the sequel to 'Betrayal' that I'm working on._

_Also, I hunted for some reference indicating the last names for Duncan, Riordan and Wynne without success. If anyone can point to something 'official' that provides this information it would be much appreciated and I will make the necessary corrections.  
_

_As always thank you for reading, and any comments, critiques or concerns are welcome._


	15. Chapter 15

_A/N: Just wanted to take a moment to thank Liso66 for beta'ing this chapter. She really tightened it up and her help is greatly appreciated. This chapter seemed appropriate for Valentine's Day since there is a wedding and some spice. So without further ado here it is._

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Chapter Fifteen

Summerday - 1 Bloomingtide, 9:35 Dragon

Highever Castle

Aedan woke up before dawn as was his custom; to an empty bed which was not - at least not usually. After their return to Highever, he and Leliana had stayed at the castle for a few days before leaving for the Vigil. They had to ensure that their wedding gifts, along with everything else they had picked up on their journey had safely arrived from Val Royeaux. Aedan had also given letters of introduction for several artisans he had managed to entice to work at the Vigil and was eager to see their work, knowing that they would be well taken care off.

As Warden Commander and Arl, he had needed to get back and ensure that there were no issues waiting for him (Fergus had kept an eye on Gwaren for him), even though he trusted those he had left in charge: Varel, Nathaniel and Adalie. Adalie was raised in a minor Orlesian noble family and her father had grand plans to raise their status involving his daughter. But rather than be pressed into a marriage with a man old enough to be her father, she had instead joined the Order. Twelve years later, after the darkspawn attacks, she journeyed to the Vigil because she felt the need was greater there than back in Orlais. While Adalie was no novice with a sword, her true gift was in scholarly pursuits and her organized mind. She still took a semi-regular patrol, but her primary duties were in overseeing and managing the army of architects, craftsmen, and labourers rebuilding the stronghold and dealing with the various merchants and guilds who ensured they were all well supplied.

As he had expected, everything had run smoothly in his absence. After chaotic days of meetings and reports, he and Leliana had returned to Highever.

Highever was awash with visitors, as both the castle and the town's inns were flooded with guests who had come out for the wedding. A small contingent of Wardens including Oghren and Nathaniel had even made the journey, arriving a few days ago with Zevran at their side. The Wardens had come for the party. While the elf had come to support those he considered his family, although, he would never admit to it.

For the past two weeks after returning from the Vigil, he and Leliana had slept in separate rooms. While no one who knew the pair doubted their commitment to one another, they decided on separate rooms due to Aedan's desire to preserve Leliana's reputation against gossip owing to the number of guests at the castle for the wedding. He had not yet proposed to his bard, and had sworn Fergus to secrecy over his plans, as he did not want to draw any attention away from today's wedding. Even had their betrothal been announced, there would still be some who would gossip at the sin and decadence of a teryn sharing his bed while unmarried.

Since their first visit Leliana had always been provided with her own room in the family wing, and while she made some use of the dressers and chests, she had rarely slept in the bed. After the Blight and once Aedan's injuries had healed sufficiently, his pretty bard would wait until she had thought Fergus asleep and the halls empty before slipping into Aedan's room. Since they were both early risers, there were no issues with slipping back out in the morning before everyone in the castle woke. He had told Leliana that such measures were foolish, that Fergus would understand that they were not two youths stealing kisses in the larder and were already committed to one another. Yet she had insisted upon the illusion, knowing the pain their homecoming had caused both Cousland brothers and of Fergus' losses that were still so raw. Leliana had felt it would be disrespectful to parade their relationship in front of him while he grieved his lost wife and son.

Even during the Blight he and Leliana had made every effort to be discrete once their relationship started. Aedan had probably been more outgoing and engaging with their other companions, in part to overcome any potential hostility from the pairing up of two of their group. He knew that in any small mixed group, a splintering into couples could negatively impact morale if jealousy and resentment were allowed to take hold. He and Leliana had both worked hard to avoid that – never unduly favouring the other with their time and attention or rubbing their happiness in the other's faces.

They had a passionate and physical relationship and would normally wander off to find some privacy once their chores were done. But on those nights when the hunger overtook them as they lay in their shared tent: Leliana was trained in stealth; a snoring mabari can cover a multitude of sounds; and a drop of healing potion worked well on a bit tongue. If any of their companions had ever heard them they never did say, and Zevran for one would surely have had a comment waiting.

Of course, in his family home with its thick walls, they had thought none of those efforts necessary and that the lock on his door would suffice. He had not planned on Fergus' enthusiasm. There had been some issue, he now couldn't even remember, which Fergus had been anxious to discuss. Feeling it urgent, Fergus had come to his room in the middle of the night and had used the teryn's keys to open his door without knocking. Thankfully, he and Leliana were not otherwise engaged. The embarrassment on Fergus' face at finding both he and Leliana wrapped in sheets with blades drawn had been worth it. From that night on, there had been no point in maintaining the charade. The following day, they had moved most of Leliana's things into his room with Fergus' blessing.

Both here in Highever and at the Vigil (where she also maintained her own room), it was common knowledge that he and Leliana shared a bed. It was rarely spoken about, especially with outsiders. He had been told that their love and devotion was such, that even a blind man could see their bond. While they were not married, no one doubted their commitment to one another, so there was no scandal involved. Though now, with so many guests in the castle and with the Mackay family also residing in the family wing, was not the time to risk loose tongues and idle gossip.

Aedan put on his casual clothes and exited his room to meet up with his bard for the walk up to the battlements. He had only just stopped, when the door to her room opened and Elric bounded out.

"Good morning my traitorous friend," Aedan said with a laugh as he bent down to rub behind his hound's ears, for which he received a sloppy lick. His mabari had chosen to sleep in Leliana's room and in truth he couldn't blame Elric; given a choice, he would too. He straightened and kissed his love, "Good morning my beautiful bard."

"Good morning to you, my gentle Warden."

They walked up to the battlements and were surprised to find that they would have company this morning as they watched the sunrise.

"Good morning my Lady, Fergus," Aedan said.

"Please Aedan I will be your sister later today, I think we can dispense with the formalities," Diana answered. "We are sorry to intrude but Leliana told me of your little ritual and what with all the preparations and demands on us both, we've had very little time to ourselves. If you'd prefer, we can leave?"

"Don't be silly," Leliana answered. "The gift of a new day and a beautiful sunrise is for everyone to enjoy. Besides, this is your home."

Aedan wrapped his arms around his bard as she settled in with her back against his chest and watched the sunrise. He didn't look to see if his brother and his soon-to-be wife mirrored their pose, though he hoped so.

...

Aedan stood with his brother in one of the rooms just off the town chantry's main hall waiting for the knock on the door, telling them it was time for the ceremony.

"I have something for you Aedan," Fergus said as he passed over a small wooden box bearing the laurel wreath of their family crest on the lid.

Aedan took the box and opened it. He recognized _Reflection_, the amulet given to him by his father's spirit as he quested for Andraste's Ashes. In turn, he had given it to Fergus in his note when he had expected to die killing the archdemon. The brothers had never spoken of the amulet and Aedan had hoped that it had given his brother some comfort as Fergus dealt with his losses. He also recognized that now that Fergus had come to terms with his grief and was moving on with his life; it was no longer needed. It was time for Fergus to return it; _Reflection's_ purpose had been served.

"I shall always love Oriana and Oren." Fergus felt the need to explain even though he knew his brother would understand. "They will always have a special place with me here," he motioned to his heart, "and I will never forget them. Oriana would not have wanted me to live in the past...she would have wanted me to be happy." Tears started to flow from Fergus' eyes as Aedan gathered his elder brother up in a mighty embrace.

A few minutes later there was a knock on the door and the brothers exited into the main hall. About a half hour later Highever had a new teryna.

...

Aedan was dancing with the newest and quite possibly happiest member of his family. Fergus was dancing with his mother-in-law while Leliana was dancing with Bann William, Fergus' other in-law. Diana was a beautiful bride and her smile was only matched by the one on her new husband.

"I know that I've already said it, but once again, you make a lovely bride Diana. I am proud that someone as intelligent and beautiful as you would lower yourself to marry my brother," Aedan said with a smile.

"Well with Anora on the throne, I couldn't very well marry her and become the queen I was meant to be. So I set my sights a little lower and settled for becoming a teryna. Since there are only two terynirs in Ferelden, and Gwaren's teryn pales in comparison to Highever's, my choice was clear." Diana replied with mock gravity.

"Welcome to the family sister," Aedan said as the two broke into laughter.

"I do love him Aedan," Diana said in all seriousness.

"I know, as he does you."

"I know that I can never replace what he's lost, but every day I will prove myself worthy of his love."

Aedan didn't know what to say, and so he bent down and kissed Diana's forehead as he gave her hand a gentle squeeze. They continued their dance, and Aedan couldn't help his gaze being drawn to his bard. Leliana wore a blue silk dress; the colour was an almost exact match to the blue of his family crest. The dress had been crafted by Empress Celene's personal dressmaker and had been made especially for Leliana for a ball Celene had held in their honour. There was rich embroidery on the bodice and hems. She accessorized with a matching silver necklace and bracelet; wearing her long hair up in an elegant twist, exposing her delicate kissable neck.

"Leliana is a vision of beauty tonight," Diana said softly after noticing where his eyes had wandered. She caught Aedan's smile. "She loves you very much and it is clear that you feel the same way about her. I can only hope Fergus and I will be as happy as you two are." She knew from both Fergus and Leliana, who had become a sister to her, the story of Aedan and Leliana's developing love as they fought against the darkspawn, and their later travails under the weight of new burdens only to return to Ferelden stronger. Although, she was not a bard, the new teryna recognized a love that deserved ballads devoted to it.

The evening passed with much food, ale, song and dancing until the mob decided it was time to see the freshly married couple off to their new bedchamber. After seeing the newlyweds off; the party seemed to lose its wind, as many departed for their beds, either in the castle or in one of the inns in town. Although there were celebrations in the city as well, perhaps some revellers merely sought a change in locale. Aedan was never one to drink, not liking either the loss of control or the inevitable hangover, and now as host, he remained sober to ensure that their guests enjoyed themselves and made it safely to their beds.

After speaking to Ser Richard, Aedan returned to the main hall; once he was reassured the guards and knights on duty had not overindulged and were busy patrolling both the town and the castle. Only the hardiest of revellers were still going and it was soon time to call it a night. He scanned the room and it was impossible not to pick out his bard - she was laughing and dancing with Zevran. He thought himself an agile and graceful man, and yet he looked like a clumsy oaf next to the elf, especially in this. It was hypnotizing to watch as they both moved with the skill and grace of dancers with a lifetime of study and he almost failed to notice when the music ended. He looked towards the musicians and indicted for one final song; he strode out to interrupt his lover and his friend.

"Excuse me, but may I have the last dance," Aedan asked and then quickly had to decide whether to choke the Antivan or laugh at his antics. Zevran smoothly took his offered hand while he wrapped his other one around Aedan's waist. He decided on the later, and the three friends shared a laugh.

"You can't blame me for the confusion my dear Warden," Zevran said smoothly and without embarrassment. "Over the years I have made many generous offers to warm your bed. I thought that perhaps now, after mornings of waking alone, you might have finally accepted." He turned to face Leliana and gave her a flourishing bow. "I will withdraw my dear Lady. I recognize when I am defeated, that is unless you wish me to join you both?" He raised his eyebrows to form a leer that only he could pull off. "No? Then I must truly leave to seek out another who may be less immune to my charms." None of the three thought the elf would find the search taxing or fruitless.

The final dance was announced and the musicians waited as more couples moved onto the dance floor. In the relative silence, Aedan leaned down and whispered in Leliana's ear, "I have never seen you look lovelier than you do tonight, my beautiful bard. You are one of the fairest women in all of Thedas."

"Only one of?"

"A pretty and wise bard once told me that no woman ever outshined a bride on her wedding day. And since the bride is now my sister, you must 'officially' come in a close second, although unofficially there was no contest in my eyes regarding who is the fairest," he smiled and then kissed his bard as the music started.

They danced, as Aedan relished the feel of his love in arms. They shared a laugh as they turned and saw, as expected, that Zevran hadn't taken long to find a willing dance partner. The suave and nimble elf was dancing with Suzette Wharton, a freeholder who had been widowed during the Blight and was quite comely for her age.

"I wonder if Fergus is enjoying his present," Leliana said with a laugh and then continued as she saw the quizzical look upon her partner's face. They had given their gifts to the bride and groom and there was nothing that seemed appropriate for their wedding night. "I brought back some of Madame Victoria's lingerie from Val Royeaux for Diana. When I and my fellow bridesmaids dressed her, we made sure Diana was wearing it."

Aedan let out a great laugh before quietly speaking for Leliana's ears alone. "Speaking from experience, I can honestly state that he is and there certainly won't be any worries over the consummation of their marriage."

"You are incorrigible; that is your brother and his new wife you are speaking about." The bard smiled, neither the bride nor her maids had voiced any doubt as to the effect the fine silk and lace underclothes would have on the groom when she presented it to Diana. In fact, Leliana was counting on a similar reaction; she too, was wearing one of Victoria's creations. She wore a silk outfit that Aedan had never seen her wear before, in anticipation of spending the night with her Warden. She tilted her head and whispered seductively in her lover's ear, "_I want you."_

"_No more than I want you."_

The music stopped and Aedan had to stop himself from picking up their guests and tossing them outside, in his eagerness to take his bard to bed. When his brother's Seneschal and Ser Richard kindly offered to ensure the guests were attended to, Aedan said his goodnights and politely offered to escort Leliana to her room.

They reached the door to the bard's room and opened it, intending to gather some of Leliana's things and leave for his, or rather their accustomed bedroom. Instead they saw the candles had been lit and the bed had already been turned down. Without saying a word, they mutually decided that there was no reason to leave.

Aedan shut and locked the door. He gathered Leliana up in his arms as his lips sought out hers. They kissed passionately; as their tongues met they began their own dance. They kissed for a time before he turned his bard around so that her back was to him and he began to unlace her dress. He let out a curse that all dressmakers should be killed, eliciting a laugh from his bard.

"When a woman gives herself to her lover it is a precious gift. And like all gifts, it deserves to be wrapped up in beautiful coverings, commensurate with the value of what is being given. Plus it builds anticipation and it never hurts to tease ones lover," Leliana finished wickedly.

"I've already been anticipating this for weeks - where's a knife?" he said jokingly as he finished with the laces. Leliana shimmied and her dress fell to the floor; he picked it up and walked over to place it upon the room's valet stand. He turned back and drank in the vision of his bard, committing it memory. She was wearing a black silk corset with fine red embroidery that seemed to push up and emphasize her bosom. The corset also served as a garter belt for her stockings. His eye followed the finery downwards to the matching black panties, held on the sides with simple red ribbon bows. She was intoxicating, and as beautiful as Leliana had looked in her dress, it paled in comparison to how she looked now. The cut of the silk garments emphasized the femininity of her curves, while the colour stood out sharply against her porcelain skin. Aedan could feel a burning in his blood that had nothing to do with darkspawn, as he gazed upon her. And when Leliana moved towards him with her swaying hips; the burning quickly grew into an inferno that threatened to engulf him.

Leliana wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him, but rather than cool the flames of his ardour, it only stoked them higher. He scooped his bard up in his arms and started to carry her towards the bed, but stopped and set his lover down just short of his goal when he remembered the corset. Leliana's teeth tugged on his lower lip as he broke their kiss, so he could undo still more laces.

He turned her again to get at the laces on her back, but his bard had other ideas and was not yet ready to move on. She leaned back into him and raised one hand to pull his head downwards while the other reached back to grasp his hard manhood through his trousers. Corset laces forgotten, he again kissed his bard as he furiously unbuttoned his shirt before shucking it off and then began undoing the laces on his pants, which soon followed his shirt to the stone.

With one hand he held his lover's head in place as he proceeded to kiss and lick the tender spots on the back of her neck, shoulders, and around her ear. His left hand snaked down to Leliana's hip and began to undo the ribbon that held together that side of her panties. With that done, he moved his hand down to the core of her womanhood and began to rub her tender bud and explore her folds. He continued his stroking as Leliana's breathing became deeper, and he was rewarded as she began to moan softly before closing one of her hands over his, between her legs. Her other hand reached out to clutch onto the nearby bedpost as he increased his tempo. When he felt his bard sag back into him with her release he moved his free hand around her waist to support her, although he did not relax the pace of his ministrations. Aedan lowered his head towards his bard's ear intending to whisper sweet words, but she turned her head and instead they kissed hungrily; the sound of wet kisses joining the chorus of moans.

He felt Leliana move to undo the remaining bow on her panties and then she reached back to free his manhood from the confines of his smallclothes. She tried to turn but he held her tightly with the arm around her waist. He widened his stance; bending his knees, adjusting his body to hers. He was near her entrance and his bard reached down to slip him inside of her. They both moaned as he used the arm around Leliana's waist to pull her back while he pushed forward, burying his shaft fully in one powerful thrust. The hunger consumed him and all else was forgotten as Aedan began to thrust hard into his bard. His left hand continued to caress her sensitive nub. He kissed and licked over her pale skin that neared his mouth, as he gave into the pleasurable sensations that threatened to overwhelm him.

Aedan struggled to control his breathing. His moans turned guttural and were echoed by his lover. With both hands, his bard held onto the bedpost; gaining her own leverage to meet his thrust. Time had little meaning for the two lovers, but far too quickly to satisfy his hunger, he let out a muffled cry against Leliana's neck as he released his seed inside her. He continued his thrusting as he felt his bard clench around him, draining him, and it was not long before Leliana was crying out alongside him as she too reached her climax.

He moved his left hand to the bedpost to support his suddenly weak legs as he took several slow, deep breaths to steady himself. Easing his still rigid member from her warm sheath, his bard slowly turned to face him.

"Qui a été incroyable," Leliana said breathlessly as she moved in to kiss her Warden.

"It was incredible for me too, although I think we can top it." Aedan replied as he moved his hands to the laces on his love's corset and began undoing them and then released her garters. He tossed the corset onto the floor next to his clothes and kicked his smallclothes off his ankle.

Once free of her final piece of lingerie, Leliana pressed herself against her Warden, feeling sparks as their naked skin touched. The bard liked the look of the corset and how it emphasized her form, to say nothing of its effects upon her man, but she was relieved that her still heaving chest was no longer constrained in the tight garment. Her skin burned as Aedan's hands reached down to caress and finally cup her bottom. He lifted her to him, suckling on her newly freed breasts before slowly joining their bodies once again. She bit softly at her Warden's neck as he entered her again. She wrapped her long legs around his hips, locking her ankles, even though she knew Aedan would never let her fall. She worked with her Warden to lift and lower her body to meet his thrusts.

Leliana savoured this position, making her 'taller' than her Warden and able to look down into his eyes, which she had always felt was one of his best features. Certainly the passion and intensity when her Warden took her from behind, as he had just done, was arousing and definitely had its place. However, she much preferred being able to see his handsome face; to lose herself in those expressive eyes that she now gazed into. On the surface of those blue orbs she saw Aedan's hunger, which was hardly surprising considering their present actions. As she gazed deeper, she saw his strength of mind, body and spirit. And she saw the love and desire that she knew with absolute certainty, burned only for her. Just as she was sure her love and desire for only her Warden was reflected in her eyes. Where once they both had doubts; there was now only the truth of their feelings. That knowledge had brought them even closer and had heightened their lovemaking as they reached new peaks each time. She traced her lover's scars with her fingertips and felt the tremor of his muscles under her touch. Even with his strength and stamina they could not continue in this position forever.

"Take me to the bed Aedan, we have all night."


	16. Chapter 16

_A/N: Huge thanks to my beta, Liso66. Her help continues to be instrumental in the battle against my archenemy - the comma._

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_Chapter Sixteen

29 Bloomingtide, 9:35 Dragon

Royal Palace, Denerim

"Your Majesty, might I have a moment of your time? I have a private matter I wish to discuss with you," asked the Warden Commander, arl, and teryn. Aedan had come to the palace for a meeting with the Queen, various affected nobles, and representatives of the different guilds affected by the now approved plan for Grey Wardens to act as trade intermediaries. With that done, he wanted to gain his queen's approval to wed his bard Leliana.

"Of course Your Grace," Queen Anora replied with the stiff formality that was her custom.

Aedan nodded to his brother who was making a comically slow exit. No doubt he was lingering to lend his support should Anora rebuff him. Fergus was the last to leave and closed the door behind him. Anora gave him a look that implied she had better things to do than speak to him.

"I have come to ask for your approval of a marriage between myself and Lady Leliana."

Anora, normally so disciplined at maintaining her calm and measured countenance, flared her eyes in anger at this unwelcome request.

"You put me in a most difficult position Lord Cousland," the Queen responded coolly.

"How so your Majesty?"

"Surely, you understand that any nuptials for yourself have bearing upon the entire country. You are no longer the second son of a teryn, already with an heir in place. You are a teryn in your own right, and of a region that is near to my heart. You are also an Arl and our Warden Commander."

"While I will be a Grey Warden until the day I die, I have never intended to live out the remainder of my days as Warden Commander. I will always be there when needed, but for a time at least I would like to lay down my swords and forget some of the horrors I've seen and the blood on my hands."

"Nevertheless," Anora continued unabated, "any wife of yours would still be a teryna and hold a position of significant power in Ferelden. As you yourself have pointed out to me, Grey Wardens typically do not die in their sleep of old age. By your own words, your wife will likely outlive you and would then rule alone in one of the highest positions in the land.

"Is Leliana noble born?" Anora asked smugly.

"No, your Majesty," Aedan said. There was no point in lying. Anora was always well informed and would have already investigated a rival. Besides, he was proud of the woman Leliana is today. While she might not have been noble born, she had overcome so much to become the fine woman he loved. He decided to share some of Leliana's history with Anora, hoping to show the bond between them. "She is the bastard daughter of an orphaned Ferelden woman who was servant to an Orlesian Lady that resided in Denerim during the occupation. Leliana's mother was taken in by Lady Cecile as a child and by all accounts was treated well by her. After King Maric overthrew the Orlesians, she left for Orlais with Lady Cecile. Cecile being the only family a woman barely more than a child at the time had ever known. There are no records of her birth so we do not know who Leliana's father is. Leliana's mother passed when she was little more than a babe. Lady Cecile, then an elderly woman, raised Leliana as her own, ensuring that she was educated and trained to sing and dance. Tragically Lady Cecile passed too soon, and barely a youth Leliana was put out into the streets where she was forced to earn her keep as a minstrel."

"She earned her keep as a minstrel or as a spy, thief and assassin? Let us call her a bard to be charitable." The Queen said cooly.

"If her Majesty already knows the answer to her questions then I must wonder why she asks them."

"I ask my questions to ensure that _**you**_ know the answers Teryn Cousland."

"When Leliana left Orlais for Ferelden, the birth nation of her mother and a land she was raised to love, she made her way to Lothering. There she found the Chantry and devoted herself to the Maker, serving as a lay sister for two years.

"It was in Lothering where Leliana saw the first signs of the coming Blight, and joined Ferelden's remaining Grey Wardens in their quest against the darkspawn. Heroically she fought, asking nothing for herself save friendship and the chance to serve Ferelden.

"It was during this time that I fell in love with her and her with me.

"After the final battle she nursed me back to health. Thinking of the life I could offer her, and wishing better for her, I pushed her away; although I never stopped loving her. Once again Leliana entered service to the Chantry, as she worked alongside Brother Genetivi and others to reclaim and study the Temple of Andraste. It was there I sought her out and we again pledged ourselves to one another, although our duties kept us apart. Later, we were reunited and every day since then has only confirmed what I already knew – that I wished to make her my wife.

"All I ask now is your approval for something that already exists in both our hearts."

Anora paused to collect her thoughts. Aedan's words were heartfelt - if only they were of her; if only he loved her like that. People thought her cold, but that was not true. She did have a heart and Aedan had challenged her to show it more often. She had met his challenge, and later offered her heart to him, and yet he had refused it. _W__hy should he be granted his heart's desire? _ Furthermore, as Queen she had a duty to her nation to ensure that it was governed justly. Her inquiries seemed to suggest that Leliana possessed some modicum of the necessary skills and may have been an appropriate match for some minor bann. However, they were speaking of a terynir and of a man who represented Ferelden across Thedas, nearly as much as its Queen.

"While I have no doubt as to _your_ feelings Lord Cousland, in the end we are speaking of what is best for a terynir and all those who dwell within it. As you know, it requires a disciplined mind and years of training to properly administer lands and navigate the nobility. This is something that comes with noble birth, which Leliana lacks. Also, any wife of yours will by the very nature of your roles as a noble and as _Hero of Ferelden_ be a representative of our land throughout Thedas. To have our Hero married to someone with such a questionable past does you and Ferelden a disservice. I am sorry, but you do not have my approval, Lord Cousland.

Aedan wanted to rage at Anora, to strike her down for her callousness, even though in the end, it would accomplish nothing.

"If I may be so bold your Majesty, your father was born a farmer's son. What qualifications other than being a friend to and fighting alongside King Maric against the Orlesians, did he have to be granted Gwaren?" He turned to leave, but stopped after one step and faced his Queen. He let the honest compassion he felt into his voice before continuing.

"Your Majesty...Anora, if at any time I have ever misled you into believing there could be more between us than friendship; then I am truly sorry, as that was never my intent. I have only desired to be a friend to my Queen, and provide her with honest counsel when called upon. My heart has belonged to Leliana since long before we rescued you from Arl Howe's estate. I am a man of my word and I honour my oaths. While Leliana holds my heart, I will not marry another as that would not be fair to either my bride, or to my love. And I will love Leliana long after I have taken my final breath.

"I have never lied to you Anora. Unless the Maker grants me a miracle, I will never sire a child of my own and in all likelihood; I will die long before my time. You are an intelligent and beautiful woman who deserves so much more than I can provide. You deserve a good man who loves only you, and can provide you and Ferelden with many strong sons and daughters. I beg you to reconsider my request. While Leliana may not be noble born, she carries herself with dignity and grace and is experienced in the tools of statecraft. She is also a hero who helped save our land from the Blight, and deserves our respect."

The two stood and stared at each other in a contest of wills. Although he was furious and prepared to stand here all night if necessary, Aedan blinked first, deciding there was no point to it. Anora had made her thoughts known as had he. He would give her time to ponder his words and hopefully reconsider while he searched for another solution. He knew from the Orlesian Commander, that a representative traced back to Anora had contacted her to confirm that Wardens, or more specifically he, were unlikely to ever sire a child. He could only hope she believed the Orlesian Commander and as a consequence everything else Aedan had said to her. He strode back to the meeting table and left the sealed vellum containing his written marriage request upon it. Anora waited until she was alone before breaking the seal, reading the vellum, and finally tossing it into the roaring fireplace. She stood silently and watched it burn.

Fergus waited down the hall from the room where Aedan was speaking with the Queen. He heard the heavy footsteps moments before he saw his brother's face. One look was all he needed to know how their conversation went. He wanted to run back and scream at Anora. Aedan had done so much for Ferelden. Was he not entitled to this one thing? Was she that spiteful and heartless; unable to see what was clear to everyone else? Aedan walked right by him without pausing, and Fergus realized that his brother needed him more than his need to rage at the Queen. He jogged to catch up to his younger brother, and put a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"I need to leave Denerim now Fergus, or else I fear I might raze this damned place and let the rats choke on its foul remains."

...

The Cousland brothers and their guard rode at a quick pace for the Vigil, arriving well after dinner on their second day out from Denerim. Fergus had voiced a desire to camp for the evening, but after Aedan explained how near they were to their destination and his intention to continue on regardless, the men carried on. They were tired, but a hearty meal from the Vigil's kitchens and sleep on a proper bed were far too alluring. Fergus too, found the thought of a warm bed and a hot meal compelling, but even before they left Denerim, he had tried to slow them down so they could talk and plan. Ferelden's monarch was powerful, but that power was not absolute; it derived from the nobility's acceptance and approval of their sovereign. If they rallied others and proved Anora acted as a jealous woman scorned and not as a Queen, they could force her hand. It would not be without difficulty, some nobles could not look past Leliana's Orlesian accent or would try to profit at Aedan's expense. However, many others knew and liked Leliana and were likely to offer their support. Fergus recognized that if they were to rally support, Denerim was the best place for them to be. In the end he relented; recognizing the need for sober second thought, and most importantly, Aedan's desire to be with his woman right now.

After being challenged at the outer gates, they rode on and stopped at the stables. They were half way through removing and storing their horse's tack, when the rousted stable hands arrived and took over. There were the usual mutterings and talk from the men as the Cousland brothers walked in silence towards the Vigil proper.

As he neared the main doors, Fergus saw familiar faces waiting for them: Diana, Leliana and Elric. He could not help the smile at seeing his wife, even though it was not the time for it. He stopped and kissed Diana in greeting.

"Where is Aedan, Fergus?" Leliana interrupted.

"He was right beside me," replied Fergus as he turned to look for his brother.

"Elric can you find our Warden?" the bard asked and received a bark of agreement.

"Wait Leliana, please take this," the eldest Cousland said as he removed and passed over his cloak to the woman who was already his sister and a member of his family, whatever the Queen thought.

The recently married couple watched the red-headed bard and the mabari leave. Once Leliana was safely out of hearing range, Diana spoke, "Dare I ask what Anora said to Aedan?" the teryna said in an educated guess. Once the couple had left Highever after their wedding, and after swearing her secrecy, Fergus had told her about Aedan's plans to wed Leliana. Diana took a close look at her husband and read his silence, "Dear Maker why not?"

"I don't know my love. I don't know." Fergus said as he pulled his wife into a warm embrace.

...

Leliana followed Elric as he walked the grounds occasionally stopping to sniff, but continuing unswervingly in one direction. At seeing Elric's path, the bard already suspected she knew were Aedan was. There was an orchard of apple trees and just beyond that a sad, upturned tree that had been petrified in the darkspawn attacks. Many times Aedan would sit with his back against that tree, Leliana sitting between his legs, her back resting against his strong, broad chest, and Elric napping nearby. They would sit and talk or else listen to the sounds of the Vigil, the wildlife or the seemingly ever present noise of craftsmen, until eventually someone came looking for Aedan.

As she approached, Leliana put her hand down for Elric to stop and listened – she could hear sobbing. Slowly she walked forwards, and saw her love leaning against the sad tree with his head in his hands.

It never failed to pluck at her heart to see her Warden cry. He was the strongest man she had ever met; a man who seemed capable of carrying the weight of the world upon his back. Yet beneath that great strength, beat a gentle and compassionate heart that was easily its equal, and that heart was hurting.

"Aedan," the bard called hesitantly, as if she had not seen him.

"I'm here."

Leliana slowly made her way to her lover, giving him time to compose himself. "You had me worried when you disappeared on Fergus," she said as she knelt down beside him.

"I'm sorry my beautiful bard," Aedan said as he took Leliana's hands in his. "I needed a moment to myself ...to think."

"Is there something I can help with?" She already knew something was wrong and tried a different tack to get him to open up.

"Let us leave this place," he said pleadingly, surprising Leliana. "We can wander Thedas as a minstrel and her protector, earning our keep with your beautiful voice or we can even live out our days in Orlais if that is what would make you happy. Whatever you want to do, tell me and we'll leave tonight."

Leliana listened to her Warden and his words disturbed her. Without even realizing it, she pulled her hands free. Certainly the idea of living in Orlais was tempting. Celine had offered Aedan land and titles for his role in preventing her assassination and routing out the traitors, but they had already decided against it – _together_. She was a Ferelden woman and Aedan's heart and blood were of Highever. Also, her Warden was never one to shirk his oaths and duties. Were they to do as he bid, she knew it would only be days before her Warden was at war with himself; ashamed at abandoning those he loved and his responsibilities and yet, willing to soldier on to please her. That commitment, that indomitable will to move heaven and earth to keep his word, was one of the few constants in her life and one of the many things she loved and admired about Aedan – and he was willing to break it for her.

"Tell me truthfully, what is bothering you Aedan? It scares me to hear you speak this way."

Aedan reached out and pulled Leliana into a fierce kiss. She returned it, but pulled away, wanting an answer to her question. She looked at her Warden expectantly and saw that again tears were running down his cheeks.

"I love you so much Leliana, but I do not want to continue on like this." He paused and the bard felt her whole body tense. "I don't want to wait any longer - I asked Anora for her approval to make you my wife." Aedan didn't need to tell her the Queen's answer.

"Oh Aedan, we do not require Anora's approval for what is in our hearts," Leliana said emphatically as her own tears began to fall. "I am yours and you are mine, now and forever. We are bound, you and I, tighter and stronger than any marriage.

"And my place is at your side, in Ferelden," the bard said firmly. "I am happy here, my gentle Warden, with you and with our family."

"It's not right Leliana. It's just not right. You are a kind and decent woman; more than worthy of being a teryna."

The bard wrapped her arms around her lover's head, drawing him against her breast and lending him her strength. She believed her words, that they were already wed in everything but name. However, she could not help the longing to be recognized as his wife. Not for the titles or the power and respect that came with them, but to proudly and openly declare that she was Leliana Cousland, wife of Aedan.

She leaned down and kissed the top of Aedan's head. "It's cold and late my Warden. Come; let us return to the Vigil. No doubt a meal is already being prepared for you."

They stood and began to walk back to the Vigil. Leliana wondered if she could slip away from the Vigil and travel to Denerim without alarming Aedan. Would Queen Anora even agree to see her? No, she would not, the bard decided. She then began to mentally compose a letter to the 'dear and honourable' Queen that would leave with the next courier bound for the capital.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter Seventeen

23 Solace, 9:35 Dragon

Vigil's Keep

Leliana entertained Fergus and Diana in the sitting room of the suite she shared with Aedan, all while keeping a watchful eye on the door. The couple had arrived unexpectedly three days ago for a visit. Though the teryn and teryna tried their best to hide it, the bard already knew the purpose of their visit and the news they had come to share. She could see it plainly on their faces and in how their touch lingered that extra moment. She was truly happy for them, and yet that joy was shrouded in fear. Aedan and his patrol of Wardens were a week overdue from their patrol checking on the sealed entrances to the Deep Roads and she could not help but worry.

She and her Warden had once fought over her accompanying him on these patrols. She had not wanted to be apart from her Warden and he, if the worst should happen and an entrance lay open, had not wanted to take her down into the depths of hell. Although they both knew each other's true fears, neither had spoken them, not wishing to give voice to their fears and make them real. For Leliana, who truly never wished to ever return to the cold desolation of the Deep Roads but would for him, it felt like Aedan was walking to the final end that awaited every Warden 'lucky' enough to reach their Calling. For Aedan it was the unspoken fear of an untainted woman in the Deep Roads – _broodmother_. Leliana was not too proud to admit to sharing Aedan's unspoken fears; no woman who had ever seen that foul perversion could help but be haunted by it. She would rather be dead than suffer that fate and she knew that Aedan would never allow it to befall her. He would kill her himself rather than allow the darkspawn to corrupt her so.

In the end, Leliana's fear that her presence would cause either Aedan or one of the other Wardens to overprotect her at the risk of their own safety was too great and she had relented. She would not be the cause of anyone's death nor allow Aedan's last sight of her to be a terrified and tainted visage before he slew her. For she knew that would surely break her Warden. Likewise, she did not ask to undergo the Joining. She knew the pain and regret Aedan felt even after a successful trial and it was all the more acute when it was a woman. Her Warden felt that he was stealing something precious from each recruit, and even knowing both the vital need for and the dire cost paid by each Warden a part of Leliana could not help but agree.

So she accompanied her Warden when there was minimal risk of an unexpected sojourn into the Deep Roads and busied herself around the fortress and maintained an uneasy vigil when there was. Leliana flexed her long unused training in statecraft and diplomacy as she worked alongside Seneschal Varel as he administered the Arling. She educated herself at Mistress Woolsey's desk as together they poured over the accounts. She accompanied Warden Adalie to many of the meetings with the various guilds and merchants who serviced and supplied the Vigil. Leliana also found time to practice with her bow and blades and occasionally pass on her knowledge to those willing and able to learn. While these activities normally kept her mind occupied during the days when Aedan was away, the nights were long and cold as the fears took hold, especially now that his patrol was late. Leliana knew that she was not alone in this; that there were others at the Vigil who had grown to care and love many of the Wardens out on patrol and no doubt shared her worries. Also, the bond between Wardens was extraordinarily strong and meals at the Vigil had been subdued these last few days.

"Leliana," Diana said, bringing the bard's attention solely onto her. The young woman slipped Fergus' hand into hers. "We were going to wait until Aedan returns, but perhaps some good news might distract you while we wait for him."

"Warden Moira confirmed what Healer Alma told me before we left Highever - I am with child," Diana said joyously.

Leliana stifled a small chuckle that her suspicions were proven correct. She stood and moved over to embrace and kiss the cheeks of the happy couple. "I am so happy for you both."

"You will act surprised _when_ we tell Aedan won't you?" Fergus asked.

The bard noted the strong and reassuring tone of Fergus' voice that was brimming with confidence. Suddenly, she felt very foolish. Aedan had faced and defeated evils few could even comprehend and had always found some way to make it back. His patrol was only a few days late and already she feared the worst?

"Of course I will Fergus," Leliana answered. Foolish tears sprung from her eyes as Fergus pulled her into one of the fierce embraces that seemed to be a Cousland family trait. "I'm sorry. I have not been a proper host to you both."

"There is nothing to apologize for. We are family Leliana," Fergus said as he patted her back. He released the bard and she was swept up in a sisterly embrace by Diana.

The remainder of the evening passed quickly as they moved to the main hall and were joined by many others. Conversation flowed freely and good stories and laughter were shared. The bard even played her lute and sang rousing songs to banish the threatening darkness that had gripped the Vigil ever since the expected return of the patrol had passed. That night when Leliana lay down on the bed she shared with Aedan the fear did not grip her as it usually did and she truly slept.

When Leliana woke and strode up to the battlements to watch the dawn, she knew in her heart that Aedan was doing was the same.

Later, before the midday meal, Derreck a member of Aedan's patrol arrived bringing news and requesting horses, carts, craftsmen and healers to accompany him back to collect the remainder of his patrol. They had come across a sealed Deep Roads entrance the darkspawn had broken through. The Wardens, as was their duty, went down into the depths to clear out the darkspawn and remove their threat. Unfortunately, there had been another, new and unknown exit which the foul beasts had used to escape their executioners. The darkspawn had surfaced and taken their revenge upon the horses before finally falling to the Warden's blades. Derreck stated that while no one was killed, the healing mages, Peter and Lucinda, were both wounded and nowhere near their best and there were several serious injuries to tend to. The Warden and veteran of the Battle of Denerim had commandeered a horse from a farm he had passed and had ridden straight on to the Vigil to deliver his call for reinforcements.

Within the hour, a small army of men and women with Derreck and an armoured Fergus at its head left the Keep. Their task was to again seal the Deep Roads entrances and return the Wardens safely home. Leliana had wanted to go as well, but Fergus requested she stay with Diana, and after repeated assurances from Derreck that Aedan was fine, she had acquiesced. So the two women, united by their love of brothers, clasped hands for mutual support as they watched the departing men and women leave. One brother was leaving his pregnant love behind, in the expectation of returning the other to his waiting love.

Six long days later everyone arrived safely home. Leliana could not help but notice the limp Aedan tried to hide or the pink new skin on his hands and neck from freshly healed burns. He swept her up in his arms, lifting her up from the ground, and holding her tight.

"You had me worried when Derreck arrived alone," Leliana whispered in her Warden's ear.

"Not even the Maker himself could keep me from your side, my beautiful bard," Aedan whispered back.

Leliana was tempted to chastise Aedan for his blasphemy, but instead she took comfort at the meaning behind his words and the deep love that had prompted them.

It was the following day when Highever's Lord and Lady shared their news, and a hastily prepared feast was served. Leliana cried at seeing the emotion and tears on her Warden's face as he congratulated the couple. She would never begrudge Fergus and Diana their happiness; however, she could not help but feel some resentment towards the Maker and especially the Grey Wardens. She knew that Aedan would make a wonderful father and yet fate and the Wardens had conspired to deny him, despite her prayers.

25 Kingsway, 9:35 Dragon

Landsmeet Hall, Denerim

"If there is no further business before the Landsmeet then I will call this session to a close," Queen Anora said as she swept her gaze across the crowd, the acoustics of the chamber allowing even those in the rear to hear her voice clearly.

"Your Majesty," Arl Bryland of South Reach called out. With a nod the Queen indicated for the Arl to proceed.

"My Queen," Bryland said and then paused. It was clear from his face and body language that he was steeling himself to continue. "I have the utmost respect for you, my Queen, and wish you only a long and prosperous reign, yet I feel compelled to bring a sensitive matter forward in the best interests of our nation.

"While our land has overcome much since the devastation caused by the Blight and the darkspawn attacks upon Amaranthine, I am confident that I am not the only one here who feels that Ferelden still rests upon the edge of the knife. While you are still young and beautiful my Queen, I am certain that we all remember the unrest that ensued when good King Cailan passed and Ferelden was left without an heir or a clear line of succession."

Aedan listened carefully to the Arl's words, admiring the courage of the man to openly voice what many in this hall merely gossiped and whispered about. As a Warden, he continued to travel the length and breadth of Ferelden and had heard the rumours that were only increasing in number and spite. The lack of a royal marriage and heir was rapidly becoming the talk of all Ferelden, from the finest gatherings to the local taverns and none of it was positive.

A small group of nobles, including Bryland, had approached Aedan before the Landsmeet seeking his support to press the importance of marriage upon the Queen and further suggesting him as the most suitable candidate to be her husband. He had listened politely to his fellow nobles before declining their offer on both counts. He had urged the nobles not to voice their concerns openly in the Landsmeet; that if they truly felt that strongly about the matter, to approach Anora in private. A few had pressed him to reconsider, but Bryland had seen Aedan with his bard and knew his heart had been claimed. The Arl, a long-time friend of Bryce Cousland dating back to the rebellion against the Orlesians, also knew that while both of Bryce's sons loved Ferelden neither lusted for power.

Despite those nobles ignoring his advice, Arl Bryland, a noted patriot of Ferelden who had fought beside King Maric and his rebels, was quite possibly the perfect choice to voice their concerns. The Arl was no longer a young man who could dream of the throne. He was also acknowledged as an honourable, honest, and decent man. Also, Bryland had no sons to put forward. There was only his daughter Habren, who would need a miracle to gain the confidence of the Bannorn just to be put into any possible line of succession – near the end.

"I do not make any demands of my Queen and in truth I am uncomfortable raising this delicate issue before the Landsmeet," the Arl continued, looking embarrassed. "With respect your Majesty, it has been almost four years since the Blight's end without a royal wedding or issue. Gossip and malicious rumours have begun to spread like wildfire and I feel that if left unresolved it will undermine my Queen and the Landsmeet will turn into some Orlesian whore's den as we all jockey for position. For Ferelden to continue to recover and prosper that cannot be allowed."

The Landsmeet Hall had been eerily silent throughout Bryland's speech and then, as if on cue, the shouts began. Voices screamed out either championing some prospective husband or else shouting the prospect down, even the Queen's voice was drowned out. It disgusted and embarrassed Aedan how quickly this 'noble and august' gathering could resolve into an unruly mob. He scanned the crowd, noting the ringleaders and forming opinions regarding their motivations. He wished Leliana was here, bringing her insightfulness and knowledge, but alas she had traveled to Highever to visit Diana while Fergus was in Denerim with him.

When his gaze fell upon Anora, he saw that she was already looking at him. Anora was a justifiably proud woman and he could see her embarrassment and humiliation at having such a personal matter raised in this way. Aedan was unable to meet her eyes and looked down in shame and embarrassment. While he agreed with Bryland, he was ashamed that Anora was being treated in this way, and while he knew he had always been honest with Anora, he was ashamed that he could not be the man she wanted him to be.

Aedan felt rather than noticed the eyes and expectations upon him to speak. He ignored it, having already made his own views clear to the one person who mattered – Anora. He had no desire to be pulled into this spectacle. Finally, it became oppressive and even Fergus elbowed him to speak.

"Queen Anora, honoured Lords and Ladies," Gwaren's teryn began slowly and waited for silence. "Arl Bryland is a wise and honourable man who wishes only the best for Ferelden, and his words are motivated by love of Queen and country. In truth, there is much wisdom and merit to his words, however, with all due respect to a man my family has long called a friend, I do not feel that this is an appropriate forum for this discussion. Unfortunately, it has been raised and my opinion apparently desired, so I will give it.

"Ferelden's Queen is still young and able. Her Majesty has capably led us from the dark times that followed the Blight as we struggled to rebuild and establish a new age of growth and prosperity. Our Queen has nobly put her focus upon raising and rebuilding all of our lands from the ashes of the Blight. In short, Queen Anora has placed her people's needs before her own." He paused to let his words sink in.

"Does anyone here challenge the manner in which Queen Anora has ruled?" Aedan dared the hall and waited for someone to come forward; unsurprisingly no one did. "And yet we presume to instruct our Queen in this most personal of matters, as if she was unaware of _all_ her duties. Queen Anora will proceed as she has already done and act in Ferelden's best interests.

"With regards to the slanderous rumours and innuendo regarding our Queen that we have all heard, I am disgusted by them and will not repeat them here." Faces turned away from both the Teryn and the Queen and suddenly the carpets and wall hangings became fascinating. There was no doubt to anyone in the hall that Aedan spoke about the rumours Anora was barren.

"Good King Cailan loved his Queen," Aedan said loudly, pulling the attention back to him. "Yet, like all of us, he was not a man without his faults, the nature of which many here are aware." Aedan scanned the crowd and could see the nodding heads as most, if not all, had at least heard rumours of Cailan's many infidelities. He purposely avoided looking towards either Eamon or Teagan, Cailan's uncles, and resolved to seek out Teagan afterwards. "I do not wish to denigrate his memory, but to protect his Queen I feel certain that were he among us today Cailan would give me leave to continue. To be blunt, in all the years before or after Ostagar no one has come forth with a bastard from Cailan's loins. To suggest that Queen Anora alone was responsible for the lack of an heir is a travesty.

"I will not presume to instruct my Queen in matters of the heart, but do acknowledge the merit of designating an heir should the worst befall our Queen."

"Easy for you to say when Cousland's hold both terynirs and your brother's wife is with child," Bann Ceorlic called out.

Aedan looked to his brother and it was a good thing Ceorlic was not near or else the foul bastard would be lucky to only be lying on the stone with a sore jaw courtesy of Fergus' fist.

"With respect Bann Ceorlic," Aedan replied coldly. "I am merely offering an opinion, not putting myself forward. I well remember the time after King Cailan fell, and it serves no one's purposes that if in the unlikely event some tragedy befalls our Queen, Ferelden falls into chaos. Furthermore, while it is custom to look to the teryns should Ferelden lose its monarch, it is the Bannorn who truly decides who will rule."

Aedan turned to face Anora, he still could not meet her eyes and so focused on a spot just above them. "I am sorry for any embarrassment my words may have caused you my Queen." He crossed his arms across his chest and bowed to Anora. "I pray you forgive me."

Anora scanned the crowd, studying the assembled faces. Aedan's words of support had silenced the nobles and given her room to manoeuvre. "No apologies are needed Teryn Cousland; nor from you Arl Bryland," the Queen said graciously, looking at each man in turn. "I recognize the wisdom, the love, and the concern behind your words and for that I thank you both."

While Aedan's senses seemed to be hyper-vigilant, the remainder of the Landsmeet passed in a daze. Fergus later told him that the Landsmeet accepted Anora's reassurances that a husband and heir were highest on her list of priorities. The Queen had bought herself some time, but not very much.

It was the recognition of movement towards the doors that cleared Aedan's head. He moved quickly to catch Teagan and apologize for speaking ill of Cailan. There was no point in approaching Eamon who he noticed was exiting alongside Ceorlic. The honourable Bann accepted his regrets, recognizing that while Cailan and Anora's marriage was complicated, there had been love after a fashion between the two, and his nephew would have objected to Anora's embarrassing treatment.


	18. Chapter 18

_A/N: A few of you eagle eyed readers may have noticed that I did follow Ventisquear's suggestion and changed the summary and character pairings, which to be honest I should have done some time ago (chalk it up to laziness on my part)._

_If you'll bear with me I will explain my thinking._

_This story was originally plotted quite differently and at a much faster pace, with Aedan and Zevran arriving in Antiva around chapter 10. It was still going to start with the conversation with Anora, Alistair was going to die, Leliana and Aedan were going to struggle to build a live together and I would lay out suspects to the eventual assassination which would move the story to Antiva (where the closest analogy would have been a buddy-cop summer movie with lots of explosions and mayhem). Of what has already been written, some would have remained, some would have been little more than footnotes, some would have appeared as flashbacks later in the story, and some would have been omitted entirely. _

_ As I started to write though, it seemed that I wasn't generous enough in my original pacing and in my opinion the story would have felt forced and rushed. While I have and will continue to assume that you as a reader have played through Dragon Age (Origins, Awakening and II) and already have the familiarity of 50+ hours of game time, the original plotting would have relied upon this too heavily. At the risk of sounding like a pompous a-hole, I wanted you to care about Aedan and Leliana's stuggles on their own merits and what would drive Aedan to take the fight to Antiva and endanger his friend Zevran - not just because they were your favourite characters in the game._

_To all the Zevran fangirls and boys who may feel hoodwinked into ready a story that, at least so far, has very little Zevran in it please accept my apologies as that was never my intent (**this is not a reflection upon the comments of any one reader or reviewer, just voicing my own concerns**). Even as originally plotted this story was about an assassination within the context of a greater Aedan-Leliana romance, except now that romance has been given a larger role. Zevran will still appear in this story and will have a large role to play, it is just a little later in arriving than originally intended. I will understand if you decide not to keep reading, but I hope you will continue to give this story a chance._

_As always comments and criticisms are welcome._

_Thank you,_

_Lemonjay_

_PS: To avoid any misunderstandings with the timeline, the first part of this chapter takes place prior to the Landsmeet of last chapter and the second part after it._

* * *

Chapter 18

20 Kingsway, 9:35 Dragon

Royal Palace, Denerim

"Your Majesty, thank you for favouring me with your time," Arl Bryland said as he bowed before his queen.

"You are quite welcome my Lord," Anora answered warmly as she directed him to take the chair opposite her. She had received the Arl in her office, although they sat by the fireplace rather than her desk. Leonas Bryland was usually one of her strongest supporters so there was no need to impress upon him that he came petitioning a Queen.

Anora quite liked Arl Bryland. He was an intelligent, honourable, and above all else practical man who could be counted on to act first in the best interests of South Reach and secondly Ferelden. They had few disagreements, with those primarily relating to his vigorous championing of his lands and its people which had been hard hit by the Blight. In the early years following their victory over the darkspawn Bryland, along with several other southern lords, had repeatedly pressed her for increased financial support from the crown to rebuild their lands. At the time, and still to a somewhat lesser extent today, there was tremendous pressure on the treasury as it struggled to meet its obligations and finance rebuilding efforts while collecting a mere fraction of its normal taxes. Rather than simply tell Bryland that the treasury was closed, she had engaged the Arl, bringing him into her inner circle and allowing him to see, hear, and provide input into the difficult choices she faced as she rationed supplies and aid throughout the nation. From that time a genial working relationship had emerged. While she and Bryland still had their small disagreements, there was a base of trust and respect between them.

"Please forgive me my Queen, but I come before you with a personal matter of grave import that I feel must be brought to your attention."

"Please speak freely Leonas," Anora answered, deciding to ignore the customary offer of food and refreshments.

"It is a sensitive matter your Highness, one that involves you."

"You are my friend – whatever you wish to say will remain solely between us."

Anora listened as Bryland haltingly told her of the rumours making their rounds across Ferelden. She gently probed for more information. In part to confirm the measure of the man before her, and in part to determine if they matched the ones her own agents had spoken of. Bryland truthfully spoke of the lies being spread about her, while ignoring the most hateful ones – that Anora knew she was barren, even going back to her marriage to Cailan; or that she whored around the nobility in a desperate attempt to find anyone who could father a child in her withered womb. Of course no man ever stepped forwards to say that he had laid with her and failed. Her personal guards certainly knew the truth of her empty bed, but they were honour and duty bound to protect both her body and her name. Even if her guards stood at the top of Fort Drakon and shouted the truth for all to hear, few would believe them.

Bryland swore he did not know the source of the rumours and she believed him. He respectfully encouraged her to confront the lies head on by seeking out a husband who could provide both her and Ferelden with an heir. She almost felt like a little girl again, sitting on her father's knee as Loghain lectured her on duty, but unlike that little girl she knew her duty and knew it well enough that despite Bryland's noble intentions a little of the anger she felt showed on her face.

Anora wanted to ask Bryland if he'd spoken to Aedan about his duty to Ferelden and his Queen. To ask who among the power-hungry and the vain potential suitors who had come to Denerim Bryland would choose. Or whether Bryland agreed that had she spent the years finding a husband and making babies that the rumours would instead be that she placed her own happiness and well-being over Fereldens?

She was not mad at Bryland exactly. Did a sick man get mad at the healer for correctly informing him of the illness? No, he was merely a symptom of the hypocrisy that existed throughout every nation in Thedas. An old and feeble king, provided his cock still worked, would not be questioned over an heir – the nobles and even the commoners would be so sure that a line of foolish girls would form, all eager to spread their legs and beget him a child. Yet a Queen of not even thirty years should have no greater concern than finding a proper husband and producing an heir. While she may have wasted her prime childbearing years on Cailan, thirty was not so old that she was a dry and shrivelled old hag.

The Queen respected Bryland, but she would not have him come into her home and lecture her over this most personal of matters. She was Queen, she knew all her duties and would carry them out as she saw fit and she told the Arl so. She watched Bryland wilt under her response.

"Your Majesty, I raise the issue because I feel that you should be concerned by it and if left unresolved your reign will suffer as intrigues become commonplace. I understand that it is difficult for one who has ruled justly to hear that despite everything she done to rebuild our nation that many feel her greatest duty is on her back. I warn you, not as a threat but out of respect and concern, that this matter will be raised at the Landsmeet for the good of Ferelden. I am sorry my Queen."

Anora watched Bryland leave. She knew his visit and his concerns were not motivated by an attempt at gaining power or influence, but rather by a desire to protect his lands and country. Likewise, she could not deny that his concerns held merit. One merely had to look to the aftermath of Ostagar to get a taste of what would happen should she die without an heir and various nobles fought for the kingdom. In fact the fighting would be much worse as there would be no threat of the Blight to mitigate the noble's actions or to stop Orlais from interfering at best or more likely invading outright.

What rankled though was the idea of being trapped into another marriage of convenience to a man she did not love and for the sole purpose of producing an heir to secure her continued reign. The implication that despite the acknowledgement that she ruled well and fairly, her womb was all that truly mattered. It would be so much easier if Aedan shared her love.

Perhaps though there was some way to turn this to her advantage? If Bryland did raise the matter before the Landsmeet she would see the reactions of the nobles and be able to judge those who stood beside their Queen and who opposed her. Perhaps it might even flush out a few of the more outspoken nobles who were likely behind the rumours.

Anora exited her office and sent a page off to find her handmaiden. Despite being widely known as her trusted servant, Erlina had a gift for manoeuvring through Landsmeets, silently listening and overhearing things. Furthermore, Erlina had a keen mind and was a good judge of character and reactions; she too would be watching for reactions if Bryland spoke.

Minutes later Anora looked up from her papers at the knock of the door.

"How may I serve you, your Majesty?" Erlina asked.

"Close the door and come in Erlina, we have much to discuss and plan."

...

28 Kingsway, 9:35 Dragon

Denerim

He escorted his guests from the dining room to his study, leaving their wives and children behind as the men retired for a brandy, a smoke and some debate. At least that is what those left behind thought. It was important that even those closest to them remained unaware of the true nature of their gatherings. To outsiders and even their own families these gatherings were simply friends sharing a meal and conversation at a convenient time and place. There were many long-time friends who only saw each other in person during Landsmeets, as the nobility and other prominent citizens made their way to Denerim. Small, intimate dinners were commonplace during these periods, and without reason to investigate further no one would consider anything untoward regarding their gathering. His father had always said that it was always best to use people's expectations as camouflage for one's activities.

Their meal and the conversation were certainly true enough. They would discuss this past Landsmeet and make plans for the next, as they strove to improve their respective and collective fortunes. The pursuit of wealth and power was what united them, be they nobles, merchants, or guild masters. In the case of his family and one other, they had been united for over two centuries dating back to King Arland. They each strove to increase the power, influence, and wealth of their respective families and collectively they, like many of their fathers before them, had come together to make it happen. Again like so many others who come to Denerim for Landsmeets none of this was unusual. Many families were aligned in common cause either through marriage or interest, and many schemed to improve their respective lots.

Where they differed though was in loyalty. Each paid only lip-service to the Ferelden crown, regardless of who wore it, and was loyal only to the other members of their cabal and their foreign allies. That loyalty was secured by documents and knowledge each held, and that, if exposed, would completely ruin and destroy their families with perhaps only the youngest escaping the headsman.

After Cailan died they had initially supported Loghain's undeclared claim for the throne. While bearing the taciturn teryn no love, he along with Howe were cutting a great swath through the nobility, eliminating so many rivals and creating so many new avenues to power and wealth that it was foolish not to. While Loghain was thoroughly disliked by much of the Bannorn, with Bryce Cousland dead, Eamon incapacitated, and his daughter already on the throne there were also few real challengers. Furthermore, if it came down to a test of arms Loghain was a general of renown and despite leaving the King to die had the loyalty of his forces, which outnumbered those of any potential rival. Loghain had also had his moments of political astuteness and in the past had foiled more than his fair share of intrigues. At the time they also could not discount that Loghain would act against anyone who might have stood against him.

Loghain was also a man with glaring weaknesses, ripe to be exploited. Loghain had relied upon a depraved toady like Rendon Howe who could easily be bought and truly owed no allegiance to anyone other than himself. Howe had even barely tolerated his own children, treating them as nothing more than pawns in a game of chess and good only for what marriages and alliances they could bring.

Loghain had also possessed a sense of paranoia that bordered on insanity. One merely had to mention Orlais and the Teryn would foam up like a mad dog, dropping everything to root out conspirators, whether real or imagined. Howe had used Loghain's fears and some obviously forged documents to attack and destroy the Couslands with the Teryn's blessing. A man with such an obvious and predictable blindness could have served them all well as they played to his fears to show their allegiance and gain rank while also using those same fears to taint those who stood in their way. They could have built their powerbase and positioned themselves as they waited until Howe inevitably turned on Loghain, and then one of their number would have slipped in as adviser to and the power behind the throne.

Of course the winds changed, the darkspawn were a greater threat then previously believed and they blew in with their Blight. The foul creatures brought with them Bryce Cousland's whelp not so dead at Howe's hands as he had claimed, and a bastard son of Maric at the head of a great army of united races.

The memory of that Landsmeet suddenly came to the forefront. Loghain's stubborn insistence that Orlais was the true threat was stupidity personified when so much of the country had already fallen to the darkspawn. His further claims that he alone could beat back the darkspawn horde fell on deaf ears in light of the evidence to the contrary. Cousland while young was battle hardened and looked vital; he was also known to the nobility and like his father there was a presence about him that almost compelled you to listen when he spoke. While Loghain and Howe had retreated to Denerim to secure their power, Cousland and Maric's bastard had publicly tasted victory over both Loghain and the darkspawn and everyone liked a winner. Furthermore, he had assembled an army larger than any Loghain could field, one that would only have grown as more flocked to the Grey Warden banner. Yet, they as a group had hedged their bets and split their votes. In the end, Loghain, like Howe before him, died on Cousland's blade. Cousland led the forces that defeated the archdemon and ended the Blight, but Maric's bastard was killed, once again leaving Anora as a Queen in need of a husband. So their cabal's plans changed in response to the new reality. It became less positioning the current family heads into positions of power and more grooming their sons to capture the Queen's eye and here again Cousland threatened to waylay their plans.

The Cousland whelp infuriated him, he was a dangerous mixture of nobility and prowess, who if you believed in that sort of thing seemed to carry the Maker's favour since he had cheated death more times than any man had a right to. That Anora consolidated power within the Cousland family by giving Amaranthine and her family's terynir of Gwaren to her father's killer defied belief; even if by doing so she sidestepped the calls that were still whispered today that Cousland take up the kingship of Ferelden. For a time they _had_ feared Cousland would force the issue and take the throne. In light of his victory over the archdemon and his spirited defence of Amaranthine few would have opposed him then or now. He had seen and felt the collective will of this past Landsmeet as they looked to Cousland for guidance and leadership. If Cousland but declared an interest in the throne it would be his, whatever Ferelden's Queen desired. Although there had been rumours that Anora was infatuated with Cousland and would not object to the match. Here Anora displayed the weaknesses typical of her sex that drew women to strong men with swords.

To their surprise Cousland had never made a move on the throne and had even begun parading a red-headed Orlesian without title or wealth on his arm. There were even rumours that Anora refused a marriage request between the two if such a thing could be believed. Cousland was raised to be smart enough to marry for lands and title and to keep his whores as his mistresses, but now with the pressure on Anora to find a husband and much of the Bannorn looking to Cousland, would his sense of nobility and duty propel him to the throne?

He closed and locked the door behind him. The click of the lock sealing their unspoken agreement that from now until the door was unlocked none of their own names would ever be spoken. He took his seat and quickly looked at the men around him, "We have much to discuss."


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

13 Firstfall, 9:35 Dragon

Royal Palace, Denerim

Anora looked down at the papers on her desk and sighed. Each page had a name and a corresponding title or rank at the top and was divided into two columns: one listing strengths and the other weaknesses. There were fifteen pages in total, although there could have easily been many more.

While in some ways it was good that Bryland had spoken out and brought the slanderous rumours about her into the light of day it was not without cost. [Erlina had once again proven her worth that day, sifting through the nobles, always watching and listening. Between herself and her handmaiden they had confirmed seven nobles as unfriendly towards her and identified two others currently being investigated – half with marriageable sons (none of whom were under consideration now) and the rest Calenhad loyalists, despite their being no direct line descendents. Maric was one of the few in his line to have sired two children, with the last being Percival who fathered Vanedrin (father of Brandel the Defeated and grandfather of Moira the Rebel Queen) and Valeria (who married Teryn Ardal Cousland and was Aedan's great-great-grandmother)] Anora hated this feeling of weakness and public humiliation as the Bannorn had essentially put her on public notice that her continued reign hinged upon a husband and heir. In politics it was never wise to bargain from a position of weakness and now hers was widely known and all sought to exploit it.

Nearly every noble family in Ferelden with a marriageable son had remained in Denerim for the winter '_to make themselves available for their dear Queen.' _She had also received several invitations and requests to either journey to or have 'guests' visit Denerim from the various city-states of the Free Marches, Nevarra, and even Orlais (as if she would, she was still her father's daughter). Just the other day a young boy not even half her age was paraded before her like some prized bull while his mother droned on about his quality and breeding while not so subtly intimating that Anora needed someone on the cusp of manhood who would have the youthful virility to fill her barren womb. She had been disgusted and enraged by the gall of the woman, and only the look of bewilderment and embarrassment on the boy's face had prevented Anora from having her guards throw them out of her city.

In her heart there was only need for one page, but she had not even bothered to write it up. That man had fled Denerim like a thief in the night immediately after the last Landsmeet without a backward glance. While her heart might wish otherwise, her practical side and desire to remain on the throne had forced her to move on without him. She had resigned herself to the painful fact that while Aedan would defend her right to be Queen, he would never stand beside her as her loving husband and king. She had repeatedly expressed her desire for him and if that and the collective will of the Landsmeet pushing him towards the throne could not bring him to perform his duty to Queen and country then she knew that Aedan would never cave. Anora was also a proud enough woman that she would never beseech any man into her bed.

With the most desirable and suitable choice unwilling and no one else stirring her heart, Anora had to establish some criteria to judge who was most suitable. She had already determined the most important parameters for a husband in what would no doubt be her second passionless marriage. Her husband would be prince-consort only, never king, and when she died the throne would pass only to their offspring. Most importantly, her husband would leave the actual ruling of Ferelden to her. His role would be to stand beside her in public and look pretty. For if she was going to share her bed for however many nights it took to be with child, her husband had better be handsome.

There were other considerations of varying importance. Could she and her potential husband at least develop a friendship, since she did not expect love? Was he well mannered and cultured enough to represent both her and Ferelden without embarrassing either? What alliances or trade benefits did the potential prince offer? Did the potential prince possess reasonable martial skill and ability to lead Ferelden's armies in battle? The list went on and on, but all these considerations paled before the first two. The throne and all it entailed was hers and her alone and it would pass only to her children, on those points there would be no debate.

She looked up at the discrete knock on her door and called out 'Enter.'

"It is soon time your Majesty," Erlina said softly upon entering. The handmaiden studied her mistress and could not help but feel a pang of regret and sorrow. While she doubted Lord Cousland had intended to harm her Lady, and as the Queen's closest confidante Erlina knew he had only ever been honest and honourable, he had nevertheless wounded her badly. As someone who knew the Queen well and had been in her Majesty's company daily for just over a decade, she could see the scars no matter how hard her Lady tried to hide them. Those scars manifested themselves in a shortening of the Queen's patience and a sharpening of her tongue, long days and nights in her office as though she was proving her fitness to rule all over again, and most tellingly her focus was once again upon cold, calculated, impersonal numbers to name but a few changes. It pained Erlina to see her Lady hurt so for she knew the Queen had a good heart and a kind nature. In fact her Lady had demonstrated it many times over these past few years, but with the sting of rejection from both Lord Cousland and the Landsmeet the Queen's heart had again been sealed away.

Anora shuffled the sheets of vellum, stopping at the page for Bann Benson Trent, her dinner companion this evening. She quickly scanned her notes before rising. She forced enthusiasm she did not feel into her voice, "Come Erlina let us go prepare."

28 Haring, 9:35 Dragon

Gnawed Noble Tavern, Denerim

He sat at his table with three of his fellow nobles, two of whom also had marriageable sons and had their eyes on the throne just as he did. Their remaining companion, Bann Padraig, had two daughters who were both a few years yet from a betrothal. While Padraig might at first glance seem an odd choice of companion for their conversation, as it primarily related to the goings on in the palace, the man had one quality that guaranteed his welcome at this table – the man was an incurable gossip.

Padraig and many like him where in their element these days as so many nobles had remained in the capital for their sons to seek the Queen's favour and rumours over the comings and goings of the palace swept through the city like wildfire. Gossip had in effect become a second currency. One that could be more valuable than gold and buy the bearer favour, free meals, and drink, or it could be as worthless as the shit in Fort Drakon's stables. As with most things in life it was up to the buyer to determine the gossip's worth. While surely butterfly's like Padraig might have gleaned some useful information and pass it on, they were just as likely not to know or tell the entire truth at best or be used to spread outright lies at worst.

While he may personally loathe the talkative Bann, he like the others would hold their noses, buy his drinks, and treat Padraig with a respect he was not due, all in the hope that the chin-wag might let slip one small morsel that would advance their own cause. Of course, he was not so foolish to rely solely on information from men and women like Padraig when a throne was at stake. He, like the other men at his table with marriageable sons and the rest of the hopeful suitor's families, also bribed the guards and servants who might be in a better position to spy on the Queen and gain access to her thoughts. If one merely paid attention and looked closely then the signs of great wealth being spread throughout the commoners of Denerim was plain to see, from the full bellies to the bustling markets.

"I heard the Queen had her third dinner with Bann Benson Trent last night," Padraig said with a small smirk.

"Why would she waste her time with that indigent bastard," Bann Roderick MacFarlane said hotly. Roderick's words easily carried to the nearby tables and drew stares. The MacFarlane and Trent family holdings bordered each other in the central bannorn and throughout Ferelden's history their conflicts had as often as not resulted in blood being shed. There was little love between the families who often thought that one prospered only at the other's expense. "What can Trent provide other than a broken-down manor and some stringy chickens?" Roderick pounded on the table, drawing still more stares and nearly spilling their ales.

"I merely said they had dinner my good man," said Padraig coyly. "While I do not know the details, I have also heard that it did not go well for Benson and that he left the palace in a rage."

Their other dinner companion, Bann Thomas O'Reilly, burst out laughing at how Roderick had been played. The others quickly joined in.

The noble man looked at Padraig's laughing face with concealed disgust. No matter his uses and the noble's own desire to see Roderick humbled, he had a strong desire to punch the gossiping Bann. It was quite likely that Padraig had asked to join them solely to engender Roderick's display.

"And you my good man," Thomas said, smacking the shoulder of the noble man who sat beside him. "How progresses your son with our fair Queen?"

"Probably no better than your own son Thomas," the noble answered, giving nothing away. "The boy has his own silly ideas about choosing a bride for love." Feigned anger crept into his voice. His son was raised to know better than to think that he would marry for love. The marriage of the lad's own parents had been arranged when the noble's wife had been newly swaddled. "My son is very much like a horse. I can lead him to the water that is our Queen, but I cannot force him to drink."

"Be like that then, you bastard" Padraig muttered under his breath, spotting the lie.

Another round of ale was ordered and then another. Tongues began to loosen and true thoughts began to slip. Throughout the noble sat listening to the others as they spoke wide-eyed of the prestige of being a member of the royal family and what it might mean to their holdings. He joined in, speaking of fanciful dreams with little basis in reality for to do otherwise would draw suspicion. The noble listened as the men spoke of their sons becoming king, never prince, and wondered if he alone had gauged Anora correctly.

12 Wintermarch, 9:36 Dragon

Denerim

The noble put his arm around his son in a fatherly manner. "Are you prepared for your dinner with the Queen?"

"Yes father," the son who bore his name said with a resigned sigh.

"Where is your enthusiasm? Many would kill to be in your position."

"She is a cold bitch father. I cannot imagine spending my life with her, let alone dipping my cock into her – she'll probably freeze it off or her cunt will be so dry from disuse that I'll burn myself raw."

His son never expected the blow to the solar plexus that doubled him over and had him lying on the floor clutching his stomach.

"You worthless git! How many times must I explain this to you?" the noble stood over his cowering son. His fists were shaking from rage. "I do not care what your feelings are boy," he said coldly. "You will do your duty to this family. Am I clear?"

"Yes father," the son answered, not meeting his father's eyes.

"Perhaps I can put this in a manner that you will understand. When you go to the Pearl carousing with the whores do you spend your coin buying them a drink and do you whisper sweet words in their ear?" He saw his son blush faintly. Did the boy really believe that he had managed to disobey me without my knowing? He waited for an answer.

"Yes father I do."

"Why? You've already paid for her. Success is guaranteed."

"They are more active that way father. I enjoy myself more."

"If a whore bought and paid for needs such flattery and attention, why do you not think a Queen, whatever her manner, would not? All women seek such reassurances before spreading her legs and this one might make you royalty."

"But you told me I would only be a prince not a king."

The tone of son's voice was so whining that he wanted to strike the boy again, but unfortunately he could not afford to have his son show up beaten for dinner with the Queen. "I told you my thoughts and suspicions and think them likely, but remember boy from the throne we can secure new allies and firmly grasp the reins of power. Once complete...well suffice to say that no one lives forever, not even Queens."

His son gave a wide grin as if he finally grasped the plan to place him on the throne. The boy was not stupid, far from it he was cultured and well mannered, but he had no head for plots and intrigue. He took a step back, allowing his son to rise. "Go clean yourself and change into the clothes your mother selected for you." His son began to walk away and he called out, stopping him, "and Boy, if I hear that you've visited the Pearl again before Anora chooses a husband I will personally flog you to within a hands breadth of your life."

7 Guardian, 9:36 Dragon

Denerim Marketplace

The noble waited just down from the Wonders of Thedas near the warehouse for one of his eyes into the palace. While the elven girl was of no great importance, just a simple maid, she did have access to Anora bedchambers. While to date she had only confirmed the comings and goings of other suitors the noble still had hope that the girl would prove her worth.

"Greetings my Lord," the maid said with a bowed head. It had taken several meetings to stop her from curtsying to him. While it was common knowledge that most families were at least attempting to buy news from the palace it did not pay to advertise the fact.

"Greetings to you as well Verida. You come bearing news?" The noble passed over her silver.

The noble listened intently as the maid confirmed his reports from his other eyes in the palace. In the back of his mind he was already beginning to alter his plans to suit the changing whims of the Queen. When the maid had finished speaking she hesitated. "Is there something else?"

"As you may already know my Lord the Queen she is in bed with a fever," Verida said hesitantly. At a nod she continued. "I entered Her Majesty's bedroom to fetch her chamber pot and I heard the Queen call out a name in her sleep." She paused for drama. "No, please forgive me my Lord; I should not have brought it up. I am sure that it is nothing. The Queen is not herself."

The noble reached for his coin purse. The elven maid had skilfully baited her hook and he had bitten. He handed over the same amount of silver he had already given her thinking that the name had better be worth it. "The name?"

"The Queen called out for Teryn Cousland of Gwaren my Lord."

A string of profanities echoed in his head. Maker damn that Cousland whelp. Will he ever be free of that bastard? "Have you told this to anyone else?"

"No my Lord, this only occurred last night."

The noble withdrew two sovereigns and placed them in her small hand. "See to it that you do not speak of this to anyone else." The elf's face went wide from the wealth in her hand and she turned to leave. He grabbed her arm and pulled her back to face him. His eyes bored in on the girl.

"I swear my Lord I have told no one else."

He withdrew another three sovereigns and placed them in her hand. "If I find that you have spoken of this to anyone I will take back that gold from your hide and the hides of everyone you love."

"I swear by Andraste my Lord, I have told no one," Verida pleaded. She was crying and was shaking in fear despite the small fortune in her hand. "I swear my Lord."

He let the girl go and she quickly scampered away. After ensuring he was not being spying upon the noble entered the Wonders of Thedas and made a few small purchases to avoid suspicion. Throughout his browsing his mind roiled with what to do with Cousland. Even though the bastard was not in Denerim his shadow loomed large.

The noble decided to visit another member of their cabal, the self-styled _Merchant Prince of Ferelden, _Ewan Rhys in his shop. "Good day Ser, I am interested in procuring something unique as a gift for my wife and everyone says that you are the man to see. Is there someplace private where we might discuss my intentions and negotiate the cost?"

"Of course my Lord," Ewan said graciously, not by word or deed betraying that these two men already knew one another. "Please step this way into my office where I assure you your secrets are safe."

Once safely behind locked doors the noble felt free to talk. "I have a problem that I need resolved without any traces leading back to me. Am I correct that you have contacts that will serve?"

"That depends on the problem involved and the difficulty in solving it," Ewan answered.

"Aedan Cousland," he said to shocked eyes.

"Things aren't going well for your son I take it?"

"On the contrary, things are going as well as can be expected, and I need not remind you that we all will benefit if my son succeeds, but Cousland remains a thorn in all our sides that needs pulling."

"You'll get no argument from me," Ewan said. "That prick has cost me more coin than I can count, between levies to trade at Vigil's Keep, increased costs for guards to travel from Denerim with my goods, and the bloody elves thinking their entitled to be paid a human wage I'm going broke."

"How much have your costs increased?" the noble asked. While devoted to their cause Ewan was notoriously tight with a coin and lacked vision.

"Almost eight percent," the merchant growled.

"And your profits?"

"That's beside the point, my expenses are ruining me." Ewan met his fellow conspirator's stare until breaking. "Up twenty-six percent, but the cost."

"Do you have the right contacts to solve my problem?" the noble asked, bringing the conversation back on topic.

"Possibly, what did you have in mind?"

"You've been to Vigil's Keep, is there any chance of catching him unawares there?"

"Not likely, even with the construction there are guards everywhere. He does go on patrol with the Wardens but I suspect you don't want to take on twelve Wardens."

"Even if I desired it I doubt the kind who kills for coin would be easily convinced to test those odds."

"True enough, true enough," Ewan answered, and raised his steepled fingers to his mouth in thought. "He does travel back and forth to visit Highever often with his woman. Perhaps bandits could set upon him?"

The beginnings of a plan were soon constructed. There would be more to flesh out but the noble felt certain that Aedan Cousland would soon die.

* * *

_A/N: I just wanted to thank everyone for continuing to read this story, who placed it on alert or added it to their favourites - it certainly is a motivating factor to hurry up with the next chapter. I would especially like to thank those who leave a review or comment; it means a lot to me._ _Jay_


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: *** WARNING! *** Contains apologies, significant soul-bearing, and some catharsis):**

_So ah…what can I say? It's been so long between visits._

_At one point in time I did have a few legitimate reasons for setting this story aside. I was struggling with how best to introduce some new characters (the first of which you'll meet today) and also in fleshing them out. Mostly though, my arthritis was flaring up something awful. At its worst my hands had swollen up to look like uncooked sausages jutting out from tenderized ground beef, and the thought of spending even one extra second at the keyboard filled me with such dread that I was reduced to a quivering, teary-eyed baby. Having said that, and in all honesty, those reasons are long since gone (although my hands continue to flare up every so often - c'est la vie)._

_The simple truth for the lack of updates is one that I'm sure you all already know: that once something is set aside it's easy to ignore it._

_For that I am sorry to everyone who reads and (hopefully) enjoys this story, but mostly to myself because I have found that I honestly do like to write, even when I'm struggling to push on. Going forward I made a vow to myself that I wouldn't begin posting a new story of FFdotnet until I had it pretty much complete. Of course that still leaves a couple of 'hanging' uncompleted stories for me to worry about, this being one of them._

_They say it takes 21 days to make (or remake) a habit. While I might like to update with new chapters every day for three solid weeks I honestly don't think that's reasonable and still be sane afterward. What I will endeavour to do is set time aside to write something, even if its just future plot points, each day and try to keep to at worst a bi-weekly update schedule until my other mouldy cheese smelling story 'Betrayal of Love and Trust' is finished (updating Betrayal on the 'off' week from this story). Once 'Betrayal' is complete I will then do my damnedest to move to weekly schedule with this story._

_While I haven't updated this story for some time I have continued to write some of the later scenes for it (mostly Aedan/Leliana as they're the most fully formed characters in my head and therefore easiest to write). These scenes will, perhaps optimistically thinking on my behalf, only require some minor work and the addition of other points of view and/or plot points to finish them off - there's probably 10 to 20 chapters partially written like this (depending on what's added and how they're split)._

_Meaning no disrespect to others here on FFdotnet it can be frustrating when as a reader you get invested in a story and then the updates just stop. It kind of feels like the author has broken some kind of covenant with you, the reader, and I never want/wanted to do this myself so for that I again offer my apologies. It can be so incredibly hard though. We all have real lives and ever increasing demands on our time: families and friends, jobs and/or school, health issues, a beautiful summer's day or evening too good to spend inside at the PC, or maybe it's just the new episode of our favourite TV show. With that in mind I hope you see free to cut me and every other writer a bit slack if we (I) occasionally miss targets. To steal a lyric from John Lennon's Beautiful Boy - life is what happens to you; while you're busy making other plans. For my part, I promise that I will finish any story I have started posting - barring Mayan or Zombie apocalypse - neither of which seems likely._

**Since it has been awhile allow me to quickly recap the story so far:**

_During the final battle with the Archdemon Aedan Cousland is grievously injured (becoming a dragon snack and swallowing Archdemon blood is generally not conducive to good health) and while conscious is slowly dying. Allistair, fearing his fellow Warden won't even be able to deliver the final blow, takes it himself, sacrificing himself in the process. Aedan had never planned for Allistair to take the final blow. He had tried to arrange things so that he would do it, leaving behind letters in Redcliffe castle for his companions/acquaintances to be delivered after he was gone. While lying in a coma after the final battle and with no one sure if Aedan would live, those letters were delivered and read by the addressees. We've seen two so far - the one for Fergus and the one for Aedan's lover, Leliana._

_With memories of the Blight fresh and opinion of the Grey Wardens high, Queen Anora grants Amaranthine to the Wardens and Gwaren to Aedan (even though at the time he was still lying comatose and near death). Anora's not too sure what to think of Aedan at this point._

_Aedan wakes and along with Fergus and Leliana travels to Highever to recover. Leliana and Aedan draw even closer. He tells the bard of the cost of being a Warden and the childless, violent life he can offer her. It breaks his heart but Aedan asks Leliana to leave him and go to Haven with a Chantry expedition intending to study Andraste's funerary temple. Aedan doesn't want Leliana to make a hasty decision and continue to stand by him, a decision which he feels she easily might later regret._

_Aedan returns to Vigil's Keep in time for the events of Awakening (which are briefly touched upon). Anora arrives with the royal army in the aftermath of the attack on the Vigil and sees a different side of Aedan as he valiantly fights for his people. Eventually Aedan travels to Haven and he and Leliana renew their commitment to each other, even though they can't be together yet._

_Anora and Aedan (among others) work together restoring Ferelden and Anora finds herself increasingly drawn to Aedan. The pressure is on for Anora to marry and have children. She decides Aedan is the best choice, he politely declines._

_Aedan confesses to Leliana about Anora and for a time the queen becomes a wedge between them. During this period the increasingly distant pair travel to Weisshaupt and back through Orlais. They have a few adventures which are briefly commented upon. They arrive back in Ferelden more tightly bound than ever, having shared their deepest hopes, dreams, and fears with one another._

_Fergus remarries and eventually Aedan asks Anora to approve his own marriage to Leliana. Anora burns the request. More time passes. Fergus and his wife Diana announce she is with child. Pressure continues to build upon Anora to marry and have children, with whispers that her continued rule hinges upon their quick resolution. While Fergus is the eldest and has an heir on the way (tidying up succession) many in the Landsmeet instead look to Aedan for leadership._

_We also learn that there is a secret cabal of Fereldens who collectively plot to increase their power and wealth and they don't seem to like Aedan._

_One final 'housekeeping' note. Anders couldn't have been at Fergus' wedding as originally written in chapter 15 as he was in Kirkwall. This has been corrected. You may now safely assume that I have an idea for some of Kirkwall's denizens to play a small role in the story, but it's not a cross-over rather more a crossing of paths._

_Now back to where we left off…_

* * *

**Chapter 20**

15 Guardian, 9:36 Dragon

Somewhere east-north-east of Ansburg in the Free Marches; a deserted stretch along the banks of the Minanter River

_There are eight ways I could kill her from this position; three of them in one quick simple move._ Zevran thought as he gazed down upon the elfin woman beneath him.

He thrust half-heartedly into her again, eliciting a mewl of pleasure from her painted lips. He felt her legs wrap around him, urging him deeper.

_ Why can't I simply relax and enjoy myself?_

To Zevran sex was something to be enjoyed. It was to be savoured and indulged in like a fine wine or a delicious meal. Even when it was bad, he still believed that sex was still one of life's great pleasures. The former Antivan Crow had had sex with avowed enemies before, men and women both, and even when wary of taking an unexpected dagger had never failed to at least take his own pleasure.

From prior experience Zevran knew that the adventuresome, delectable, supple, and extremely dangerous woman was incapable of having bad sex. She was arousing and skillful enough to command top dollar as either courtesan or whore anywhere in Thedas. In fact she probably had commanded top dollar during her training, before her other skills had achieved their keen edge and became more profitable. He had sampled her fruit before, deciding it was among the best he had ever known, so why couldn't he enjoy himself now. Certainly the elven woman, Naike, was enjoying herself, but why wasn't he? Was it because at any moment he expected those fine, seemingly delicate hands presently clutching the blanket beneath her to produce a knife and attack him or was it because a part of him wished for her to.

_ Was Naike his enemy or was she something else?_ _If something else, what was she?_ It did not seem appropriate to call her a friend. Also, despite their present activity, it did not seem right to call her a lover, at least not in the truest sense of the word.

Perhaps sensing his distraction Naike moved quickly, putting Zevran onto his back and with her astride him, her hands braced on his bare chest. She resumed her movements, taking him completely.

_ Now there are four ways to kill her. Only one for which she doesn't know the counter. _Sten had taught him that one in exchange for Zevran teaching him a few tricks of the Crows. All things considered Zevran considered it a fair exchange, especially if one day, perhaps today, it saved his life.

Zevran looked up at the lithe elf atop him. The first word any honest person would use to describe her, even before elf, was beautiful. The second word…that would depend upon on how well the person knew her and the nature of that knowledge - beguiling, coquettish, demure, exotic, intelligent, intriguing, brazen, frustrating, intimidating, profane, sensual, dangerous, and deadly - were only a few that easily came to mind. She was like a chameleon, changing her colour and manner to match her surroundings, adapting to whatever would best suited her needs.

Her shoulder-length midnight black hair hung down wildly, partially obscuring her green eyes. Their colour was so rich that it reminded Zevran of flawlessly cut emeralds. In a woman blessed with many physical gifts those eyes were perhaps her most striking feature. Then there were her soft facial features which drew the eye and aroused a longing in the viewer, usually to ravage or protect; again whatever the situation called for. Those features were then coupled with the graceful body of an elvish dancer, soft and supple and yet firm beneath one's hand.

Naike moved her hands behind her, her left hand brushing against his right leg and nearing her armour, carelessly tossed to the side. Zevran tensed in anticipation.

Suddenly she was closely atop Zevran: the nipples of her pert breasts pressing against his chest, demanding his attention; her hands cupping his face; and her mouth against his, her tongue splitting his lips.

He was frozen with indecision. Not a circumstance the handsome elf typically found himself in when intimate with another. Normally instinct could be relied upon if nothing else.

Naike leaned back, pulling Zevran's bottom lip out between her clenched teeth, as she raised her torso. Zevran started to rise as well, since he was being pulled along. She pushed him back down, flat on his back. He could feel a drop of blood on his lip, where it had been torn from Naike's teeth.

"Zev," the elf said in a surprisingly sultry voice. "Never before has someone been so disinterested while fucking me. You are making me think I'm losing my touch." As she spoke Naike slid her hand down the side of his chest, across her thigh, then his, before gently running her fingernails up his inner thigh and then taking a firm grip on his scrotum with the last words.

"Ah mi amor, there isn't a man or woman alive who does not dream of gaining your favour. Who does not long to be where I am now. It is a blessing."

Naike laughed, releasing her hold on him. "Does that really work for you Zev?"

"More often than you might think carina," he said before joining her in laughter.

"What is it Zev? I would think that you would be more energetic considering what we are celebrating." With her information and more importantly her direct physical aid they had defeated and killed the latest Crows eager to collect on the contract for Zevran's head. "Were you not taught that sex and violence are merely two sides of the same coin?"

_ She would know considering we were taught by many of the same instructors._ The old Zevran, the Zevran prior to Rinna and before the ill-fated attempt on the lives of the last two Grey Wardens of Ferelden, would certainly be celebrating the blood spilt today. He would be foolishly celebrating the deaths of his enemies and moving ever closer toward his goals. That Zevran was always confident and secure in his skill both with a blade and in the bedroom, or in this case the blanket. Of course that Zevran never wished for anything more than skin deep. Pleasure, like lives, was to be taken and used for whatever value it held. Once finished, there was always another. Nothing ever lasted.

Zevran knew he had changed since the time Aedan had spared his life and perhaps knowingly had given him a chance to claim a new life solely of his own making. Had he changed enough to again want the things he had thought lost with Rinna's death? Did he want all those things and more with Naike? Did she? Could she?

He did not know and further did not know how to explain them to Naike, who unlike him did not name herself a _former_ Antivan Crow.

…

_Just over two years ago, outside Bastion, Antiva_

**SNAP**

Zevran awoke from his light slumber with the noise of the breaking twig. It was followed a heartbeat later by the sounds of flames and cries of pain as the trap was sprung. The elf didn't look to see what his trap had caught, instead reaching into the quiver between his legs for an arrow, nocking it, and began looking for targets. While confident in his skills, both in avoiding being tracked and also in laying traps he had, nevertheless, taken steps to ensure his safety, knowing it was precarious.

He had set up his meager camp prior to entering Bastion to conduct his business. He had pitched his tent and had set many of the traps dotting the area. Upon his return he had set even more traps before building a small fire, now extinguished, and settling in to wait.

While he would have preferred a clean escape he had still prepared for the worst, knowing that a camp and the chance to catch him unaware would provide an irresistible lure to any pursuers. They would have expected to find traps and he had given them some to find, camouflaged enough that they'd have to work for it, but perhaps catching a few of the stupider ones; although he had not expected any of those. Others he was confident that no one but him could find until it was too late.

Taking advantage of the terrain, he had laid his traps out so that even if they were disarmed, they were still gradually funnelling his pursuers into a narrower and narrower space - the killing field for his present sheltered vantage point - yards removed from his camp and half that distance up one of the great trees of the forest; almost at the limits of his keen elven eyesight. He had remained in his drakeskin armour, fully armed and holding his bow in his right hand; prepared for battle. About the only thing that had not gone according to plan was that his unwanted, but not altogether unexpected pursuers, had arrived when he had been catching a quick rest. It would have been better had he caught sight of them earlier.

Despite what his friend Aedan would say Zevran had always been good at planning his ambushes, always thinking of them in three dimensions. However, Morrigan with her ability to turn into and think as an animal had shown him how limited his previous thinking had been. His best hiding spots had been laid bare to one who had the eyes of a hawk, the nose of a wolf, or the cunning of a fox. Her teachings had saved his life many times over and might again today. Assuming he survived and that one day he saw Morrigan again Zevran would give her his honest thanks. Then he would slip a blade into her heart for abandoning them on the eve of the final battle of the Blight. A quick, clean death was the least he could give the witch as repayment for all that she had taught him.

Zevran continued to watch from the relative safety of his hunter's blind as his pursuers whittled in number, allowing the traps to do their work. For now he contented himself by picking off those who prowled along the edges seeking to flank his perceived position. From this vantage point he could see the look of surprise on their faces as an arrow appeared as if by magic in the centre of their chest. Sadly he ran out of arrows with which to dispatch the last of his pursuers, the four who carefully were nearing the edge of where his camp awaited. He had killed enough from his blind that they would know he was not in his tent. Besides which even if he had once been asleep the noise from traps being set off would have awoken him and he would have fled to a more a defensible position. Given his current actions his former comrades in the Crows might think Zevran had a death wish, but they wouldn't believe anyone trained as they had been would be so foolish as to remain in his camp. Perhaps if they killed him and decided to search his tent for plunder they would find his gift to them - a final bit of revenge and spite for his former masters.

He grabbed a hold of a nearby vine that he knew would safely take him down. With both feet on the ground Zevran quickly discarded his bow and set off toward his other waiting surprise, which like the one in his tent was a parting gift from Dworkin Glavonak.

As he neared the lyrium grenade, now rigged as a stationary device that Dworkin named a land-mine (dwarves and their strange naming choices), the assassin slowed and carefully chose his cover. He picked up a stick and threw it past the land-mine, landing between it and his pursuers, and drawing the attention of the Crows who were slowly approaching.

The Crows neared the land-mine, stopping a few yards away from where it was hidden.

_ Brasca, _Zevran cursed under his breath.

"Zevran, its Rodrigo. I do not understand why you came back to Antiva. While you know the Crows would never forget, you were safe hiding in the Dog Lord's shadow provided you did nothing to draw the Masters' attention. Instead you return to Antiva itself and wage war upon your betters."

"Why would you care Rodrigo? Why would any of you care? Am I not providing a means for your own ascent up the ranks? Carlos was an ignorant pig, Juanita a petty and callous bitch, and Diego was deserving of far worse than what I did to him."

"You cut off Master Diego's cock and fed it to him before you killed him," Rodrigo answered.

"Every Crow should thank me for that. Each of you wanted to do the same at some point. The man was a monster."

"True, but it should have been one of us. A Crow, not some failed fledgling. Or are you trying to buy your way back into the Masters' good graces? If so, I warn you Zevran you have gone about it the wrong way. Killing their own does not ingratiate you to those Masters that remain. It only reminds them of their own vulnerabilities. Neither do the ones who rise to replace those you kill hold you in high regard."

"A Fledgling am I," Zevran said with feigned anger, hoping to enrage their leader and draw the Crows in to the waiting land-mine. "I was filling contracts while you were still having your ass filled at the Gilded Cage." Zevran could hear Rodrigo's teeth grinding before responding through clenched teeth.

"Despite all you have done Zevran if you surrender now I swear I will give you a quick death."

"Will it painless _old friend_?"

"Relatively."

Zevran did not need to look at his 'old friend' to see the cold smirk on his face. Nor did he expect that his death at Rodrigo's hands would be either quick or painless. Zevran knew him enough to sense that Rodrigo was barely restraining his anger. Even if Rodrigo was successful and killed him, a great many Crows had fallen against a solitary former Crow already marked for death. The Masters wished Zevran dead, but they did not reward stupidity. Rodrigo would have to bring him back alive if he had any hope of profit. One final push was needed to send him over the edge.

Zevran moved both daggers into his left hand and then quietly drew a small throwing knife. He had no illusions that the knife would kill any of the remaining Crows. They were too well trained and wary of him to fall for that. With luck though, it might be enough to bait them in.

He heard one of the Crows begin to move. He was running out of time. He could not allow them to split up and have one set off the mine early. He wanted them together.

"Very well Rodrigo. I am coming out," Zevran said. As soon as he caught sight of the lead Crow Zevran threw the small knife. He had already taken two steps backward and transferred one of the daggers from his left hand back to his right before the thrown blade clattered uselessly off Rodrigo's armoured chest.

The Crows advanced. Too late Zevran looked away from the blast, the flash momentarily blinding him. He heard the moans of pain even before the echoes of the explosion ceased.

As Zevran had known it would be, the armour the Crows wore was no match for Dworkin's innovation. He advanced to the now clear area, prepared to finish what these Crows had started.

He saw Rodrigo twitching in pain after somehow surviving the blast. The others were not so lucky having taken the brunt of the blast. Rodrigo was missing part of his right arm, his legs were both bent in unnatural angles, and his face was a crimson mask of blood.

"I give you a far quicker death than you would have ever given me," Zevran said softly as he moved to finish Rodrigo off. The Crow tried to spit a mouthful of blood at him, but like many things in Rodrigo's soon to be ended life it fell short. With a thrust of a blade it was done.

While eager to be away from this place, Zevran was not so eager to leave enemies at his back. Besides, there were supplies to retrieve, not the least of which was his last precious gift from Dworkin. For the next hour or so Zevran moved through the wilderness, carefully disabling his traps and ensuring that any Crows he found were indeed dead.

He was nearly finished when he came across her, a young elven Crow that he judged to be a little older than twenty years. She was unconscious from shock and blood loss after having a bamboo spike driven into her just above the hip. For some reason, whether due to her beauty or due to having to give a final peace to many more Crows maimed by his traps than he had expected, Zevran decided not to kill her right away. He told himself that he spared her, temporarily, merely to gather information about his former masters; that he could always kill her later.

The former Crow retrieved a vial of sleeping draught from a pouch on his belt and carefully placed three drops on her tongue, too much of the undiluted draught would kill her before she could answer his questions. With no fear of her waking, Zevran next prepared a compress drenched with the contents of a healing poultice. Once done he carefully cut away her armour, removed the bamboo spike, and poured the remainder of the healing poultice directly into the wound before applying the compress and binding it to her with bandages. Her wound, while serious, was not as bad as Zevran had originally thought, somehow the spike had missed her vitals.

It took several trips but finally Zevran had a new camp established a moderate distance from his original one for both he and his unexpected guest. By this time she had bled through her bandages, which he removed. He cleaned her wound and reapplied a new compress before tightly binding her feet, her hands and even a few of her fingers. He was fighting second thoughts: about not killing the Crow before she awakened, and about being too close to Bastion. However, considering the effort he had put into keeping her alive it seemed somewhat foolish to slit the Crow's throat without at least first hearing what she had to say.

A part of Zevran recognized the absurdity of these events, so reminiscent of his own failed assassination of Aedan and Alistair. Surely the Wardens had debated his death before Aedan had finally woke him. Of course, he had spoken freely and had even offered his loyalty to those he had been sent to kill, which they had accepted, but then he was far different from any other Crow. He had taken the contract on Ferelden's Grey Wardens hoping that he might die in the attempt and in so doing be free of the Crows. He had no loyalty to Howe or Loghain and even less for his former masters. This beautiful Crow was unlikely to be in a similar situation, despite the sticky end she would wake to find herself in.

Zevran was just finishing his dinner when he saw the female Crow's eyelids flutter. Silently he watched her as she feigned sleep and began to take stock of her present circumstances.

"Too late carina, I already know that you are awake." She opened her emerald eyes. "If you are hungry, and provided we can reach an understanding, there is some fresh rabbit I saved for you."

She decided to talk, stalling for time. While bound she could feel that her wounds had been tended to. If Arainai had intended to torture her it would have been far easier to accomplish with an open wound. Had he intended to simply kill her he would have already done so. Instead it seemed he wished to talk. Truly Arainai had gone soft. If she played this correctly she might even convince him to let her go.

"What do you wish to know Master Arainai?"

"So easy? Have you no honour, no respect for the code of the Crows?"

"You and I both know the honour of the Masters, and the price for failure on a contract."

"Yes, but that was the late Rodrigo's failure not yours. I am certain a cunning minx like you could come up with a thousand reasons why she was absent for the battle with the lone renegade Crow which tragically cost the lives of Rodrigo and all those under him."

"All of them?" the Crow asked.

"All who were not smart enough to flee when they realized that they had walked into a spider's web of traps." If any Crows had indeed fled their lives were now forfeit, the penalty no different that if they had failed on a mission. Normally this Crow's life would be forfeit as well, but as he checked her wounds and once again searched her to ensure that she was disarmed, he only saw the one Crow tattoo on the base of her neck, easily hidden by her hair or a dress. For better or more likely ill, one of the Masters had watched over her. Protecting this young Crow as the Master used the fledgling for his or her own purposes. He could see why. In an order of assassins that often prized beauty as much as raw ability and talent she would still eclipse all but a handful. If anyone could find their way back into the Crow's graces it was this beautiful creature, favoured by one of the Masters.

The bound and injured Crow seemed at a loss over the fact that one man had killed over a dozen of her comrades.

"First carina, tell me your name and then how you came to try and collect on the contract for my life."

She decided to answer truthfully. While unlikely, he might already know her identity and the truth might also help push him toward setting her free.

"My name is Naike. I was never a part of the contract on you. My misfortune was being in Bastion completing only my second solo contract and that my mark was staying in the same inn as the one in which you saw fit to feed Master Diego his balls."

"Only his cock carina," Zevran corrected.

"Huh? What did you do with his balls?"

"Those sad little morsels were even less of a meal than his excuse of a cock. I sent them to the Grand Master. He should receive them in a few days."

Naike could not help but laugh, a true, honest laugh. While in her opinion not the worst of the Masters, Diego had died far better than he had deserved.

"Continue please," Zevran said once her laughter had ended.

"As I said my mark, a merchant who had failed to meet the terms of his agreement with one of the great trading houses, was also staying at the same inn. When Master Diego's body was discovered by Lucius it created a commotion. Seeing as I how had just killed a man I set about leaving Bastion immediately and returning to Antiva City. Sadly Rodrigo recognized me slipping away from the inn, at first thinking that I had slain Master Diego. Once they were satisfied that I had not killed Master Diego I was pressed into service to go after you with them. I do not know how they knew it was you."

"That was my doing carina. Although I will admit I had not expected Diego's body to be found so quickly."

"That is your doing as well then Master Arainai," Naike responded. "Because of you the Masters now rarely take on any contracts, and when they do they bring some of those loyal to them to serve as guards."

"Master assassins in need of guards! And they wonder why they must die."

"Why do kill them?" Naike asked. "You are free," she added softly.

"For now, suffice to say, it is because I am free as you put it."

While Zevran was no longer under the direct control of the Crows and might therefore be considered free, no one who survived their training could ever truly be free. He saw that now, after being shown the meaning and value of true friendship by Aedan, Leliana, and others. He was not so naive as to believe that Thedas did not need assassins or that some people simply needed killing, but how could he explain his reasons to this young Crow. That he hoped that by killing the Masters who abused, tortured, and finally swept them all away like garbage he might truly find his freedom and put the past behind him. Perhaps in doing so, others might find a certain semblance of peace and a new breed of Crow might emerge. Not that he was overly optimistic that would happen. Even if it did come to pass Zevran knew that he would never count himself among them. He decided to try and explain at least the part he thought she might understand.

"That is very ambitious," Naike said once Zevran had finished.

"If my past has proven anything carina, ambition is not something I lack. Nor is a keen eye for beauty, leather goods, or a boundless supply of stamina and the skill to use it." While he had no doubt that bedding Naike would be enjoyable, he certainly had no intentions of doing so. He merely wanted to judge her reaction to this and to everything else they had spoken of. He may yet have to slay her before the day was done.

"Would my assistance in your undertaking be worth sparing my life?"

"And just how could you assist me?" he asked coldly.

"As you no doubt realize the stink of Rodrigo's failure does not reflect on me. I fulfilled my contract in Bastion and if you are to believed then no one left alive knows I was ever here. Nothing prevents me from returning to Antiva City and resuming my duties for the Crows, except now I will have additional duties - reporting on the progress on the Crow's search for you and on the Master's movements so that you can find and kill them. If you agree there is only one thing I ask."

Zevran nodded for you to continue.

"There are two Masters which I want to kill myself."

"Which ones?" he asked.

"Kavan and Gabriel."

"The Grand Master and the Master likely to succeed him. Now who is being ambitious."

Despite being bound Naike shrugged her shoulders and gave him a devilish smile.

Zevran did not truly believe the young Crow, but decided she had earned enough of a reprieve for him to alter her bindings so that she might eat. He would continue to watch her carefully and they would talk. He would test this young Crow's loyalties and see if she might become a useful tool. Perhaps even if he ultimately decided she was of no use it might still be worthwhile to let her live. She could always bring back word of Rodrigo's fate. And if she instead decided to force his hand - while he did not like to kill pretty things even a rosebush needed pruning.

…

A somewhat playful slap brought his thoughts back to the present. Naike, despite her often brutal training as a Crow, was still a beautiful woman and as such was accustomed to being the centre of attention, most especially from the man inside her.

"I was replaying today's encounter in my mind. Even with your magnificent blades it had been a near thing." It was true enough even if it was not the entire truth.

Another slap delivered with a little more force clearly expressed Naike's displeasure. "Shall I just leave you alone then and take care of myself?"

"Forgive me my sweet dove. Give me another chance to redeem my good name."

"Dove?" she asked, curious as to his thoughts.

"It seems wrong to call you a Crow considering what we are doing. I thought perhaps a dove might suit better since my adorations of mi amor and carina fall on deaf ears."

"A dove," Naike said, considering it. "I approve."

Her emerald eyes sparkled as she gave Zevran a smile that despite his doubts set his heart aflame. She leaned forward, once again pressing her chest to his, her eyes looking into his and their lips not quite touching. "Although you would do well to remember that this dove still has the talons of a Crow, especially when after saving his life she finds her lover disinterested while sharing her bed."

"It's a blanket carina," Zevran said with a chuckle as he raised his hips, giving her a quick strong thrust.

"It goes double for blankets Zev." Naike kissed her lover fiercely.

While still uncertain over his feelings for Naike this time Zevran had no problem meeting expectations, giving and receiving pleasure.

…

Zevran awoke the following morning. Naike was pressed against his side with her hand on his chest. The warmth of her body was making his skin tingle wherever they touched. Trying not to wake her he began to move, intending to fetch some water, wash, dress, and begin preparing their breakfast, although not necessarily in that order.

"Zev?" Naike asked sleepily.

"It is only I my sweet dove." Naike again smiled at the mention of her new adoration. "Go back to sleep and I shall wake you when your meal is ready. That is unless you would like breakfast in bed?"

"It's a blanket Zev." Naike thrust her hips against the side of his leg. They both burst into laughter.

"I am onto your tricks now, my silken seductress." He leaned over and kissed her before pulling on his trousers.

Once their morning rituals were done and their breakfast finished the pair of elves sat, simply enjoying the moment until one spoke.

"Zev, what really was troubling you last night?" Naike asked. She knew that if she did not get answer before they broke camp that she never would.

Zevran stifled a curse, killing it before it passed his lips. Naike read him too well. It was foremost of the many reasons why he could never be certain that she would not either kill him or betray him to the Crows. These last few years could all be some long con where she would aid him for however long it suited her own purposes before finally casting his spent husk aside when he was no longer of use.

"What do you see for yourself in the future my sweet dove," he asked instead. It was a trick he had learned from Aedan. Aedan often answered a question with his own seemingly unrelated question before eventually bringing the conversation back to his answer to the original question. While frustrating Zevran had to admit that it usually brought on a new understanding or awareness of possibilities.

Slightly annoyed at being put off, Naike decided to play along for now, but she would have her answer. "I do not really think much of the future beyond Kavan and Gabriel."

Crows were beaten down and trained not to focus on the future beyond completing their mission and advancing through the ranks. Through successful assassinations and the timely elimination of those standing in your way lay the riches, rights, and privileges that come with rank. Successful murder was the spring from which all of life's bounty flowed. The things others looked to: a wife or husband, children, or a home were a weakness; a senseless distraction that could only get you killed. Need the comfort of another? The Crows owned many brothels if one wanted to look outside their comrades. A child? Many Masters and a select few of the most senior Crows 'adopted' a younger Crow, as what had been done to Naike. Sadly, this was no relationship as existed between a parent and child, but rather akin to the one between cat and mouse. And just like the cat, the Masters were experts at playing with their food.

She paused, collecting her thoughts. "I suppose once I kill Kavan and Gabriel I will have to decide whether I can stay in Antiva City or will have to leave. It is unlikely the remaining Masters will accept me as their equal…unless you become the Grand Master," she added hopefully.

"My days as a Crow are in the past," Zevran interrupted, firmly and with absolute certainty.

"What is Ferelden like then?"

Zevran tamped down any foolish expectations that might arise from her question. Naike had definitely changed during the time he had known her. A time during which many of the cracks in the Crows indoctrination of her had become outright holes, but even still Zevran did not believe Naike meant it in the way he might consider it.

"It is a cold, harsh place, quite different from Antiva or even the Free Marches to which in many ways it is closest. While slow to trust, the people are quite warm once you've proven yourself to them. Gain their loyalty and there are few better to have at your side."

"If that is the case then why isn't your friend, the Warden, here? We could have used his help today."

"Aedan is not here because this is not his fight. He is where he is needed most," Zevran said somewhat protectively. "Do not doubt that if I asked, Aedan would be here, and the Crows if they were smart would quiver in the boots at the sight of him."

It sounded like hyperbole to Naike. Like the boasts freshly minted Crows made. Except she knew the Warden was someone even the Masters viewed with caution. They might be confident that they could kill him at a time and place of their choosing, but from what Naike remembered she suspected that no Master would want to face the Warden alone in a fair fight.

"Where was I? Like the people Ferelden can be a surprisingly beautiful country. Perhaps not quite up to the standards of our own fair land or even Orlais or Nevarra, but there is still beauty there. To wake on a clear crisp winter morning and find the world covered in the purity of freshly fallen snow or to see the sun set over the Frostbacks; I confess, both have nearly brought me to tears."

While not unheard of in Antiva, snow was a rare occurrence in his homeland with many Antivans never having seen it unless they had travelled abroad. Even for the Crows, who travelled more extensively than most, many would fail to see snow in their lifetime. As a rule Antivans were a warm blooded people who could happily do without the cold. Zevran still didn't particularly like it either, but he would admit to enjoying that first glance after a fresh snowfall.

"And the dogs."

"Yes, the dogs. But not dogs like you see here. Theirs are great big war-dogs - the mabari, a breed unlike any other. In Ferelden it is considered a great honour to have one."

"Perhaps if I am ever in Ferelden I will buy one."

"You do not understand carina. Even though you might offer a king's ransom for a pup, no decent breeder would sell you one unless the pup has first chosen you. That is partly why it is considered an honour. From my own experiences alongside a mabari I would have to agree."

After a brief pause Naike asked, "How did we end up talking about dogs? You were supposed to answer me about last night."

"In a manner of thinking I did better. I showed you what I was thinking about," Zev said smugly. "I was thinking of the future." _**Mine…Yours…Ours?**_ "Even in your heavenly embrace such a subject can easily fill one's head and leave a mind distracted."

He continued, changing to a serious manner. Carefully he studied her eyes and face, looking for the reaction to his next words.

"The Crows do not think to look too far in the future. There is only the contract and the Crows themselves. Fortunately for us, I name myself a _former_ Crow, and you _mi amor_ are not a Crow, but rather a dove. We are both free to think of whatever we wish."

Naike smiled. It wasn't the smile she had taken to giving him when he called her dove, but it was something. He had opened the door for her. All Zevran could do now was encourage her to take the next few steps and join him on the other side.

* * *

_**A/N:** Sorry to put even more notes at the end of the chapter, but these notes deal with how I suspect the Crows are run in the absence of evidence to the contrary and without the filters required for mass consumption of a commercial product._

_To my mind the Crows are power politics at their absolute worst: abuse (physical, mental, and sexual), deceit, violence against one's peers, and an overriding cutthroat mentality are all just parts of the game. One advances in the Crows not only by successfully completing contracts but also by eliminating rivals. It's similar to a zero-sum game - for you to advance upward (win), someone else has to fall (lose) or Hobbs' natural state of man (before joining a society), 'a war of all men against all men' (Never thought I'd get to use that - EVER! - or worse that I'd pretty much remember the words correctly before double checking it - it's been a looong time since I was required to read Leviathan)._

_The Masters sitting at the top of the pyramid have a vested interest in subjugating every Crow and prospective Crow (called fledglings in this story and viewed as an insult to any full Crow or higher) beneath them. Their continued power, wealth, and survival depend on it. One day each Master will find them self a little older, having lost a bit of their reflexes, and some younger hotshot will come gunning for them. To postpone that day the Masters start establishing their superiority and dominance early, often, and using every trick in the book. Short of skimping on their training everything else is fair game (if the Crow brand lost its cachet that would negatively affect their own earnings, skimmed off the top of each contract. The Crows don't have a retirement plan, but while alive a Master can live like a king). Even below the masters there exists a clearly defined pecking order, and fight for dominance, amongst all Crows._

_From canon we know that Crow training is brutal and that many die, even before they are set upon each other as a final test. Only the survivors prove themselves worthy. Crow training is designed to weed out the weak while providing the prospective Crow with the martial skills needed to succeed. Training is also designed to desensitize him/her to the act of murder for hire. For that same reason I have written in that the Crows own interests in brothels. Brothels provide opportunities to gather information, a known location to take out marks, and a potential supply of new recruits from any offspring. I posit that before they become full Crows each prospect would have to spend time in a 'finishing school' brothel working as a whore/gigolo. By doing this the Crows further desensitize their recruits and remove the very idea of compassionate or real love. Sex for a Crow becomes a means to an end, to be used if the contract requires it or to satisfy one's physical needs, but never with emotions entering into it._

_Abuse of fledglings might cause the abused to internalize and become an even more a cold-blooded killer than their training conditions them (not necessarily a bad thing from their POV) or it might cause some to plot revenge on their abusers (not too different from those already scheming to take up the role of Master when viewed from a Crow Master POV). It might also 'break' the abused in which case the fledgling was never going to survive training anyways so from a Crow POV there wasn't any 'real' loss. What the abuse might also do in any of those cases is give the abuser Crow (Master or other) faced with a challenger that one extra second (s)he needs to survive a life and death situation._

_Even in my darker, Hobbesian version of the Crows I do not believe that the incidence of sexual abuse would be much greater than societal averages today. The incidence of physical and mental abuse would be significantly higher, if for no other reason than the goal of their training - to train assassins._

_The abuse suffered by Zevran, Naike, and every other Crow is not the focus of this story. I am neither qualified nor intending to write that story. Any future references to abuse suffered by anyone (Crow or otherwise) will, for the most part, be short on specifics. What I'm trying to do here in this note is provide some insight into the shared experiences of the Crows that might help explain their actions and ways of thinking while still providing enough gray areas for you, the reader, to shade in the remainder yourself. I also want to provide Zevran with another, more personal, reason for interacting with the Crows beyond the eventual assassination attempt that I swear is eventually coming - revenge for Rinna and himself. While the relationship between Aedan & Zevran is close, and Zev would no doubt help Aedan against the Crows anyway, I wanted to add another layer to Zevran's role in this story. From the epilogues to DA:O there are several scenarios where Zevran returns to Antiva and takes control over the Crows, although we are not really provided with the reasons why. Could this be one reason why Zevran assumes control of the Crows? I've written than he has a vision for them, but at present he seems certain that apart from killing some more Masters his future does not include the Crows. I know the answer since I've already written the ending, but I'm not telling yet._

_When I originally began to write this story (so very, very long ago) I didn't care much for Zevran as a character. Between replaying DA:O (again so very long ago) and mostly by reading some of the fine works on this site my opinion of him today has changed for the better (he's still not my favourite, but he's no longer bringing up the rear). Like most of BioWare's characters there is far more to Zev than the lothario assassin we see at first glance. They have provided a solid base for us gamers and FF readers and writers to add onto with our imagination._

_I think that overall Zevran is right up there with Wynne as the most comfortable and self assured companion/main character from DA:O, and yet somehow in a game filled with tragic, flawed, and damaged characters he might just be the most 'broken' one. By adding Naike into the mix I, hopefully, will get Zevran to face a few truths about himself. His adventures and the friends he made during Blight have certainly moved him forward from the character we first meet in the game, but there's still room for him to grow. That is provided he's given a reason and chooses to seize it, which is not a certainty._

_So to summarize my thoughts on how the Crows operate:_

_Internal Crow Politics - cutthroat dealings with fellow Crows & backstabbing abound_

_Crow training - even the survivors come out physically and emotionally scarred_

_Finally, I feel compelled to add another apology to my earlier apology regarding the long wait for this chapter. My new, second? third? or is it the tenth?, apology is for surrounding my chapter in yet another full chapter's worth of author's notes. I will try not to make a habit of it, but reserve the right to add some notes when and if I feel the need to expand on or clarify some topic, motivation, or rationale outside the story._

_I swear this really is the last thing!_

_To any reader who had followed this story before it went on it's studio mandated hiatus, **WELCOME BACK!** (please take another look at the apology at the top of the page). Also, I want to sincerely thank you for coming back and giving this story another try._

_To any new reader, finding this story as it moves from the dustbin to the top of the pile with a new update, thank you for reading too. Can we make a pact swearing that all chapters up to and including this one were miraculously posted on whatever day you began reading this story without any delay? You Agree! Thanks once again._

_Jay_

_Any comments, criticisms, suggestions, or other feedback is always welcome and appreciated._

_See you again soon - I promise._


	21. Chapter 21

**14 Drakonis, 9:36 Dragon**

**Highever Castle**

"You're late!" said Fergus with an air of tense anticipation as he eyed the new arrivals seated upon their horses passing through the castle's gate.

"Blame the damned bandits," Aedan replied as he stepped down to the ground, handing the reins to one of the waiting stable boys.

"Is anyone injured?" Fergus asked as he moved to help Leliana down.

"Not us," Moira answered playfully. "They were quite pathetic really - gave bandits a bad name."

Fergus' eyes brightened at seeing the mage, a fact that Moira did not fail to recognize.

"How is your wife Your Grace?" Moira asked, suddenly serious.

"It's begun. She's been upstairs with Alma and Salma since morning."

Fergus had the utmost confidence in Alma as a midwife and as a healer of no small means. While Alma possessed no magic of her own she was accomplished as an herb woman and surgeon, as many in Highever could thankfully attest. Her skill as a midwife was greater still. Like her mother before her and now along with her own daughter, Alma delivered most of the babies born in Highever and the surrounding countryside. Alma had delivered Aedan and Oren and, along with her late mother, had even delivered him. It was not that he didn't trust the woman, far from it, only that he felt better having a healing mage on hand. Giving birth was still a risky proposition no matter the skill of the midwife or any mage and he wanted all precautions taken, especially since Alma had thought the birth would not be for another week at least.

Leliana squeezed Fergus' hand in support. "Off we go then." She flashed him a beaming smile before quickly departing with Moira. With a bark Elric followed. Aedan had no doubt that his hound would soon find his way to the kitchen. At least Elric would provide suitable warning to Rosie for his own eventual arrival. She spoiled them both terribly whenever they were at the castle, and despite her claims to the contrary Aedan knew that Rosie loved it.

Aedan took the reins of Leliana's horse out of a stable boy's hands, passing them to Fergus. "Since we've nothing else to do but wait you can help see to the horses." He turned back to the stable boy, who looked familiar. "Can you please tell them inside that the teyrn will be in the stables for when there's news?"

"Yes mi'lord," answered the boy nervously and quickly sped off.

"How did you know there isn't already news?" Fergus asked.

"If there was news you would not have been out here waiting for us, wringing your hands."

Fergus nodded his head to his brother, conceding the point. "Now tell me about those bandits," he ordered as two brothers set out at a walk to cool down the horses, a pair of stable boys following behind discretely out of hearing range with Moira's horse.

"I'm not even sure they really were bandits. They have been fools thinking we were an easy mark and trying to take advantage."

Fergus couldn't help but chuckle at the imagined surprise of the bandits at finding they were facing two Wardens - one a mage, an archer of Leliana's skill, and a mabari warhound. Aedan was right it was a fool's game, but he still didn't like it. Since last fall there had been increased bandit activity along the North Road and the Pilgrim's Path. Both he and Aedan had boosted patrols to ensure the safety of people and trade along the highway and they had thought it stamped out, but with the spring thaw perhaps they were wrong.

"You should have come with a guard," Fergus said. At seeing his brother's face he continued. "One-on-one I would lay gold down on you every time. Even against two, depending on the odds, you'd still be my pick. But you're not invincible Aedan and you're not just a Warden. You're a teyrn and an arl with duties and responsibilities beyond simply killing darkspawn and bandits - act like it."

"I will strive to do better your Grace," Aedan said solemnly.

"Don't be an ass!"

The brothers locked eyes until Fergus was certain had taken the message to heart.

Fergus knew his comments were somewhat unfair. Even with his warden duties Aedan was a dedicated and good ruler for both Amaranthine and Gwaren, and he had done well by both. It was also true that the North Road was heavily patrolled and that Aedan did normally travel with greater numbers or else joined a patrol for the journey. This time they had forgone numbers for speed, to be here for him and Diana. Still though Aedan spent entirely too much time adventuring and something about those bandits didn't sit right with him.

"Thank you for asking Moira to come. In all the excitement and preparations my wife could not remember if she had asked Moira to be here," Fergus said changing the subject. His wife liked the Warden mage as a friend and would be pleased that she was here, along with Leliana of course who was like a sister to Diana. He liked Moira as well, she was quick-witted and a charming woman, but today he was more interested in her other skills.

"Thank Diana, not me. For the record she did ask Moira to come although I think Moira would have insisted on coming anyways." At seeing the quizzical look on his brother's face Aedan continued. "Do you remember that heavy storm during Wintermarch? The midwife was stuck at one of the freeholders homes when a carpenter's wife at the Vigil went into labour. Mother and daughter are both healthy and hale, but from what I understand it was a near thing and both were nearly lost. Seeing Moira afterwards, I can honestly say that I don't think I've ever seen her so shook up." He remembered Moira's hands trembling as she picked up her glass of celebratory spirits and how drunk she had gotten that night.

"We've got ten women expecting at the Vigil right now and knowing Moira she'll do anything to avoid a repeat of that night. And if she wants to learn there's none better than Alma, provided she's willing to teach her." Of that neither Aedan nor Fergus had any doubt.

"Ten?" Fergus asked disbelieving. It was easy to forget that there was a small army of craftspeople, labourers, and their families at the Vigil rebuilding to say nothing of the servants, soldiers, and wardens, but still _ten!_

"It was a cold winter," Aedan shrugged his shoulders as if that was answer enough.

"I still would have thought that Moira would be more familiar with it from the Circle. The way the mages speak of the tower it seems hedonistic enough to make even Zev blush; surely children are born there."

It was certainly not the proper time for this discussion, but Aedan felt Fergus deserved an answer in case he decided later to tease Moira.

"If a Circle Mage finds herself with child she is encouraged by the Senior Enchanters to end her pregnancy." He held up his hand to stop Fergus from interrupting. "Any child of a mage becomes a ward of the Chantry and is taken away from the parents. It's true, I swear." The Chantry guarded its secrets as zealously as his own Order and questions, especially regarding the treatment of mages, were discouraged. "Did you know that Wynne had a son? I was always too afraid to ask if she knew what became of him or even if the templars let her hold him before they took him away."

"That's barbaric," Fergus said vehemently. "If anyone tried-" He stopped at feeling his brother's hand squeezing his shoulder.

"I know it's cruel. I hope one day it will change, but many in the Chantry see only maleficar and not the many good, decent mages like Moira. Change when it comes will be slow and some will fight it every step of the way."

The horse Fergus was walking, Leliana's horse Violet taking advantage of Fergus' momentary inattention, decided to bolt prompting Fergus to give chase and effectively changing the subject.

…

"Pardon mi'lord," said the stable boy to Fergus. Aedan noted that it was the same boy he'd sent into the castle on their arrival, now considerably more nervous and excited.

Fergus standing with a hoof between his legs and a pick in his hand looked up. "Yes Malcolm?"

"I was sent to fetch you mi'lord. They say it won't be long now before the teyrna - before she-"

Aedan tried not to laugh at the excited young boy struggling to put polite words to something he likely barely understood. He looked to Fergus who was once again a bundle of nervous energy. It was time.

"We'll finish seeing to the horses mi'lord," the stable master said.

After quickly washing up the two brothers set out for the castle proper.

"You were right Aedan. I did need something to fill the time waiting. Although I think I'll change my clothes before I see my wife." They both laughed.

"Who was that boy? He looks familiar."

"Malcolm?" At seeing the nod Fergus continued. "That's Nan's grandson. Eleven years old and all he wants to be is a warden. You're his hero brother." Fergus took note of the pained look in his brother's eyes. He knew that despite all of the trouble both Aedan and Elric had caused Nan over the years that Aedan had loved the old woman and mourned her loss.

"I'll have to seek him out later for a talk," Aedan said. "Highever needs her sons and daughters too and there's honour enough here with his family. One doesn't need to be a warden."

Fergus had a mind to question his brother on this except he knew Aedan would provide no real answers. He would either jokingly cackle about wardens and their secrets or else it would devolve into an argument neither of them wanted. He remembered when he had pressed Aedan to consider one of his knights, Ser Jerrol, for the Order and he had become so frustrated by Aedan's intransigent refusal that they had nearly come to blows and still Aedan had tip-toed around his reasons. Knowing his brother Fergus felt certain of one thing though and that was if Aedan had his way Malcolm would never become a warden, he just did not understand why.

…

Fergus paced the hall, cringing with every noise, while his brother sat in one the chairs provided for their vigil with a smirk on his face. He was nervous, so very nervous. If anything he was more nervous now than he had been when Oriana had given birth to Oren. Upon thinking of his late wife and son Fergus stopped suddenly, old fears that he was betraying their memory surfacing. He couldn't breathe. He stuck his arm out and braced himself against the wall. A moment later Fergus felt a hand on his back.

"Sit down Fergus and take a deep breath," said Aedan. "Everything will be fine. You'll see."

He could not sit down and turned to face his brother. "It's been so long since they sent word. What if-"

"Oriana was one of the most kind-hearted and generous people I have ever known," Aedan said sincerely, seeing through to the truth of his brother's current fears and knowing Fergus needed the reassurance. "You know she and Oren are looking down on you from the Maker's side with nothing but love in their hearts. They would be happy and wish nothing but the best for both you and Diana and for your newborn son or daughter."

Aedan pulled Fergus into a brotherly embrace with plenty of back slapping. Of course that was the moment when the door opened and they both turned to see Leliana's smiling face.

"If you are not too busy Fergus there is someone who wants to see you." She quickly stepped aside as Fergus practically charged into the room. As Aedan neared Leliana twined his hand with hers and they kissed softly before entering.

"A boy Aedan! I - _we_ - have a son," Fergus exclaimed joyfully as he shifted his arms so the red faced babe swaddled in his arms could be seen. A moment later the babe was back in his mother's arms and Fergus was hugging and thanking everyone in the room, not even the servant taking away soiled linens was spared Fergus' enthusiastic embrace and a kiss on the cheek.

Aedan watched as Leliana moved beside the bed and Diana passed her son into the bard's waiting arms. He watched as his bard cradled the newborn and began to sway softly. As happy as he was for Fergus and Diana - and none could be happier - it was bittersweet seeing Leliana holding a newborn and knowing that because of him motherhood was something denied her. His bard looked so beautiful, happy, and content with a babe in her arms. She would make such a fine mother if it were not for him.

Old fears and heartaches that Aedan had thought behind him flared anew - that Leliana was a fool to waste her life with him and that she deserved someone better; someone who could give her everything she ever wanted. Aedan was not blind. Although they never spoke of it he knew Leliana wanted a child of her own, perhaps even more than one. He could see the longing on his bard's pretty face whenever she held a child or sat amongst them telling stories - something she absolutely loved to do and for which the Vigil's children adored her - but as long as she was with him it was impossible. The taint all Wardens carried within made it all but hopeless to conceive a child, and for him those slim odds were perhaps even worse.

Feelings of guilt began to battle his happiness for Diana and Fergus and he tried desperately for it not to show. It was their day - Diana, Fergus, and his nephew deserved every happiness and more, and nothing should take away from the joy of this blessed event.

"Aedan," Diana called out and beckoned him over.

He had barely finished giving Diana a congratulatory kiss and his well wishes when he found his nephew in his arms. Aedan looked down at the boy and he was beautiful. Admittedly in his limited experience with babies they were all beautiful, but this one was especially so.

"With your permission, we'd like to name him Bryce," Fergus asked.

It took a moment for Aedan to realize why they would be asking for his permission and then it dawned on him. They both knew how he felt about Leliana and that he wanted to make her his wife. It followed that they would expect children from the union and that he too might wish to name his son after their father. He sighed knowing that it was well past time that he shared at least some of the Warden's secrets with his brother, but tonight was certainly not the time.

"It's a good name. He'll wear it well," said Aedan as he carefully set young Bryce back in his mother's arms. He caught Leliana's eye and Aedan hoped that she could not tell what he was thinking. Whatever else was on his mind, he was truly glad that there was another Bryce Cousland and knew that Fergus and Diana would raise him to be as good and fine a man as his namesake.

…

"Bryce William Cousland," Leliana said musically as if the name were lyrics to a song. Like her Warden Leliana was not much of a drinker, but the birth of new child, born healthy and hale, was a cause for celebration. While Aedan had stopped after one glass she had drank another two, and the drink and her profound joy for those she loved as family combined to leave her feeling a bit tipsy before they had retired for the evening. "He's such a beautiful boy. It's a shame that Diana's parents have not arrived yet, but I am happy that we were able to share this blessing with them."

The bard moved to where Aedan sat at the edge of their bed. She stood before him causing him to look up at her.

"Yet, I sense this blessing is tinged with sadness for you my love. Why?"

Aedan muttered a silent curse. His bard knew him too well. It was so incredibly difficult to keep even harmless secrets from her, for Leliana watched him with as keen and loving an eye as he regarded her.

The Warden took up her hands in his.

"Leliana, do you- do you ever regret returning to me? I see you with children and I know motherhood is something you want; something I cannot give you."

The bard looked into her love's eyes, seeing the heartache and fear of her answer. She could not deny that she wanted to be a mother, to have a child of her own and hold that precious gift in her arms. Leliana longed for it desperately. She even dreamed of it, and in every single one of those dreams the father was always Aedan. She did want a child: Aedan's child - _their child_.

Leliana thought of the mixture of herbs and roots that Wynne had shown her how to prepare so long ago that were intended to increase her fertility to combat the wardens' foul curse. From that day to this she had never once failed to drink the elixir each morning. Even when things with Aedan had been at their worst and she had feared losing him, Leliana had never once considered stopping. The elixir had not worked yet, but Leliana had faith it would when the time was right. She briefly considered telling Aedan about the draft before deciding against it, fearing that he would feel an even greater burden than he already did.

"No, I do not Aedan. And yes I do want to one day be a mother, but of _your_ child. I know what the wardens say, but I have faith in the Maker and that he has a plan for us. Most importantly though my Warden, I have faith in you and in our love." Leliana leaned down and kissed her lover softly through the tears they both shed.

For his part Aedan wanted to believe as Leliana did. Except everything he had ever been told, everything he had ever said to his own recruits, about being a warden stood in direct opposition, no matter how much he wished otherwise.

The selfish part of him was glad his bard had no regrets because he did not want to think of a future without her in it, and yet, hearing the fervent belief she held he could not help but wonder if Leliana was deluding herself and setting herself up for an even worse heartbreak later - that maybe it would be better if she forgot about him and moved on. He had not lied to her about the future he offered, either that day on Promontory Point years ago or later when he repeated everything the Weisshaupt Wardens had told him after they had examined him. She knew how unlikely it was he would ever father a child. It seemed cruel to let his love believe otherwise, except Leliana was so happy tonight and he hated seeing her sad.

Two lovers climbed into bed and when sleep did eventually claim them and they began to dream, two lovers each dreamed of a future that stood in stark contrast to each other.

* * *

_A/N: A special thanks to my reviewers: NonOmnisMoriar and mille libri_


	22. Chapter 22

15 Drakonis, 9:36 Dragon

Denerim

Queen Anora looked out over the Landsmeet Chamber at the assembled nobles, scanning their faces and trying to gauge their mood. Of course not every member of the Landsmeet was in the Chamber today; there was a little less than half. It was only those nobles, their spouses and children who had wintered in Denerim: a few due to age or infirmity; some to seek beneficial matches for their sons and daughters with so many others remaining in the city; and the largest group, those with marriageable sons to dangle before her or even themselves in some cases.

Both within and outside this chamber it seemed like a line of dominoes stretching across Ferelden that only waited for her announcement today to start the chain reaction that would cause them all to fall. The ripples of her choice would cascade outward, altering the plans of some who, having failed to woo a queen would then scramble to make other favorable arrangements. Those arrangements, might in turn, affect the marriage plans of others who had thought themselves unaffected by Anora's choice, forcing still more changes and so on down the line. It really was a sad thing that the lives of these young women and girls were being treated as little more than animals at auction - assessed and bartered over for maximum advantage.

Of course Anora felt sympathy for these young women. How could she not? Her first marriage to Cailan had been decided by their fathers when they had both been children. Maric and Loghain, close friends and comrades, had wanted to celebrate that friendship by joining their lines. When she was younger and just starting to discover boys Anora had thought to ask her father whether either he or Maric had even considered Cailan's wishes and desires or her own. She never did, and of course now it was too late to ask that question and so many others; every one of them was dead.

Maric and Loghain's dream of uniting their families was dead too, for despite her best efforts - and she had made every effort to both please Cailan and deliver him an heir, right up until Cailan no longer wished to try and instead sought out the company of others - her union with Cailan had not produced a child, joining the line of Calenhad the Great with that of the Hero of River Dane. Her union with Cailan had not even produced a genuine love between the two. Of course, there had been the friendship born in their childhood, but even that had been tested by the passage of time. Cailan had failed to outgrow the traits of childhood, forever seeking glory and adventure at the expense of his responsibilities, while Anora had simply outgrown Cailan as she focused on ruling the country, seizing the responsibilities and duties he would or could not.

About the only thing her father's plan had accomplished was that Anora still sat on Ferelden's throne, but even that was slipping through her fingers again.

To remain upon Ferelden's throne Anora had to marry and quickly give birth to an heir. Her aptitude, intelligence, skills and her accomplishments all counted for less than her ability to reproduce. The petty cruelty, injustice, and dismissal of the value of women in this patriarchal society was almost enough to drive her to tears. In a world where her lord husband Cailan could whore around with impunity while she had been expected to remain faithful. Even beyond her vows of fidelity sworn before the Maker Anora's faithfulness was codified in law - cuckolding the king was a treasonable offense, punishable by death. Infidelity towards the queen who carried none of Calenhad's royal blood was punishable by no more than gossip, rumours, knowing grins, and even encouragement, either tacit or explicit, by those seeking to succeed where she had failed. To find the proof of how little her achievements were valued one needed to look no farther than the elevation of Maric's previously unknown and unacknowledged bastard Alistair to the kingship, and the ready acceptance of his claims by many even in this room over her own demonstrated and proven ability.

Alistair's death had given Anora a second chance, but it too was in danger of being snatched away. One would think it would be easy to find a husband, a king to rule beside her, and it was all too easy to find a man who longed for power. A man who whispered sweet words of love and fidelity all while plotting his ascension to the throne and her eventual reduction in stature as he sired a new royal dynasty bearing his family name upon her. However, that was not the kind of man she desired. Ideally she wanted a man whom she could love and who would love her in return. A man who would honour, respect, and value her for the intelligent and desirable woman she was. Failing that, she would settle for a man who would at least step out of her way as she ruled Ferelden. A man who would fulfill the one role she required of him - an heir - but otherwise would remain like one of her guards or a pretty chair, seen but never heard. Anora had already played second fiddle in one marriage and was determined not to do so again, especially since it was _she_ who elevated her husband.

And so Anora was left to choose from amongst these lesser candidates. Not a one should even be mentioned in the same breath as the one most suited, bred, and deserving of being her king, her husband, and sitting beside her to ensure a strong and vital Ferelden - Aedan Cousland. The only problem was that Aedan continually failed to recognize his duty and obligations to both his Queen and his country. He should realize that a marriage between the two of them would both unite Ferelden like no other and also strike fear and respect into her enemies.

It was strange that he was the worthiest to be her husband as by all rights she should hate Aedan Cousland, and for a time she had.

During the Blight he had conspired to remove her from her throne and did, in fact, succeed before she regained it upon Alistair's death. Except in the harsh reality of hindsight it could easily be argued that Anora had already been dethroned by her father, Loghain, who had wasted little time after Cailan's death in pushing her aside and assuming the duties and responsibilities of her regent; as if she was some incapable and untutored child. Loghain had come to the conclusion that Anora was not a fit queen for wartime and that he was better suited to the task. Unfortunately for her father, Loghain too was not fit to rule during wartime.

Anora was not one to admit her failings easily and rarely in public, but she took pride in not lying to herself. Since that fateful Landsmeet where Alistair was named king she had scoured her memory, thinking long and hard on every conversation and every council she remembered, on both what was spoken and what was left unsaid and upon what she could have done better.

The painful truth was that her father was right. Aedan was right too. Despite her pedigree Anora was not a warrior-queen. She had a modicum of skill with a sword, but she was not Moira the Rebel Queen, Cailan's mother Rowan or even Haelia Cousland who were all as skilled as any man. So too did she have an understanding of the strategies and tactics of warfare and the proper disposition of forces, but a theoretical understanding was far different from the harsh and brutal reality of the battlefield. A fact first glimpsed in the aftermath of the Blight and then reaffirmed during the darkspawn attacks on Amaranthine. Her father had often said that every commander had a plan of action until the battle had been joined and the first blood spilled, but the mark of a good commander was the ability to react, improvise, and adapt. Anora truly saw the wisdom of it now. She had been woefully out of her depth once her forces had reached the Vigil to help finish the rout Aedan had begun.

Anora clearly understood now that her talents and strengths were best observed during peacetime, where matters of administration, law, and diplomacy prevailed. For someone who always prided herself on her ability and strength of will to meet and overcome any challenge this had been a humbling realization. That realization had to led to others.

It was also true that Anora was not an inspiring leader. Her story, a daughter of a man - born a commoner, turned great hero, turned noble - marrying the future king, was inspiring, but not so much her. In seeking to prove she belonged among the nobility and distancing herself from her family's roots she had alienated the common Fereldan. Her bookish tendencies did not help either as many had already thought her aloof and cold. During the Blight Fereldans had needed someone to give them hope that they would survive in the face of the greatest threat their country had ever known. Cailan for all his faults had possessed a boyish charm that many found reassuring and comforting. He had been beloved by the common Fereldan in a way that she had never been.

Loghain had also once inspired both the common people and the armies, but no matter the tactical or political reasons he had squandered that goodwill at Ostagar by leaving so many fathers, mothers, sons, daughters, and his King and son-in-law to die. He had eroded that goodwill further by all but barricading himself in Denerim, attempting to solidify his hold on the regency while leaving the rest of the country to fend for itself. Her father had sent troops out, but it had been to quell rebellion against him and not to combat the very real threat of the darkspawn which he had grossly underestimated. Denerim itself had been a tinder box waiting to ignite, made even worse by her father's decision to allow Rendon Howe a free hand. It was little wonder that both commoners and nobles alike seized upon the promise of Alistair and Aedan riding into Denerim with victories over both Loghain and the darkspawn and a united army of humans, dwarves, elves, and mages waiting in the wings. It was a powerful image, evoking memories of a young Maric and Loghain and the rebellion and victory over the Orlesians. The previously unknown Alistair had looked more like Maric than even Cailan had and he had inherited Maric's same sense of self-deprecating humour and way with people which Cailan had not, having been raised as a prince in its truest sense. The memory of Maric reborn in his son had been a powerful pull on the nobility and while painful Anora could understand the allure.

Then there was Aedan, a young man well known to the Landsmeet and hailing from one of Ferelden's most powerful houses; himself a direct descendant of Calenhad several times over. While not the heir to Highever Aedan had been trained to lead and it had been obvious to all in attendance who was in command of the armies the Wardens led. It was not Alistair, despite being put forward as king, and it certainly wasn't Eamon who always presented himself as a great leader and statesman, a gross over-valuation of his abilities in her opinion. Eamon had spoken well that day, but it had been Aedan's impassioned words and steadfast allegiance to his fellow Warden that had swayed the Landsmeet and given Alistair the throne, to say nothing of Cousland's later actions. That was the day she had begun to see the true measure of the man, although she had been too angry to see it then.

Aedan had a way about him. His oratory skills taught by both Bryce and Eleanor were impressive, but it was more than that. Whether queen or commoner, dwarf, elf or human, friend or foe, he always spoke to you as if you were the most important person in the room, and he listened, really listened - a rare enough talent regardless of birth. And if he deemed your words worthy he could be counted on to act reasonably, compassionately, skillfully, and according to his own moral compass. Of course, that was not to say that he was incapable of making hard decisions, he was. One merely had to look into his eyes to see the pain and regret, the resolve, wisdom, and understanding that were the legacy of those choices. Anora had seen the proof of this firsthand in Amaranthine as Aedan had made decisions condemning some to death while saving others, trying to make the best use of what people and resources were at hand for the greatest good. Those decisions had not come easy to him, but they had been necessary and so he had made them; an admirable trait for any who would lead.

He was also inspiring. Whether through his manner, words or his actions Aedan made you believe that you were capable of doing great things, of beating the odds, and as a consequence you did not want to let him down. For his part Aedan worked just as hard to insure that he did not let his people down. His oaths of homage and stewardship for his lands were sacrosanct, and his people recognized this and freely gave of themselves. It was a powerful force to see in action. To see it on a country wide scale would be magnificent.

Another reason Anora should despise Aedan was the death of her father. The Warden had slain Loghain before her eyes, splattering her father's lifeblood in this very room. Yet even that simple truth belied all the facts. At her father's insistence Loghain had dueled with Aedan, trying to snatch victory from the jaws of defeat. Aedan had won, disarming Loghain and beating him physically and mentally in a manner in which no other had before. Yet Aedan had refrained from delivering the killing blow. The eerie silence that followed had been broken by the Orlesian Warden Riordan who had recommended the conscription of Loghain into the Order, much to Alistair's vocal displeasure. While others had watched Alistair and Riordan argue Anora had continued to watch the duelists. She saw Aedan unspoken question to her father - _would and could he submit to becoming a Warden? _Anora had also seen Loghain's resolute answer - _Never_.

In the end Aedan had allowed Loghain to again take up his sword, except this time Cousland had held nothing back and delivered the killing blow. Mercifully her father's death had been quick. Anora could also not forget Aedan's words as the guards stepped forward to remove her father's body. "_Treat Teyrn Loghain with all proper honour and respect to which he is due. Whatever he became later in life the Hero of River Dane was still the man who helped throw the yoke of the Orlesians from off Ferelden's back and none should forget it."_

Later Anora would come to see that while obviously Loghain had not wanted to die, it was the kind of death her father would want - to be carried out on his shield. Certainly it was a far better and cleaner death than he would have otherwise received. Had Aedan not slain him, her father would have been stripped naked, chained and then paraded through the streets of Denerim, having filth and excrement thrown at him, before finally making his way to the city square where he would have been beheaded. After which his head would have been set upon a pike atop the city gates as befitted a traitor and regicide.

Discretely, Anora had checked into the crimes and deeds her father had been accused of. While she had desperately wished to lay the blame at the feet of that snake Rendon Howe, she truthfully could not. With her own eyes she had seen her father's seal on the contracts permitting the abduction and enslavement of Ferelden elves, the orders to attack and kill those nobles and their families who had opposed him, and the contracts hiring assassins to kill the remaining Grey Wardens in the midst of a Blight. She had also reviewed the confession and transcripts of the trial of the blood-mage Jowan that Loghain had stolen from the templars and sent to Redcliffe to poison Eamon; an action that preceded his retreat at Ostagar and gave credence to the arguments that Cailan's death had been premeditated. Furthermore, while there was no direct proof, there was enough circumstantial evidence to suggest that Loghain had, at least, given his tacit approval for Howe's attack upon Highever and the execution of the Couslands. The removal of Eamon and especially Bryce Cousland, the next in line to become king as Cailan had never granted her the crown matrimonial, would have left her father with no real challengers for his plans.

Most damning of all had been her conversations with those who knew Loghain best: Ser Cauthrien, his butler Valke, his secretary Geoffrey, and his Seneschal Terrence among others. All had described her father becoming increasingly cruel, intractable and distant; refusing to even hear an opposing or moderating word. They each had spoken the same words as she had, that Loghain, her father, was '_not the man they knew._' Perhaps he had been fighting Orlesians for so long that he had forgotten that there were other enemies to fight? Or maybe his hatred had despoiled the honourable man her father had once been?

In any event, she firmly believed that the man who Aedan had killed that day was not her father. That man was a traitor to Ferelden and to the good man Loghain was and had deserved to die.

It had taken years for Anora to come to terms with her feelings over Aedan. In fact she was not sure exactly when her opinion of him had softened but it was in the months following the attacks on Amarthine that she began to envision a future with him.

In the aftermath of the near destruction of Vigil's Keep and the foiled attack upon the City of Amarthine, Anora and Aedan, among others, had worked closely together: routing the last of the darkspawn, securing supplies and people to aid and feed the injured, and later to rebuild. During that time Cousland had impressed her, not only with his skill in battle, but also with his insight, diplomacy, compassion, and keen intellect.

It was clear then that his parents had spared no expense in either his training or education. He was well versed in the history and people of Ferelden and her neighbours and allies; his contacts among the Dalish and especially the dwarves had been invaluable during this time. While not an expert he had a more than basic knowledge of the production and distribution of the staples of the Ferelden economy: wheat, fish, and harvesting timber. He also had made of point of visiting with the masons, architects, and other craftsmen seeking to better understand the basics of their craft, their requirements, and how best to make use of their service in the reconstruction efforts. Aedan had thrown himself into the task of rebuilding Amaranthine with a passion that was both infectious and a welcome change for Anora from Cailan who had quickly grown bored with difficult tasks.

During that chaotic time there had been many long meetings which had often stretched into meals and late evenings. Not the large gatherings she hosted where much of the nobility attended, but rather smaller, more intimate gatherings attended by only a handful both at the Vigil and later in Denerim. Here Anora began to see another side to Aedan, the playful side with a sharp wit and the storyteller, as he shared tales of his adventures.

Soon she was finding excuses to be in Aedan's company, and she had enjoyed it immensely. They had shared their hopes and dreams for Ferelden's future and Anora had been surprised at how closely Aedan's aligned with her own. With their growing familiarity the seeds of a true friendship had been planted. She did not think herself vain to believe that they had both considered whether something greater could develop between them.

Then that red-headed bitch returned from wherever she had vanished to and Aedan had withdrawn from her. He was still a gentleman in every sense, but Anora had noted the growing distance between them. Admittedly she could have handled Leliana's return better, but she had been upset over the reappearance of a rival and she had also truly missed both his company and counsel. It had not been the same after Leliana had returned and yet Anora had held out hope that what she and Aedan shared could be rekindled. Sadly, it had not.

It was often said that '_a Cousland always does his duty.' _Not this time. He was not even in Denerim.

That last part wasn't fair to Aedan. Anora knew teyrna Diana was due to give birth shortly; in fact she may have already. The Queen also knew firsthand the closeness and affection between Aedan and Fergus. In all likelihood Aedan would be in Highever already, and yet a part of her had hoped that Aedan would come to Denerim instead and sweep her off her feet. That Aedan would finally come to his senses and recognize his duty to his Queen before she made her announcement today and it was too late for them both. Instead she prepared to announce a betrothal to a man whose best characteristics were that he was handsome, his family had been one of the most vigorous supporters of her father and consequently of her, and most importantly that he was willing to conform to the role Anora desired of him.

To be certain Anora did not expect her choice to receive universal acclaim. Nor did his father, who her sources said was spreading his largess heavily throughout the nobility securing support, expect it either. Her soon-to-be husband's family feared that the Couslands would demand their vassal's obedience and oppose her nuptials in the upcoming Landsmeet. A Cousland voting bloc of the entire North and a large part of the South, to say nothing of the mindless sheep that would blindly follow them, would almost certainly end her marriage plans. Yet Anora did not think Aedan would do so. She expected Fergus, among others, to voice his concern over her choice and seek reassurances as to the stability of the throne, but she did not expect even that much from Aedan. He might speak to her privately, seeking assurances that the match was what Anora did indeed want. He would speak platitudes of '_only wanting the best for you_' - an ironic statement when Aedan continually failed to see that what was best for her was him - but once she spoke the lie that the marriage would make her truly happy he would, at worst, simply step aside and be silent.

Anora focused her thoughts; she could not afford to be distracted. Aedan was not here nor was he likely to arrive any time soon and she had an announcement to make. The waiting nobles were becoming impatient, drifting off into their own clusters of conversation. Anora rose from her throne and stepped forward in order to be better seen and also to welcome her intended. She scanned the crowd once again and made a solemn vow to herself.

Of all the dominoes stretching across Ferelden she would see to it that one would never fall. If she could be forced into another loveless marriage to secure her throne then so long as she drew breath Aedan Cousland would never be allowed to marry for love. He and his red-headed whore would never marry. Leliana would never become teyrna of Gwaren and stain the title last held by her beloved mother Celia.

"My Lords and Ladies I thank you for attending me," Anora said. "Today we come together so that I might share a joyous announcement that is not only of import for me but also for the future prosperity and stability of our beloved Ferelden. It is my great honour to announce my betrothal to Ceorlic Yates, son of Bann Ceorlic of the Southern Bannorn. With the concurrence of this august body in the upcoming Landsmeet, I shall wed Ceorlic on the first day of Justinian where my betrothed will take his place beside me as our Prince Consort. Ceorlic is …"

As his son preened like a peacock beside him the noble man listened half-heartedly as the Queen droned on over how worthy and honourable his son was and what their union would mean to Ferelden. It was all lies of course. Lies designed to obfuscate the truth and make it palatable for these bleating sheep. The Queen's words proved that despite her dainty hands and noble upbringing Anora could shovel shit as well as her base born farmer ancestors.

The only real truth was that he had correctly judged Anora's shrewd and calculating mind and moreover her overwhelming desire to remain upon Ferelden's throne. The Queen's conceit and vain belief that only she was capable of ruling Ferelden had been plain to see. So to was her lust for power that easily matched that of her mongrel father. It was only surprising that he had been the sole noble to understand that Anora would never grant the crown-matrimonial; she was too petty and arrogant in the face of her betters to do otherwise. Then again he did not think much of the majority of his 'peers.' And so he had molded his eldest son to suit the role Anora wanted of her husband. Time and tradition was on his side; Queen's did not live forever and that even in Ferelden once someone was legitimately on the throne it was exceedingly difficult to remove him.

Finally the Queen finished her buzzing. Ceorlic embraced his son warmly and whispered 'remember what I told you' before passing him off to his mother Laura for her own embrace. They must be the model of a happy and loving family on this auspicious day.

He watched the crowd as his son ascended the dais, scanning their faces. Some showed anger and disappointment, understandable as the throne was a prize without compare; he took note of the worst offenders. Others when he caught their eye renewed their vigorous applause or gave him a beaming smile or knowing wink. And so the greedy bastards should! Even with the expected riches he would milk from the throne it would take years to replenish his coffers. Of course gold was not the only demand; there were also the plum patronage positions for themselves or their drooling offspring and the betrothal of his two young daughters to be announced once his son was wed.

Ceorlic watched as his son bowed gallantly and kissed Anora's hand. The pair did make a handsome couple, but that was the extent of his kindness towards them. From his mother Ceorlic junior had inherited his pleasing looks and expensive tastes, but none of her cunning or ruthlessness. His son had inherited even less from him; lacking his keen intellect, head for intrigue, obsession to detail or even the martial skills he had displayed in his youth. No expense had been spared in his son's education, either public or private. Some of the best tutors and sword masters had schooled the boy with only adequate results. It had been the same for the lessons on intrigue, subtlety and duty to the family taught at his knee or that of his wife. All that time and expense had produced the middling tool on the dais.

At least with his marriage to the Queen some value to the family and their compatriots could be made of him. Junior could pose and preen as Prince of Ferelden while the Yates family rose in prominence. That is provided his son was successful in the one deed that both Anora and he required of him - a royal heir. With a royal heir bearing the Yates name the future was assured, and no less important he would have his revenge upon both Maric and Loghain for murdering his father. It was just and fitting that their offspring would inadvertently be the instruments of that revenge.

The Bann listened as Junior said his prepared speech about what an honour and privilege it was to be betrothed to the beautiful Queen; the duty and responsibility he felt towards all Fereldans; and the promise of better tomorrows. Ceorlic found it hard not to speak along with his son so instead he watched the crowd, still trying to gauge the mood of the assembled nobles and more importantly how they would vote when the betrothal came before the Landsmeet.

He was so close that he could feel it. Just one last obstacle stood in his way - the Cousland whelp Aedan. Only he could sway Anora or else drum up enough support to invalidate the marriage contract that had taken nearly a month to finalize. If only the prick had the decency to die like he was supposed to. The teyrnir of Gwaren would have made a welcome gift to the groom's father.

His son finished speaking and the crowd began to applaud, Ceorlic joined them, genuinely pleased with his son's performance today and more importantly the reaction to his words. Nothing could be allowed to stand in the way of their union.

_Perhaps I should call the dogs off young Cousland,_ thought Ceorlic. He had paid Ewan Rhys to hire assassins to kill Aedan and thus far they had failed miserably, just like the Antivan Crows and the Orlesians. He weighed the risks. The more mercenaries Ewan hired the greater the chance of discovery and despite his professed allegiance to their cause could Ewan hold his tongue if his role was uncovered? The same held true for each failure - cutthroats were not hired for their loyalty - any survivors would surrender everything they knew for the chance at mercy. It was doubtful that the trail could lead back to him, but could he discount it entirely? The realization of hopes held by generations of his family was within his grasp, could he risk failure so near the finish? Then there was Cousland himself. Ceorlic could not deny that he was an incredibly dangerous and implacable enemy when his anger was aroused - Loghain and Rendon Howe had already proven that. He was also under no illusions of what the outcome would be in a duel between the two of them.

_I shall call upon Ewan and see what progress has been made. If none then the decision is easy and I shall call it off. The risk of discovery is too great and nothing must stand in the way of my son gaining the throne. _As detestable as it was he would have to trust that between his own efforts and those of the Queen their support would be enough to counter Cousland.

* * *

_Author Notes:_

(1) Sorry for the long delay with this chapter. A couple of things conspired to contribute to its tardiness: I had another arthritis flare-up and September and October are always busy months even before you add in the personal commitments (lots of anniversaries and birthdays -Canadian winters can be pretty cold after all and there's not much else to do). But mostly, I had an incredibly difficult time writing this chapter. This is the fourth or fifth (from scratch) revision - to say nothing of the tweaking done to each one - and I still think it could probably use another. For me this is a critical chapter in Anora's characterization of where's she come from and hints at her future actions and while I wanted to get it just right it seemed unproductive to hold this story up any longer.

(2) Hopefully you know how Anora feels about Aedan by now, but as I've not spent an incredibly long amount of time with her I wanted to provide a kind of recap and road map as to how she got there. As she states in this chapter Anora has every reason to hate Aedan except she doesn't, and I wanted to describe why that was the case. It seemed appropriate as she announces her betrothal to another.

I had wanted it to be kind of sad while still leaving an element of a woman scorned - Anora does deserve better than another loveless marriage even if this time it is her choice. And yes there is some willful blindness and rationalizing by Anora with respect to Loghain (understandable) and also towards Aedan and Leliana. However, most characterizations of Anora agree that she wouldn't fully understand why someone capable wouldn't want the throne, and why of the many options available to Aedan he would choose a woman who brought 'nothing of value' to their union. She wants Aedan for a husband not only because he's the best choice politically in her opinion, but also because she has feelings for him, and yet she easily dismisses his feelings for Leliana. Added to that there is some conceitedness (deservedly) on Anora's part that she is an attractive, intelligent woman and a good queen with much to offer any husband even excluding the throne - it is galling that she can't have the one she wants.

Also, in general Ferelden is very progressive regarding the role of women and not really patriarchal (despite Anora's comments), but at the end of the day only a woman can give birth. In a society based around hereditary titles this ability would certainly trump all others, especially where questions of succession exist. I think its natural Anora would feel bitter over this as she is forced into her second political marriage.

(3) I'd like to say a few words about Bann Ceorlic, now revealed as the ringleader of the cabal plotting against Aedan and Ferelden. It incensed me during the Landsmeet that no matter your arguments Ceorlic would always say in his whiny voice, "_I stand by Loghain. We've no hope of victory otherwise!_" This despite the fact the darkspawn were a rapidly growing menace under Loghain's watch and the country was on the brink of a full-out civil war due to his mismanagement (only the darkspawn threat holding it back thus far). From there it became easy to consider Ceorlic as part of a shadowy group operating behind the scenes and that his steadfast support of Loghain was part of some larger plan. Of course there is also the family history to consider as **[SPOILERS: The Stolen Throne]** Ceorlic's father collaborated with the Orlesians, betraying and murdering Queen Moira Theirin and nearly killing Maric (which inadvertently led to Maric's meeting with Loghain). So history is on Ceorlic's side as a conspirator.

(4) I envision marriages for the nobility and royalty of Ferelden to generally be rubber-stamped by the monarch and Landsmeet, but they don't have to be so it's wise to have all your ducks lined up beforehand. If a potential spouse was so unsuited or unfit the Landsmeet (often taking direction from the monarch) could refuse to acknowledge it, making it extremely difficult for heirs to be recognized and possibly even for the noble to keep his/her lands and titles without open rebellion; this is why Aedan hasn't simply married Leliana over Anora's objections as it would impact both him and in all likelihood the Wardens. For a monarch, whose power derives from the consent of the Landsmeet, the choice of an unsuited spouse could easily find their position weakened and him/her ultimately replaced; this is why Ceorlic has been buying support and of course Anora would have to cajole and reassure the nobility as well. There would have been far more palatable choices to the Landsmeet, but none that met Anora's requirements like Ceorlic (the even lesser).

(5) Loghain being carried out on his shield is based on a saying attributed to a Spartan mother, who before sending her son off to battle gave him his shield and exhorted him to return either 'with this or on this.' Meaning to fight bravely and not leave the battlefield until victory or death or else not return home at all. Spartan mothers were hardcore!

(6) I also wanted to touch base on the comments from last chapter with respect to adoption and Leliana's action versus Aedan's inaction in conceiving a child since they are intertwined.

For Leliana, I don't think that as long as she believes she'll bear Aedan's child that she would consider adoption. For Aedan there are a couple of reasons why I don't think he would consider adoption (without Leliana first raising the subject). One, he's been told all his life that it is his duty to continue the Cousland line; that is a direct descendant and not an adopted one - somewhat callous but true. Secondly, there is the violent life of a Warden and the 'Warden's curse' of infertility. He's been told more than once, and has told his own recruits, that it is all but impossible for a Warden to sire a child and he honestly believes it. Leliana knows why Aedan thinks as he does she just disagrees. There is more to come on this subject in later chapters, but for now that's all I am prepared to say.

I also think that for most Fereldans the first choice for the disposition of an orphan would be the Chantry, who would gladly accept them as they would become the next generation of sisters, brothers, and templars. I imagine that some older orphans might have made their way to the Vigil and been accepted as apprentices, labourers, or servants, but not the really young ones. In addition, the memories of the Vigil being destroyed are still pretty fresh and it's also the slowly being rebuilt (4th year of the 5 years Awakening's epilogue says it takes) home to a warrior order, not really the ideal place for young ones (however many families of servants, guards, etc. are there).

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I would like thank my reviewers: Raven Jadewolfe and mille libri for their feedback. It is greatly appreciated and while you can't always see the immediate impact of your comments they really do matter - generally by making me rethink plot points, characterization or the flow of the story.

I would also like to thank everyone who has added this story to their alerts and/or placed it among their favourites -it's very humbling and makes me strive for each chapter to be better than the last. Sadly it doesn't always translate to increased writing speed.

Also, as I stated above I'm not incredibly happy with this chapter, so if you have any comments or suggestions to improve it please either leave a review or send me a pm. Thanking you in advance - Jay.

And finally to my fellow Canucks - Happy Thanksgiving! (October 8th for those not from the Great White North)


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